Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Focus]

Seriously...can't cope with this any more. And yet, there's more!! How long?!!

Worked out that I had my first experience of flooding mid May last year. I remember because I was getting off a train. And maybe a couple of clots before then.

So it's not even really been a whole year.

At least my periods were always regular, however horrendous they were increasingly becoming.

Until the start of November. When they just became permanent.

I wish I'd been born a man.

[Focus]

I feel utterly hopeless.

[Conolly]

Hello Focus,

Don't give up, lady  I've been where you are, not just in perimenopause, my first period came when I was just 10 years old and since then all my periods were heavy and with big clots. I had monster periods which lasted for 8-15 days during perimenopause, but they stopped to NEVER come back again (knock, knock).

I guess this horrific experience is one of the reasons why I don't want HRT. I don't want to bleed ever again.

 
Conolly X

[Focus]

I'm getting constant periods. Constant prolonged, heavy, clots bleeds.

I'm tired of having to go to the toilet every half hour/hour for days and days and days on end, having to get up one or two times during the night to make sure I change. EVERY NIGHT.

I'm tired of having to be constantly buying sanitary protection, constantly washing my clothes, bath towels, washing the floor in my bedroom, hallway, bathroom.

Tired of being constantly paranoid. Tired of never, ever, ever being able to ****ing relax, not when I'm awake, not when I try and sleep.

We're hoping to get married next year, late spring. I'm terrified. TERRIFIED.

How can I try on any dresses? How can I even THINK about wearing a white dress!!!

This is RUINING EVERYTHING ABOUT MY LIFE THAT I ENJOY AND LOVE.

HOW LONG? HOW LONG IS THIS ****ING NIGHTMARE GOING TO CARRY ON FOR?

I. JUST. WANT. IT. ALL. TO. STOP.

SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE IT STOP.

[Conolly]

The only difference between you and me (hormone journey wise) is that I have not taken the mini pill.

Have you tried the progesterone creams? I know they don't work to oppose oestrogen in the endometrium, but they do help with heavy bleeding and are more tolerable than Utrogestan. I'm not talking about online compounded creams. The Australian Pharmaceutical company Lawley have one available. They don't ship to the UK anymore but you could try to ask a friend to buy it for you online? What do your GP or gynae think of the whole situation?

Don't give up, it's going to end soon. I have a blood clot disorder and that's why I thought I would die with all that bleeding but I didn't even had anaemia, being a vegetarian.

Conolly X

[Woodlands]

Hi Focus.
My periods were absolute hell like yours during my younger years and peri....
I useto keep spare clothes in the car as I was a community nurse......
I now have my second Mirena in and never looked back...... No periods ever and I'm not menopausal as yet as I have ovarian. Cysts which suggests my ovaries are still producing eggs and I'm almost 56.
Woodlands xx

[Focus]

I was given Norethisterone from the hospital I was referred to for the bleeding, back in November. It made me feel like myself again (quite apart from stopping the bleeding). But I was my usual, super positive, very happy self.

Then I had to stop taking it and I crashed again after a couple of days, and the bleeding came back with a vengeance. I was hysterical to my GP at that point and she didn't react well (even though she knows I have PTSD).

I need to have the impression (at least) that I have choices and am the one that's in the driver's seat and the one in control. Having someone else just assume control and make decisions for me is *extremely* triggering for me, and I was beyond the point of being able to take a step back from it all and detach. Yup, because that's what happens in PTSD...you get to a point where you can't detach any more and you go into fight or flight overdrive.

Now, I've spent many, many years becoming very good at lengthening the gap in time between feeling triggered and reacting. When I first started on this journey, I would have panic attacks on the bus, sometimes multiple times a day. Now I never really have panic attacks any more. I've worked really, really hard on all of that.

I also know *logically* that there are no winners in the fight or flight scenario. We both end up losing, because I don't get the help I want and need, and the person on the receiving end has to deal with my massive over reaction. But emotionally...aw man, don't even think about crossing me. I know I will win and get my way. You have no idea how determined I am (that determination saved my life at one point, that's how strong it is).

So my GP was telling me that she was making an appointment for me on a specific date (I can't work like that as I'm self employed, which she knows. So my work has to come before fitting everything else around that). She was telling me what she was going to prescribe without giving any explanations, and what I should and should not be doing, again without any explanations. All massively triggering for me, in an already super heightened state. You know what? It's my ****ing body.  So I cut her dead. Called and cancelled the appointment. Won't ever speak to her again. EVER.

I've since found out that I *can* take the POP and Tranexamic Acid. And that taking the POP and Norethisterone isn't the best idea, but it won't kill you. I think she was really angry that I was doing anything and everything to make the bleeding stop using whatever she had given me access to and without consulting her first.

[Focus]

Checked my diary for last year for dates about my period...

Maybe from a year before this May 2017, I stopped getting the sore, sensitive  and slightly swollen breasts I'd always had the week before my period, as part of my PMT

From May 2017, occasional clot and maybe a couple of episodes of flooding.

From August 2017, increasing heaviness and number, size and frequency of clots. Occasionally flooding at night. Still within the bounds of what I'd call normal though (although definitely not normal for me).

2 October, blood test for iron (very low when results came through). I think I'd been having heavy periods for a bit by then, but they were always very regular and always 4 days long.

11 October, given Tranexamic Acid by GP for period heaviness and size and number of clots.

19 October last 4 day period starts, 4 days was always my regular length. From then on, is not just horrible, but chaos.
20 October period so heavy and clotty took first course of Tranexamic acid.

22 October-12 November Last three week break between periods

2 November, started Cerelle on suggestion of GP
Didn't seem to help with the bleeding. Took most of one strip

12-19 November 8 day period very heavy, very clots, flooding period
26  November-7 December 4 day very heavy, very clots, flooding period stopped by referral to hospital and taking Norethisterone

1 December Loestrin 20 day 1
4 December normal 4 day period
Withdrawal bleed around Christmas

28 December Loestrin 20 strip 2, day 1

Then I just stopped taking notes as I thought things would be normal after that.

About the 10 January, maybe started a bit of spotting
About 15 January, return to heavy period with clots and a bit of flooding

[Focus]

How far am I into this whole thing?

[AgathaC]

Focus - I've only just seen this thread. I've replied on the other one xx

[Conolly]

Ok, you had been on a lot of drugs, so that's definitely different from my experience, I only tried HRT for 3 months and stopped, but that was after skipping many periods.

What do your doctors say about all this? I'm sorry if you had already posted somewhere, I don't have time to read now.

Perimenopause is about massive hormone fluctuations (mainly oestrogen), progesterone levels tend to decrease steadily, but sometimes abruptly (my own case), so maybe you would benefit from the progesterone cream I linked on your other thread, Profeme 10®. My opinion, totally subjective, is to stop all other drugs, because they haven't worked properly and also to know where exactly you are in perimenopause (middle or end) and try the prog cream.

Conollly X

[Focus]

Problem is I'm self employed.

If I can't work I don't earn any money.

So, do I just turn down all the jobs that are offered to me for the next 6 months/a year? Because *sometimes* (and heaven knows when) the flooding is so bad that I can't leave my house?

How do I earn money to live? No savings, no sick pay.

I need to find some way of stopping all this **** from happening to my body. I'll do anything.

Currently restricting. At some point my weight will be low enough for the bleeding to stop. I've been there before (early 20s).

[Conolly]

I understand you, trust me, I've lost my job, partner and house. My savings literally saved me, but it's been hard to get back to a job I like and savings won't last forever. You're lucky to love what you do, and you don't have to compromise it. If the NHS can't find a solution and you can't go private, your GPs must refer you to someone who can sort this out.

I don't think restricting your calories will make any difference now, perimenopause is unique regarding hormonal fluctuations. If you're not taking oestrogen, you can try a strong progesterone cream OTC to see if it helps. Some members have experience with it, I'm not sure if the reason is heavy bleeding though. Mary G and Dangermouse comes to mind, but there may be others.

Conolly X

 

[Focus]

I only just rebuilt my life from the ground up and a half years ago.

I can't face another round of that sort of stuff.

[Focus]

Restricting is about control ultimately. I can control that at least.