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[Dyan]

People who have never experienced depression & anxiety haven't a clue.
Don't listen mags,Bev.
It's easy for them to say stuff.
I sometimes wish I was one of them but I wouldn't be who I am.
I wouldn't be on here giving support if I hadn't experienced it
You do what you feel,it's no good pushing yourselves.
That's why I've taken time off work this week.
Working with children is constant.They don't understand,they just see me as me.
When I'm well I can handle it.

[mags]

Thanks Dyan- you have been so kind as well as Bev-I don't listen to my sister as she  only makes me feel worse-can you believe that she has told me not once but twice that my symptoms could be ovarian cancer She has always been v jealous of me as I am married with children and she isn't-  I honestly think that she wants be to be really ill-anywayI won't rant anymore about that. People who have never been through it themselves don't  realize that you simply can't pull yourself together. I once watched a chat show on tv with Jo Brand talking about depression and she said that people who suffer with it are just being self indulgent-when there are children starving etc in poor countries - thought for someone who used to be a mental Health nurse, it was  an appalling thing to say and showed a total lack of  any sense of understanding.
Did you get my pm earlier by the way- I am never sure whether or not they have gone as I sometimes forget to press the send button-duh!  Lots of Lovexx

[Ju Ju]

  To all of you who are suffering from depression. May you see the light at the tunnel.

[bev567901]

That CBT person sounds horrible Mags. I am sure the Friday appt will be better. Some medical people are horrible there is a GP in our surgery who wouldn't give you a plaster for a broken leg, he always has free appts & is very rude indeed. Perhaps start off on Friday & tell them about your past CBT, they may even know the person they won't say anything but you might see them smile to themselves.
You mention PMT, I used to get it too not so I would kill anyone but I was a bit sensitive & maybe a little grumpy. It went after my first off schedule period & was replaced with physical symptoms, strange? I definately felt low after my first baby but she was very prem & I lived miles away from my family & friends then, didn't get meds though, it was only when I looked back I thought I had PND for sure. After Ella being born with her TOF & then getting pregnant 7 weeks after her birth I don't think getting depression got a look in though thank goodness.
How have you been today?  Anything to report?    I have Spring cleaned the bedroom, it was way overdue my wardrobes where a wreck. Been so busy then it was school hols then went gaga so in a mess.   I couldn't have done this a few weeks ago, the only time I felt anxious was when I was in the middle & I made myself feel anxious cos I started thinking what happens if I can't finish it etc etc. Our minds need switching off. Got some new bedding too but the sheet doesn't arrive until tomorrow so I am puting it off until I have all new. Don't u be thinking I am lucky as tomorrow it will be all ruined as I need to set up Beeny's whelping equipment & my lovely room will be made into something horrific. Hen lamp will be up & everything lol. Don't be thinking I'm like something off one of those channel 4 progs either!!!, I am fastidious. I like the pups in my bedroom so I can give them the best start & check on them all night. I do wish I had another warm room to do it in though & I could set up a temporary bed.
Here's hoping you are having a better day, what time is your appt on Friday?  x

[bev567901]

Thanks Ju Ju & Dyan.  What age children do you work with Dyan? x

[Dyan]

Thank you Ju Ju.

Bev-thank you. I work with children from 6mths - 4 yrs.

While we're on the CBT topic I paid to have private CBT 9 years ago.
I had 1 hourly sessions weekly to begin and then fortnightly,monthly until I'd had it for a year.
At first I found it odd but towards the end I could see the benefit and I'm so glad I went ahead with it.
My psychiatrist recommended that I saw someone for my OCD.
I hope it goes well for you mags.
The only problem with the nhs is you only get a few sessions ,unless it's changed now.

[Dyan]

Yes mags,I did get your pm

[mags]

Thanks to JU JU, Bev and Dyan- not such a good day again- but a bit of good news, I had a phonecall from the mental health team just before to confirm my appointment and she was so lovely- I told her about my concerns about my bad experience with the last counsellor and  she said that she wasn't at all surprised as there had been several complaints about her and she has now left .She assured me that the person I am going to see is lovely and will look after me. It has really put my mind at rest! I am going at three on Friday Bev.
well done Bev on doing the wardrobes and good  luck with the pups- Lots of hugs to you all-Magsx
 

[Kathleen]

I've just been reading these posts and want to send my sympathies to everyone coping with mental health issues, I've been there myself and know what you are going through.

I just wanted to add that I read an article recently about the comedian Alan Davis, he says he started therapy after it was recommended to him by Jo Brand (?!) and that he will be forever grateful to her for suggesting it. Other well known people who have had similar help are Sarah Millican and Vinny Jones. My point is that lots of us need a little mind medicine sometime in our lives and it does help; human beings are complicated creatures, that's what makes us so wonderful!!
Best wishes to you all, take care.
K.

[bev567901]

Dyan what a wonderful job you do. Tough age group though in some respect but very sweet. They will remember you forever.
Thank you Kathleen  And Mags great CBT result so you did have a good day sort of xx

[mags]

Hi to you all and to Kathleen- hoping we all  get through this meno Lark soon-Magsx

[bev567901]

I am still googling Mags. I am sorry but I cannot remember have you ever been on any hormones at all? If so did they help.
I have so much to ask the doctor on Monday & think a meno specialist would be better really.
For example I always get a sore throat before my period & have a bad nights sleep & aching limbs. This has been forever nothing to do with recent events. Seems this is down to lack of progesterone at this time & is quite common. I have never googled it just accepted it as its easy to forget about it a day or so later until the next month.
I still cannot see myself getting this way due to my own anxiety. I know it is hormones but how to get them & what to get?
Last month my period was exactly 28 days first time all year it wasn't early, they have been every 3 weeks after being 28 days all my adult life. Last month my period pains started 2 weeks before. Today I have my first sign of period pain & my 28 days is up at the weekend. It will be interesting to see when it comes.  I just wish I could take a magic hormone pill but I know it is not that easy.   I am just worried that I may be improving in some ways due to the meds I have but going backwards in other ways. Silly things are starting to stress me & I don't understand why. For example I wanted to take the covers off the sofa in the lounge the kids use today & wash them but it felt like it would cause anxiety, no idea why I wash everyday. I had a problem washing my dressing gown like a child would have with their teddy being washed last week. This must be an OCD element surely but I'm not sure why. Also I cannot imagine making a complicated meal from scratch. I used to love getting on with things & its not because I don't want to do them or I am tired although I am tired tonight. I barely use the lounge in question so if I took the covers off & washed them I probably wouldn't go back in again until they where ready to go back on anyway. I have never had weird thoughts like this before is it the sertraline or the hormones or none?  I am a real doer of things & get stuck in it's very odd.
Sorry I am talking aloud here, its all just so confusing. Think I need to join you on Friday with your CBT!!!  xx

[mags]

Hi Bev -please don't worry about things- I did try  hrt  for five months earlier this year and whilst it stopped the  hot flushes it caused me constant anxiety and depression-before that it used to come and go, I then started bleeding heavily non stop so had to come off it- I had been wary of taking it as my sister died from breast cancer 19 yrs ago at a very young age, but the GP said that the findings now were changing on the link between HRT and  breast cancer and the risks are much less. I was on a conti one as I am post meno. Do you think that the feelings you are having could be due to you settling on the sertraline?  I know  that all my probs are hormone related- and am wondering if this long spell of anxiety/depression is due to the HRT messing everything up as  I stopped it very suddenly on my GP'S advice as well as the Prozac.
I used to have very weird periods when starting peri- I  was always very regular but they became very erratic and sometimes they would be very light( unheard of for me previously) and other times ultra heavy and painful- eventually  they fizzled out to just a bit of spotting. I would take a list with you to the docs and  ask all the questions about HRT- It didn't suit me but everyone is different. From what I have read about AD's , they can be  as effective  as HRT  for those who aren't able to take hormones.
I  feel that it may well be the sertraline giving you these feelings- I know they can cause increased anxiety in the first few weeks-Idon't think it would be OCD . Don't worry about making meals etc- I  can still barely  get downstairs never mind making a meal. You are  doing really well Bev so don't try to do too much and be kind to yourself-I am sure your GP will be able to advise you. Feel free to  ask  me anything else- Take Carex

[bev567901]

So HRT is not the be all & end all then. Sounds like hormones where causing you a bit of a problem but the HRT caused more. I know it can take a long time to get it right for each person a lot of trial & error but you would probably not want to try again I guess. Coming off any drugs quickly can cause a lot of side effects, no wonder you are feeling all over the place. Maybe the sertraline is having a tougher job getting started but I am sure it will work now you are on the 100mg dose. Its just time that is needed which must seem endless at the moment.
I am so sorry about your sister that must have been a dreadful time, I can't imagine loosing my sister at all. Its a terribly sad thing to happen.
Here's to hoping you have a good day & that chink opens just a little. You have the CBT tomorrow where I am sure you will feel better just because you have had a drive out & are wearing clothes! My ironing pile has never looked so empty even my hard to iron stuff is ready & waiting for me!!!!   B x
 

[Dyan]

Morning mags,Bev, Kathleen,Ju Ju and anyone else who is suffering at the moment

Kathleen- thank you for your post it means a lot.
Mags- so good to hear your good news.
Bev- I hope so  I love those children. There are never 2 days the same.you never know what each day will bring.It is so rewarding.

I'm feeling brighter again today.
Yesterday I had a bit of a downer
I actually got up at 8 this morning and had breakfast rather than take it back to bed and then fall a sleep again.
Mind you,I'm still in my dressing gown but at least I'm out of that bed!