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[prestige]

Ladies,

Since my "wonderful" memopause journey, I have been stripped of many things. As the memopause for me has been both physical and mental, I almost go through life now without "shock absobers". I use this analagy because prior to the menopause, I had great resilience to whatever life threw at me. I was definitely a person that coped and got on with things.

Now, I worry about the slightest thing.Whether its a health issue that concerns me, or any other family member. A small worry that pops in ito my mind quickly turns in to a major catastrophe within seconds. Thank God none of them ever come true, but it does not stop me from stressing about it. All rational thoughts go out the window and it takes all my willpower to STOP the stupid thoughts popping back up again.
It then sends my anxiety through the roof. The anxiety and stress then zap up my energy, which in turn makes me feel tired 

I never knew in a million years how detrimental to my life the menopause effect would have on my life. I laughably thought it was a few hot flushes and that would be it done and dusted.  If I did, I would definitely have drank, smoked and lived life at a much faster pace (if you get my drift) then I have 

I'm lucky that I have an understanding husband and children - although I'm not entirely convinced how much they truely understand.

Thank you for listening to my rant.

[CLKD]

You'l in good Company here 

Maybe make a diary: mood/symptoms/food : to chart how you are.  Also, making a list each evening and ticking off chores next day reassures you of what you achieve.  Any chores not ticked go onto the next list.  Simples 

I forget names of people ......... and where we went yesterday even though I know that I've enjoyed it 

At our age we are often juggling: ageing parents, retirement, children/exams., health issues: give yourself some breathing space!  Learn to delegate 

[JaneinPen]

The meno certainly does have a lot to answer for. It is great to have this forum to laugh, cry and rant on when we need to with judgement

[AgathaC]

Hello Prestige. I can sympathise and empathise with everything you have written. My anxiety is quite dreadful. I'm coping using everything except HRT and AD's but I'm on the edge a lot of the time. During each month (I'm perimenopausal) I'm up and down all the time. Health anxiety about myself and all my loved ones is pretty out of control. If it's not one thing, it's something else. I couldn't agree more with what you say about having no idea the detrimental effect this would have on your life. Actually, I think it's better we didn't know that this shit was coming!!! What I hate most is the peaks and troughs. Woke up quite happy and then late morning, fear came and sat on my shoulder. Now I'm jittery, feeling sick and worrying I'm dying of today's ailment...What are you using to cope?

[CLKD]

Appropriate anti-anxiety medication works for me.  Without Propranolol and anti-anxiety emergency tablet, I wouuldn\t be here!

[prestige]

Ladies - thank you so much for taking the time to respond.

I know this sounds a bit obvious, but my way of coping is just taking a day at a time. I have tried to keep away from social media and Dr Google as much as possible.I know deep down those two things are just not good for my mental health.  I try and listen to some calming music and do some sort of medidation. Although, I'm absolutely useless at it  My mind just keeps wandering off.......

This menopause journey is a blooming rollercoaster. Its the first time I have no control over my body or mind, so consequently I go in to anxiety mode. On top of all this, my GP is next to useless and everyone in my social circle seems to have gone through the menopause with the least amount of discomfort or perhaps admit to others. I then start thinking; OK are my symptoms menopausal?....why I'm I the only one feeling like this??  Am I suffering from some other disease I have not diagnosed yet? Hence the vicious cycle begins.

[CLKD]

So why not explore appropriate medication to help anxiety  ........

I try not to look more than half a day at a time or anxiety can rise   

[sidse]

Hi Prestige,
Your post really struck a chord with me. I particularly like your description of living life without shock absorbers as that is exactly how I feel. I say that I feel that I am walking a tightrope and the smallest thing can cause me to fall. I too miss the old me who took everything in her stride. I am hoping that this is a phase and I will grow in to a new way of being.

[walkingthedog]

Hi prestige and everyone else

I can honestly say I lost my forties due to the menopause I tell people it ruined my life
Unbearable physically and mentally driving me to be under the care of the community mental health team for awhile and onoff anti depressants for even longer

Having a hysterectomy helped with all my symptoms so much. I still have days with low mood and anxiety  but nothing like before.

Be kind to yourselves


Xx

[jaypo]

Oh isn't the menopause fun ladies?once strong women,we now stress our way through life,thinking that every little twinge is going to be the end of us.like you prestige, I take one day at a time and if it's a good day, I enjoy every second of it.you're in the right place here,get whatever you want off your chest,there's no taboos 😊

[CLKD]

Actually as I aged I got more Bolshie  - I now put up with no crap at all 

[jillydoll]

Yes I'm the same.
Nothing EVER bothered me, I coped with everything life threw at me,
and most days I still do now that I'm on hrt, by my god, what a wreck I was, most of the meno symptoms, and feeling so ill, I thought I was going mad!....or going to die, horrendous journey...
I still have bad days, but nowhere near as bad as before, so I think this IS THE best I'm ever going to get, I'm still over analysing things, and my brain over reactes , and those days I just want to stay in, but I suppose distractions help me, so I make myself do things, but I'm only able to with the help of hrt, without that, I don't know where I'd be today.
I've found that I can be more bolshie, a little bit anyway, I was never like that before, but now I'm more...stubborn, if the need arises, instead of a push over.....so it has changed me, maybe for the better in that case anyway.....
Xx

[Rosepetal73]

Sounds familiar.  I have always struggled with OCD type anxiety which receded in my thirties and early forties and has now returned.  It's very uncomfortable; I feel on edge, worried about my health and events (real and imagined) from my past

[Hurdity]

Hi prestige

You rant away! That's what this forum is here for....

Yes the menopause has a lot to answer for - like you I thought it was end of periods, a few hot flushes and bingo - all done and back to normal  !

What was your question?

Hurdity x

[jillydoll]

Oh yes Rosepetal,
Events from my past haunt me too!
They creep in every so often, and it takes days n days for them to settle. WHY?
I can't understand it, I wish I'd have done things a bit differently, but who doesn't, somewhere along the way, but I also know the past IS the past, we can't go back and change things, we can and probably have learnt a lot by them though, and I can do what I have to do now by that knowledge, in events that happen to me now. BUT, I just wish those ghosts would go away, and stay dead.....
Hopefully, one day when all this meno stuff is over, if it ever does, our minds will be more settled..
Until then, some days are still a battle..xx