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[weathergirl]

Hurdity, I would say that I'm still very much pear or hourglass but with slightly thicker waist. I haven't gone apple and don't expect I will.

I've always had curvy butt/thighs and don't see those disappearing! LOL. When I think apple I think a waist that is nearly same width as hips or even larger, with generally more slender legs - weight primarily in torso without defined waist.  But I get what you mean.

Waist does thicken for sure, but I think whatever one's overall body shape is, it stays true don't you think?  Hmmmm....trying to remember some women in my life and what their shapes looked like as they got older.   My Italian grandmother absolutely maintained her hourglass. It was a large hourglass and  she was so lovely!! 

I think the idea of a food diary/tracking intake is a great one! I think we can tend to forget every morsel we've consumed. Easy to do when days are very busy! xx

[weathergirl]

CLKD, any muscle you put under stress with resistance/weights will build/strengthen. There are two different issues here. One is fat, the other is muscle.

We all have muscle underneath our fat tissue. It's depends on how much fat tissue you have as to whether you can clearly see the muscle or feel the definition. I do leg workouts with squats, biceps triceps, back, hamstrings, all of it. My muscles are very, very solid. Some are certainly covered in a layer of fat (my butt/thighs), but the muscle is strong and I can see some definitions still.

We'll see how that goes in the future.  Much like any form of exercise, retaining or building muscle depends on how much you work at it and how dedicated and consistent you are.

Ah.... thank you for explaining the apron reference!  Here in the US, we more talk about boobs going south and sitting on the waistline. I've never had much of a bust line, so there wasn't much of anything to go south!! 

 In all of this discussion, I  try to keep reminding myself that the most important part is just to feel healthy, and know that I'm doing things that are benefiting my health, even if we aren't seeing our shapes be what they used to be.

 It can be hard to let go of that desire to retain our more youthful shape, but best to foster acceptance and appreciation for the things that we do have still. I try hard to embrace that,  not always successfully I might add. We live in a very youth-obsessed (at all costs) culture. But I am realizing that it's all in our mindset and where we choose to put our energies.  xxxx

[CLKD]

Weathergirl - there was a TV programme in the UK where people were asked to discuss with a counsellor what they ate every day for a week: then a camera was put into their ground floor so that they could see what they *really* ate  .  Surprisingly it was the extras that put their weight on, i..e picking whilst cooking ....... or going back for 2nd helpings when already full; or cooking with a lot more oil than they thought or drinking more wine than they told the counsellor - all the reasons why the weight was sneaking on.  I think because food is available [in general] many families buy too much rather than meal planning. 

I need to bite the bullet and step onto the scales  .  Do more exercise.  Eat less cake and choose nuts or grapes ......... but the latter don't fill me 

[CLKD]

Dedication - now there's a word not usually in my eye-line  other than to my husband and garden 

I danced until I was 18.  We cycled/walked a lot, through necessity whilst growing up, now it is easy to do something other than exercise.  I never thought I would say that.   .    I know what I ought to be doing, I even have a treadmill upstairs ........ we live in lovely countryside too. 

I need a 

[weathergirl]

CLKD,  The results without monitoring make perfect sense! I think so many of us completely forget about things that we eat just on the fly. I know I do! And you're absolutely right, it't all the extras that out over time. I've definitely going to start writing down what I eat. Even if it's just an informal list that I keep at my desk at work or wherever. It's a great idea  for bringing more awareness to what we're consuming.

 Believe me, I completely understand about there being a million other things to do besides working out. xxxx. There are many, many days I have to absolutely drag my butt here to the gym. I drag myself kicking and screaming.  I think the reason that I am able to stick with it is it's been a habit for me for decades. I started in my late 20s and have continued. But there are SO many other things that I want to do. 

The other incentive is the physical aspect of it. The very few times I've skipped several weeks and not done any workout, I can feel the loss of endurance or strength, and it troubles me. I don't like that feeling,  so that in and of itself as incentive to keep up with the exercise. 

And cardio, in particular, helps my anxiety SO much.  The majority of the reason I do cardio is for my mental health, even though I know that the cardiac benefits are the primary reason to do it. I think I would've lost my sanity a long time ago if it weren't for cardio   

[CLKD]

I can hear you screaming from here  - just don't scream too early as we're on different time zones 

A lot of my School Reports stated 'must try harder' 

[weathergirl]

CLKD, well you certainly try here! You're a great resource and support for so many women here. xxx 

[CLKD]

      apparently I can be 'trying' too  ........

[dangermouse]

I lost a lot of weight (from 10'7 to 8'2) when initially unable to eat for a few months from oestrogen surges. I had about 500 cals a day drinking milk to keep me going and the weight just fell off and scared me.

Since last year when could eat again I put it all back on and now even if I have 500 cals (tried to test it for a week) and didn't lose one pound. Also exercised and tried and it and no change. I also read in one of the meno books that the author found, as have I, that low sugar, low carbing and/or fasting makes weight stay on when in the past the opposite happened. She did the Atkins induction for 2 weeks and didn't lose anything. She tested with the ketosis strips and couldn't even go into ketosis (like the natural form you go into when fasting during the night - not the dangerous keto-acidosis).

I always found the intermittent fasting was very effective in my 30s as it would keep my insulin levels low and I would go into fat burning mode very quickly and could taste the ketones like you do when wake in the morning. However, I tried that too and just put weight on!

I've read that when we have a state of higher adrenaline, as common in peri, then fasting pushes the adrenaline even higher and this actually makes insulin go up. So what fasting does for men and young women, the opposite happens to women with hormonal issues.

I'm not taking anything at the moment, apart from homeopathic and I'm just trying 1000 cals and daily exercise (although without my prog cream my tachycardia is back so stamina is low) and I've had a tiny loss but interesting why it fell off so quickly last year, as my adrenaline levels must have been through the roof with all the nausea.

I've also got more fat on belly and arms (which I never put weight on before) but still pear shaped but I'm not post meno yet. Although my Mum is still pear shaped.

[weathergirl]

Dangermouse, this is exactly how I feel!  I have suffered severe anxiety off/on my whole life.  During particularly bad spells the weight would literally fall off of me.  I had to struggle to keep it on.  That is still the case, but fortunately my anxiety is relatively under control and has been for a while, so no anxiety-induced losses. 

But in terms of just basic weight maintenance, what used to work in my 20's and 30' doesn't work at all.  Cutting calories, high protein, all of it.  I have always been very fit and athletic and none of it is working.  I still have good muscle tone (under the layer of fat!) but in terms of trying to lose a few pounds, forget it.   It is not budging.  I'm just doing my best not to gain!  In the past, if I wanted to lose a couple of pounds it was effortless.  Those days seem gone!

1000 calories a day is very minimal for an active person.  If I ate that little, I think my body would go into a pseudo starvation mode and retain the fat/weight as a defense mechanism.  Is that something you can sustain in the long run?  It seems like that would be really difficult.  I am trying to find a balance of eating enough and being active enough so that it all equals out.  Not easy though, as you say, if your energy levels are not great. 

Many, many times I force myself through workouts, but wonder if I am just upping my cortisol and stressing my body even more by forcing the exercise when I feel tired.   It's so hard to tell.  A lot of it is mental.  If we always took a day off when we felt tired, we'd probably never exercise! LOL!  So I shoot for 5 days a week with some very hard work outs and some lighter and hope to balance them based on how I feel that day.   Any activity is better than none - that's what I say!

Thanks for your insights as I found they resonated for me very much!

[dangermouse]

Glad they helped so you know it's not just you!

Prior to me losing all the weight I always have had to stick with about 1400 cals for maintenance, anymore I put weight on, which is why the intermittent fasting suited me (I did the Warrior Diet with one main meal a day and grazing on healthy bits in the day). My mum is the same and we just put it on easily so have to stay low cal. I have tried more over the years in case it was slowing down my metabolism, up to 2000 a day but I then started putting on a pound a week so have to stay low, some people just do and I think it's to do with natural muscle differences. I have women friends who have muscle'y arms without doing any exercise and can eat 2000 without putting on weight.

I don't believe in the starvation mode theory (apparently started by protein shake companies to get people to eat little and often to use their products) as I wouldn't have lost all the weight when I did barely eat last year.

[weathergirl]

Dangermouse, I see, so you have always watched your caloric intake.  Your diet makes sense then. For me the past 4-5 years has been really the first time in my life I had to watch what I was eating.   I was exactly how you describe your more muscly-armed friends - exactly!  That is, up until about 5 years ago - LOL!. 

I think the ability to lose weight ties in with so many complex factors: insulin resistance, thyroid health, adrenal health, and the other sex hormones that are depleting during menopause.  It's like the body is reeling internally trying to come to some level of homeostasis!   When you factor in activity levels (or non-activity) as well as food intake, it really is a complex equation, isn't it?  Just trying to figure out how much to consume, how many calories to try to burn, and fighting the natural decline in muscle tissue of aging are enough to make your head spin! 

I still haven't figured it out and I need to really get dedicated to trying to stick to a particular diet of macros for a while and seeing how that works.   It's very frustrating.  Thanks for sharing your experience!

[peri]

Picking up on what you said about body shape Weathergirl I'm pear or more hour glass too.  I've put weight on my bust and my tummy which isn't quite as flat as it once was since meno but I don't think I'll go Apple.  I still go very in and out and have a large hip to waist ratio, it's my bones and I can't see it altering.

I take your point about weight though I could always eat what I wanted until 45 but it's harder now than ever, it's as if my body is proficient at keeping hold of it! I have lost recently by being very strict and eating healthily (not dieting) x

[weathergirl]

Peri, yes my situation exactly!  Hug!

[weathergirl]

Ugh...just stepped on the scale and have gained yet another pound.  I know it seems nothing, but it's frustrating as hell!  Oh well.....keep going at the exercise and trying to monitor my food intake.  I simply don't know what to do at this point.  I was browsing around the internet and kept seeing threads of women claiming they packed on pounds during menopause for apparently no reason.    I don't want that to happen but it's strange to be in a place where I almost feel powerless to stave off some of this.  I have so little to complain about in the scope of things....so thank you for listening and feel free to give me a smack to snap out of it! LOL!