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Author Topic: Advise to help husband understand!  (Read 1291 times)

Luce1

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Advise to help husband understand!
« on: April 28, 2022, 10:15:30 AM »

Hi,

I am a newbie here as although have started to have physical per-menopausal symptom - erratic but heavy periods but now very light, hot sweats, itchiness etc.  I have started to feel incredibly
low for no apparent reason with massive crying episodes.  I had mentioned to my husband about these and that I may need to go to the doctor but think I need to get a list and diary of my symptoms first. I then snapped the other night about something and since then he is not talking to me.

I would be interested to know how your husbands were when you started to get the more emotional symptoms of menopause. I have always been a pretty sensitive person but this lowness is different to what I have experienced before and just concerned since this I am guessing is the start.  I have found some useful links that I can point him to and if anyone experienced the same sort of response from their husbands what else could I do to help him understand. I am scared to be honest as don't like this feeling of getting older and not feeling like the person I once was.

Any ideas or info would be really helpful!!

Thanks,
 
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jaypo

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Re: Advise to help husband understand!
« Reply #1 on: April 28, 2022, 10:26:37 AM »

Hi and welcome to the forum.
I think it's always difficult for husbands and partners as it must seem the woman they married has turned into some snarling sad creature but there's so much help out there and you must try and get help BUT do ask if there is a meno savvy Dr at your surgery as so many of them do not have a clue.
There is a thread on here especially for husbands,would he read through it do you think?
My OH has been supportive throughout,when I'm having a "rational " moment, I tell him that I do love him but have no control when the hormones start up.
Do ask about HRT,I wish I had now but there were so many myths around but now through research those myths are being blown out of the sky.
Xx
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Flossieteacake

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Re: Advise to help husband understand!
« Reply #2 on: April 28, 2022, 10:34:48 AM »

https://www.menopausematters.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,2458.0.html

Here is the link for you. Hopefully he will understand more by reading it.
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Luce1

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Re: Advise to help husband understand!
« Reply #3 on: April 28, 2022, 10:42:24 AM »

Hi,

I have just found it too and will print it off for him. Feeling a bit daunted by it all to be honest as feels like I could have a uphill journey  for the next how many years. Although on the positive we are in a better sharing place then when my mother would have gone through it. Unfortunately she is of the kind of - I went through it without any help so get on with it.  :(. I have thought about HRT and once I have started to track the symptoms this is something I can use to go pre-armed with. Good point about asking for a meno-savy doctor - thankyou  and after listening to Liz Earle on how to ask doctor about the Menopause I want to make sure I am not fobbed off with anti-depressants.

Thanks for your advise and happy to have  found a sharing space.

Thanks,
xx
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Flossieteacake

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Re: Advise to help husband understand!
« Reply #4 on: April 28, 2022, 10:54:28 AM »

I know how it can feel to hear of others who seem to sail through this but from reading the posts on here, I think there are far more women who struggle then who do not. It is daunting going through this and not knowing what to expect. Maybe not looking into the future will ease a bit of anxiety and trying to take things slowly? I personally never look into the future and try to get through one day at a time.

I think HRT can be so helpful. It is always worth a try and if you wanted you could stop it. Itchy skin is usually lack of oestrogen. Before I was on oestrogen patches I had the worst itching ever. Every part of me itched. It is a relief not to have that any more. HRT can also help with the low mood too.

You are not alone. This forum is full of lovely and understanding people. :)
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CLKD

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Re: Advise to help husband understand!
« Reply #5 on: April 28, 2022, 08:02:28 PM »

 :welcomemm:   browse round.  Make notes ;-).  Your husband needs to understand that hormonal upheavals can cause all kinds of reactions to issues.
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