Hi Vicki81,
Sorry for your loss.
For me (and everyone is different) having too much HRT estrogen caused me to have large, sore, swollen boobs, additional body blubber, increased anxiety/jitteryness, increased allergies, increased digestive issues. As soon as I reduced my dose these symptoms decreased. Unfortunately, I believe these symptoms can also indicate low estrogen so it can be a case of gradual trial and error in either direction. I felt I was in a game of Higher or Lower. I went higher first then gradually went lower. I found it particularly hard to manage in peri as I was having big fluctuations.
If you add grief and loss and stress into the mix it is difficult to identify if they are solely the cause of low mood issues or whether menopause is the cause. For me it felt that menopause just made everything feel even worse to how I would have felt without it.
I hope this helps. X