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[mags]

Hi CKLD, I think that is a great attitude to have,  Thanks- that has made me feel a lot better   Magsxx

[mags]

Hi  Bev, how are you today?    I have been for my CBT session this aft and the therapist thought I had gone down quite a bit since last week, despite my better day on Tues, she  thinks that I should start the increase in sertraline now instead of waiting two more weeks, so feeling rather nervous    
Hoping your  day has been ok, Love Magsxx

[bev567901]

Hi Mags, Sorry the therapist thought you had gone down. Did she give any specifics? Maybe to increase the sertraline is a good idea straight away. I would be nervous too but I think you should just go ahead & do it. If it does make you go low you are ready for it & maybe it won't have such a big effect this time as your system is used to it. You are going to get better I am positive of that 100% but you just need a bit more time with you, the meds & CBT doing the work. Its such a rollercoaster this meno lark, its hard to describe to anyone who hasn't gone through it but you know you are not alone here & there are others exactly the same who have come through it, I hope! 

Things have been better for me since my period arrived. Bit of flooding but nothing too bad. Its not as bad as last month mentally so we shall see next month. Keeping notes. Been trying to do a bit of internet shopping but my computer or the websites have been cocking up a bit. I was doing some at 3am this morning zzzzzzzzz The things we do eh but so much better than being on that blummin high street.

When are you going to take your extra dose,  do you take your sertraline in the morning? Also could you get some extra diazepam to help out for a couple of weeks?  xxxxxx 

[bev567901]

Thank you Kathleen & JJ your support is much appreciated xx

[mags]

Hi Bev, It was my mood chart and the fact that I was so tearful I think that made her think I had gone down.   I usually take my meds in the morning so will carry on doing that.   I would give my right arm for this horrid meno stuff to go away, as you say no one can understand how bad it is unless they have
been through it      Glad you have had  a better day and thanks for all your support, Love Magsxx

[bev567901]

I know what you mean about your arm. I tried to get a docs appt to plead for HRT or to up my sertraline & it will be 2004 grrrrr so I booked a telephone appt for 23rd Dec. I shall change Gp's in the New Year for sure. I shan't get HRT over the telephone but maybe the sertraline will be agreed. I am going to do it in 25mg increments if it is ok rather than the full 50mg extra at once. Might take 2 weeks to get to the 150mg. In the meantime I have bought my own FSH test off the net.  They do say it can be another 6 weeks to achieve affect again with the Sertraline but it may be quicker if you are already on it. We just have to be patient I think. If I don't get the sertraline agreed I am going to have to do something else not sure what next, maybe just hang in there & change Gp & hope for HRT.
The main thing is that you are still fighting, you haven't given up. We just have to keep going in the hope things will be better. They will be I am sure xxxx 

[CLKD]

Try not to plan more than half a day ahead.  Think of you! and let others get on with their life for a while.  Otherwise we can get dragged into the whys and where-fores of their problems.

I made lists in the evenings of tomorrow's chores.  That way I had something positive to tick off as I went through the day.  To see what I HAD actually achieved 

As for other people - I don't even consider that I am letting anyone down if I don't turn up.  That was an old habit hard to break  but now it's DH and I.  So long as we are happy and healthy, any thing else is a bonus: into the garden to sniff the roses, out shopping early to avoid the crowds, making a friend who dropped by a cuppa and enjoyed a chat ......... rather than getting embroiled in the 'big stuff'.  Once I began to recover I had to learn not to take on 'too much'  or I would soon get bogged down again.

Meno symptoms are real and have to be acknoweldged even if those around us can't empathise.  Which is why 'here' is the best place to share experiences and feelings <wave>  A plaster on the arm or leg can be seen, physical feelings of panic, tiredness, aches and pains can't be seen ......... or reallly explained as that takes energy we often don't have.

 

[bev567901]

Hi Mags, How are you today?  did you take your extra sertraline?  Looks like the weather is better today, no roads closed due to fallen trees etc today. Sky is blue.......time for a gin & tonic   Ok scrap that time to mop the floors  instead! xx

[mags]

Hi Bev, well I have done it and taken the 150 sertraline    so will have to wait and see, I am quite nervous  but trying not to think about it too much.    Glad you managed to get an appt before Christmas- you never know, they may be able to come up with something. I  think the  idea of changing GP'S is a good one, I did that after my encounter with Dr arrogant, the one who laughed at me , and  am so glad  that I did.     
I really wish we didn't have to be fighting this thing, It's so hard.    I think that with you, once you change GP'S  you will feel much better about everything.  You are trying very hard and will get there!
Good luck with the FSH test and glad you are having better weather, here it's dull and rainingxx

[bev567901]

Yay well done! & at least you are not doing it really close to Christmas. Brave Lets hope this just gives you the extra kick that you need.  Love Dr Arrogant, I have Dr Shithead ha ha. Dr S always has appts spare now I wonder why?? xxxx

[mags]

Thanks, I don't know about brave though
Funny story about Dr A,  my friend used to have him as her gp and she decided that he is another Harold Shipman because he works on his own and the waiting room is always empty,  and you can always get an apt-maybe your Dr S has killed off most of his patients too

[bev567901]

Well Dr S had to write me an apology letter. He was the first one I saw earlier this year & he was so rude. I am really quiet & not very confident & I had to walk out of the room. It isn't like me at all. I did tell him what I was doing I didn't storm out. Most people would have reported him but its not my style BUT he wrote me the letter a few days later I think mainly because he had a student in with him & was covering his ass. He even criticised the book I was reading whilst waiting & said that was making me feel down. Mrs S taught my daughter at medical school she is the same  When I was on the phone to the receptionist to make my recent doc appt she had to put me on hold as her colleague had hurt her hip on the desk & I said don't bother telling Mr S he will give her a plaster. She laughed rather too loudly & for too long, I think he is notorious     And you are brave xxxx

[mags]

Your Dr S Sounds even worse than Dr A, and his wife too sounds awful. I really think that Dr's like that should be struck off.  Dr A too has a reputation, my friend who I mentioned before has a daughter in her early twenties. with alopecia, Dr A basically told her that there was nothing  that could be done and told her to put up with it, he also refused to refer her to a specialist, in the end  my friend and her husband paid for her to go privately and got a  lot more support.  I also have another friend who lost her son to suicide and  a year later, her husband died of a heart attack,  when she told Dr A how she was struggling to cope he  just  told her to pull herself together , she is quite a  strong person and actually told him what she thought about him     I  really admire her for that,   for all he knew she could have gone and topped herself after being treated so terribly, amazingly she  is still registered with him because her husband  liked him   He is a very old school GP who is allright with men but thinks us women make a big fuss about nothing
The apology letter would  have been to cover himself I'm sure.   I too am very quiet and  lack confidence, and I think you were very gracious to walk out the way you did- I bet that really knocked the wind out of his sails xx

[bev567901]

Hi Mags how have you been this weekend ? xx

[mags]

Hi Bev, haven't been too great really,  super anxious- don't know if it's the sertraline or just me , and very low and tearful    we also had some bad news last week about my uncle  who died quite suddenly  and  was the last surviving member of my mum's family,  that has really got to me.  We weren't especially close recently  but we saw a lot of him as children and then his wife died and he remarried,  and we just met up now and again, I think it's just the fact that he was the last one of that generation to go that I find so sad, also sadness for his family.
How have you been-- have you done the FSH test yet ?  hopefully you will  get somewhere  with that Sorry to be such a moan    Love Magsxx