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[lisa_w]

I honestly cant cope anymore life is just not feeling like worth living.
I'm 43 have 2 young girls and finding perimenopause horrendous
I do have other health issues but the anxiety I'm suffering is to much, my heart is so tight.
I have barley left the house in weeks, between depression anxiety nausea headaches flushes pain and just to top it all off I am losing my hair so my confidence has hit Rock bottom.
Due to stomach issues i cant take any supplements,  gp was very dismissive and gave me a prescription for novofem but in reading it says for woman who haven't had a period in 6 months ...I'm having them constantly at the moment.
I bought some cbd oil ...but I'm to scared to try that. My family are getting frustrated because they dont know how to help me and are very worried...I just dont know what to do. I cant remember the last time I was intimate with my poor husband ..I'm scared all the time that my heart will stop
I'm sorry I guess I just needed somewhere to vent.
Thanks 😞 xxx

[CLKD]

R U really suicidal, if so go immediately to your GP Surgery and tell them!

How much impact do your 'stomach issues' impact on daily life?  When my IBS took over I was suicidal.  The GP gave me appropriate medication the next day which saved my Life.  It took a few weeks for the symptoms to settle but I never looked back other than slow transit which can be bothersome.  Anxiety is controlled and I know that the emergency tablet works.

42 and two youngsters is a time when you should be out and about 2gether.  So you may feel that you are missing out.  Maybe have a chat with a local pharmacist to see what might be better than what your GP gave you.  Is there a Practice Nurse? one you could ask for a well woman check: blood pressure, weight, diet and menopause discussion.  Also look to see if there is a menopause clinic in your area and the protocol for referral.

How is your husband?  Do not assume that he feels like you think he does!  TALK! 

[lisa_w]

Thank you both so much for replying I just feel completely lost and alone.
My girls have came home from school and I'm in my bedroom hiding so they dont see me crying...but to be honest I'm glad I'm crying because it's at least an emotion that isnt fear
My stomach issues are horrendous, I have SOD . Gastritis, esophagus spasms and a few more lol  all which interact with each other, resulting in a diet of cheese potatoes and crackers...I csnt get any nutrients into my system at all, which obviously doesnt help and other than b12 and a couple of iron infusions the consultants have discharged me as they cant help I'm dick of begging for help.
Then the perimenopause has blown it all up to much
I want a life and my kids to have a happy mum but I am going further and further down with no fight left in me and no energy to try anymore
My husband and my mum are all I've got and they are trying so hard but I can see the worry on their faces
Grrrrr I feel ridiculous typing all this out and that I'm not making any sense xxx

[CLKD]

What is SOD?

There are various UK organisations to help those with gut problems.  Chrones disease etc.  Have a look-see and ask for advice.  Make notes.

Do not hide from your children, it may raise fear in them. Being told that "Mum is unwell, it may take a while to find something to help so I need lots of cuddles".  Also, delegate so that they feel involved.  The worst for me was when things were happening but we weren't told! 

Your diet sounds rubbish.  Did you not get any dietary advice; if not, ask at the Surgery if there is a dietician that you could talk to.  Have a look-see on their web-site which should list who is available either full or part time.  Same with the Hospital, look at who is employed.  Get your husband to be pre-active and find out the next step. 

When did U last have a full blood count, VitD levels etc. tested?  You will lack energy if you aren't eating properly. 

[Jari]

Dear Lisa

I'm so sorry to read how you are feeling.

You say you think you have the wrong Hrt. What are you taking and what is the dose?

How long have you been feeling like this? Have you ever felt like this before?

X

[lisa_w]

I'm sorry I'm so thankful for the replies  and trying to answer I hope I haven't left anyone out my brain is just not working 😞
My sphincter of oddi came after a stomach operation , which caused them to think it was gallbladder leading to it being taken out when it was fine ...I then after a horrendous time self diagnosed it and fought for a diagnosis and self managed. I finally got diagnosed by luck at an emergency HIDA scan ...which showed the spasms ..
referred back to gastro team at my local hospital who says SOD isnt a thing.
I am low in all nutrients, folate ...I do get b12 injections and have fought hard enough to get 2 iron infusions after about 5 years. I was at a dietician once but I knew more than her because she couldnt grasp that anything that isnt mush or fat kicks my stomach off so much that I csnt move...fibre kills me
I also have a hitus hernia, I'm on ranitidine and 40 mg of esomeprazole twice daily and still get acid coming through my nose at night. ...honestly been years of battles. I cried in gps office last week and begged them to help me get nutrition and her words were have you tried a multi vitamin...ivr honestly spent a fortune on every different type going. I then pushed myself into one vitd and one starflower oil a day...on day 4 I lay crippled on the floor for 24 hours, I even videod it so I could show the gp what this causes next time I have the guts to go in. She wouldn't even look at my balding bits on my head which could be from deficiencies or hormones. She had however referred me to mental health...but I know it's all coming from my body.
I have no faith left in the NHS sadly , I have begged for help but I cant find anyone who is willing.

The HRT is novofem...but on it it says for people who haven't had a bleed for 6 months...mines are pretty much constant at the moment .

Also tried shakes, meal replacement  liquid vitamins and so on Haha honestly it's a nightmare.
I'm now scared to try the HRT xx

[CLKD]

Why would a multi-vitamin be of use?  A proper referral seems to be essential ...........


I would speak to a Pharmacist about the various medications that might help whilst checking with the Hospital about how to access the appropriate Clinic. 

As oestrogen levels drop the muscles may become lax = aches and pains plus hiatus hernia is common as ladies age.  Reflux gave me a repeated cough/irritating clearing of throat - GP gave me meds which have helped.  Eating little and often can help ease symptoms but your diet is crap, cheese won't help as it can aggravate reflux.  Greasy and oily won't help the digestion.

You will be low in everything if you don't eat correctly.  Lack of absorption should be a priority to get an appt. with a Consultant.  Do look at the various gut-related support sites across the UK.  Ask for advice. 

[CLKD]

Crones and Colitis : We are the UK's leading charity for Crohn's and Colitis and we have over 50 pages of information to help inform anyone affected, including friends, family, medical professionals and even employers.

Find out more about the conditions, their symptoms and treatment ? and how you can get a diagnosis if you think you have Crohn's or Colitis.

If you have any queries about the conditions, contact our dedicated Information Service.

British Nutrition Foundation

NHS - Malnutrition (undernutrition) is caused by a lack of nutrients in your diet, either due to a poor diet or problems absorbing nutrients from food.  Certain things can increase a person's risk of becoming malnourished.

[CLKD]

OK - had a look see, like you do  from a US site:

Sphincter of Oddi dysfunction

The sphincter of Oddi is a muscle that opens and closes to allow bile and pancreatic juice to flow between the pancreas and the small intestine. In sphincter of Oddi dysfunction, the sphincter muscle does not open when it should, which causes a backup of digestive juices and severe pain in the abdomen. This condition is treated with medications or a procedure called a sphincterotomy.

Would not an op to by-pass the area be worth while?  OK the patient would need a stoma of some type which could be temporary    .........   I am surprised that you can even get out of bed!!

[lisa_w]

Sphinter of oddi disfuntion is where the valve at the top of of your stomach doesn't work properly...and causes biliary pain and can lead to pancreatitis attacks. Fir example if I take co codomol it causes it to spasm which gives worse pains than labour, and usually raises your liver enzymes.
I have tried loads of medications but none have helped and most make it worse.
My bowel movements the reason I need to est fat and white carbs is i must keep movements loose or I'm in absolutely agony....fruit, veg, anything with fibre sets it off. So in order to keep my stomach pain to a minimum ( which always hurts like a stake from the top right side through to your back) the rest of my health has deteriorated. I have put on weight due to my diet, which was because I discovered I could cope with these after 2 years of basically starving to the point I was malnourished and u underweight.
I had a colonoscopy a few years ago all fine, a few endoscopy over the years which has shown the other issues honestly I could write a book 🤣🤣
It's all deffo getting worse with my hormones...had numerous blood tests and all that ever comes up are my gastric issues.
I honestly they see me as an exaggerating patient rather than seeing the fight I somehow managed to get through life for the past few years lol
I'm so frustrated that I've got here and feel finally giving up due to hormones 😞
I've tried to look for someone in Scotland to pay privately...but I dont know who. 🤷‍♀️
I honestly cant believe people have read all this and responded to me I appreciate it so much xxxc

[groundhog]

I just went to post that info to you CLKD, it does sound pretty miserable.

Hi Lisa,
Just wanted to say hello and to ask you to keep posting. I've got serious bowel problems and I know how it affects everything about daily life.
I'm not on HRT so I can't comment there. I also have children in my life who depend on me ( long story ) and I know what it's like to have to put on a brave face.
Hope you are feeling a bit calmer now Lisa, go and give those girls a hug.  It's good you have your mum and husband to be your ?armbands? and carry you through these dark days. 
I've been where you are and it's horrible but don't feel alone with it all xx

[lisa_w]

OK - had a look see, like you do  from a US site:

Sphincter of Oddi dysfunction

The sphincter of Oddi is a muscle that opens and closes to allow bile and pancreatic juice to flow between the pancreas and the small intestine. In sphincter of Oddi dysfunction, the sphincter muscle does not open when it should, which causes a backup of digestive juices and severe pain in the abdomen. This condition is treated with medications or a procedure called a sphincterotomy.

Would not an op to by-pass the area be worth while?  OK the patient would need a stoma of some type which could be temporary    .........   I am surprised that you can even get out of bed!!

Thank you that's a better explanation than my attempt Haha
There are different procedures such as botox and things as well to try but I was told by my consultant it doesnt exist 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ even though I have a letter from another one saying I have!
I actually think I should make a complaint if I can get the energy to somehow do it lol xx

[CLKD]

Complaining takes up energy!

What were the Consultant proficient in?  Can you not speak to the one who has some knowledge of this?  Maybe ring his secretary and ask for advice?  Consultants get quite territorial 

[MicheleMaBelle]

Lisa- where are you in Scotland?
Sorry about your multiple issues- physical tummy issues aside, it appears that you're having lots of hormonal issues. The right HRT can help. Let me know where you're based as I know of a private consultant in Glasgow ( who also has a NHS meno clinic ) x

[CLKD]