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[JayneE]

Hi.. I am 45 years old and over the last 16 months have been having irregular periods... In the last 3 months I have become really down, feeling like my husband would be better off on his own, crying at everything (I am not a crier), I have difficulty concentrating at work and generally fatigued.  I have gone from being a strong woman to a crying shambles.. I visited the doc yesterday and she refused to accept that it as menopausal and gave me anti depressants... She is also querying a urine infection as over the last 2 weeks I have needed to wee 5 - 7 during a night... I am lucky to have a supportive husband and family but I was in shock at being given anti depressants when I felt that I knew my body and despite showing the diary that I had kept I felt like I was being fobbed off...  Is this the start of menopause or am I just down in the dumps?  I'm such an upbeat person... My son text me this morning to say that I have always been strong and there for him and now he will always be there for me...bless him and he made me cry again

[Dancinggirl]

JayneE - welcome to MM
Menopause symptoms can start early and strange effects can emerge that are difficult to pin down in terms of a cause.
In the peri stage the hormones fluctuate which can cause low mood etc. You haven't told us about your cycle?  Do you still get regular periods and are your low moods linked to the cycle in any way. I would hold off using the ADs fro now and perhaps in a couple of months, having kept a more precise diary, I would would hot foot back to the GP and ask for a blood test to look at FSH levels (which might indicate meno) and thyroid function (which might explain fatigue etc) to give you some peace of mind. It may be worth seeing a different doctor at the practise - maybe find out if there is one who specialises in treating meno symptoms.  Perhaps ask to be referred to a meno clinic or specialist?
It's worth looking at lifestyle to start with - diet and exercise, keeping the weight down and sensible exercise are very important. HRT can sometimes help but in the early stages of peri meno HRT can add to the problems if you get side effects.  If you are getting flushes, night sweats etc. then HRT would definitely help.
Do read up all the info on this site to get clued up.  DG x

[Cassie]

Def sounds like you are going through peri meno and I cannot understand why your Dr feels the need for the AD's! Get a blood test yes and then you cam make an informed decision on whether you feel you need HRT depending on your symptoms and how you are coping .

[JayneE]

Thanks Dancinggirl.... I am still having periods.... Over the last 12 months, I missed 3 or 4 periods and then this this few weeks I missed one, had one and then another 14 days later..  I exercise 2 - 3 times a weeks at gym/classes and my weight isn't an issue...  I specifically asked the doc for the blood test and she refused saying that it's not recommended at my age.. Despite telling her my mum was late thirties/early forties when she went through it... This new bladder issue is getting to me - there was protein in my urine so she started antibiotics but I've read that urge incontinence can also be part of the menopause.. I'm just so confused - Antidepresants were the last thing I expected to come out of the surgery with... I only really expected a blood test and a sympathetic ear...none of which were provided x

[MIS71MUM]

Hi JayneE
I could have written that post. I was so positive and upbeat and had so much energy.
I'm 45 and have been missing periods for 5 years.  I had a blood test and it confirmed I was peri at the time. But they aren't reliable and can change from month to month.

I saw a private gyny the other day would confirmed that HRT can improve your mood. I too, had a GP that prescribed AD's and refused to believe that my downess was caused by peri-menopause. I now know differently.

I'm the same where crying is concerned and what a lovely thing for your son to say.

I'm sure the NICE guidelines prescribe HRT for someone presenting your symptoms. However someone on the forum more knowledgeable will have to confirm this.

How do you feel about the AD's and what did they prescribe to you?

[MIS71MUM]

BTW - my Mum was 28 so there could be a strong genetic link.

You'll get a sympathetic ear on here.

[JayneE]

Hi Mis71Mum.  I have started the anti depressants today but after the couple replies I've had on here, I'm thinking maybe I need to go back to a different doc at the surgery.. She's given me Citalopram..  I'm never at the docs but I really felt that I needed guidance and confirmation of the menopause - it's definitely cyclical - think my husband has a good handle on it as well - he can quite often tell... But I'm so lucky that he likes to sit me down and just talk things through and asks what else he can do to help... X

[Dorothy]

Go back and see a different doctor & keep going back until you get one who will listen!  I started getting symptoms at 35, and wasn't diagnosed until 39 (after moving surgeries).  It is scary how many GPs who are confronted with obviously perimenopausal women just keep dishing out the ADs.

Blood tests aren't reliable, so you really need to be diagnosed based on symptoms.  Unfortunately, many GPs are scarily ignorant of the menopause & have it fixed in their minds that you can't have any symptoms until you are past 50!

[babyjane]

Hello Jayne, it sounds like you have a good man there.  There is an 'Advice for Husbands' section too which explains what they can expect.

Your GP sounds ridiculous and I would urge you to find one that actually knows what they are talking about.  Sorry but I get so cross when women are fobbed off when they know their own bodies and doctors clearly haven't the time or the inclination to listen.  Citalopram is cheap and easy and gets you out of the consulting room but is not always what you need.  And yes, urge incontinence can indeed be hormonal in origin and a symptom of something called vaginal atrophy which is best treated if caught early.

I reckon I started perimenopause in my mid 40s looking back but didn't even know such a thing existed back then.  I wish I had known what I know now as a result of this forum.

Stick with this lot here is my immediate advice

[Stella1]

Hi. I had very similar symptoms to you when I was in my mid 40s, but then I also started to have panic attacks and couldn't go to work. My doctor put me on citalopram, but also said to stay on the contraceptive pill as I was probably peri & needed the extra oestrogen. The antidepressants worked well for me - I felt normal again & went back to work. I stayed on citalopram for a couple of years - during that time my father then my mother died so I felt I needed them! I'm now off the antidepressants & the contraceptive pill and am about to start HRT instead as I'm getting mood swings & am overly prone to crying (no panic attacks though) but also have vaginal dryness & night sweats. My doctor has used HRT herself and is very much in favour of it. If you're not happy with the antidepressants then I agree you should see another doctor. So glad you've got a supportive family. Hope you can get a supportive doctor too!

[Dancinggirl]

JayneE - you need to see a different GP or insist on a referral.  If your periods have been erratic and there is a history of early menopause in the family then you may well need some HRT. Keep us posted.  DG xxx

[Hurdity]

Hi JayneE

  from me too.

How can your doctor refuse to accept that it is menopause and then say blood tests are not recommended at your age!

Exactly!! At your age - 45 and over the doctor should diagnose peri-menopause from your cycle length and symptoms and blood tests are not needed. If your cycle has changed so that you regularly skip periods so your cycle varies by at least a week each time and especially if linger than normal, and you are having symptoms then you are peri-menopausal and HRT is the recommended course of action if there is no medical reason why you should not take it.

As the others have said - don't take the ADs and change your GP/consult a different GP in the practice - ADs should not be given for hormonal problems and especially if you are not depressed!!!

Hurdity x

[CLKD]

 

[Mary G]

JayneE, it does sound like you have reached the menopause.  I am going to say what I always say and that is if you don't have any luck with your GP or find that you can't get an appointment with a Menopause Clinic within a reasonable time period, why not contact Professor Studd in London and have a consultation with him?  Many of us on here are his patients and he is the best when it comes to all things hormonal/menopause related and I am in no doubt he would be able to put you onto the right HRT regime.  You will have to pay but if it means getting your life back, it is money well spent and he will write a letter to your GP with his recommended prescription.   I believe he also does telephone consultations if that helps. 

[Lizab]

Hi! I can only echo what the others have said. It sounds like menopause. It infuriates me how many women on the forum are told they are too young and given antidepressants. The average age is only an average. The window of age range is not so small that one has too be 50 for it to be menopause. It's ridiculous. I feel very lucky that my bleeding became an issue first and put me on the menopause radar, and the other meno symptoms started in soon enough that the bleeding never led to surgery. I'm 39, and hate to imagine what I would be facing now if my doctors hadn't acknowledged the possibility of menopause. My mom was also early 40s. It seems like those who are having regular-ish periods have more difficulty having their issues addressed.

All that said, there are lots of women who do well with antidepressants, and I imagine it was first choice after the WHO studies scaring everyone off hrt. You could see how they work for you, and at the same time be aware of issues that only estrogen can help. There are threads on the forum on vaginal atrophy. If you feel well with the AD and don't immediately pursue hrt, just be aware of the symptoms of these other ailments so you can demand hrt if it's showing signs of becoming an issue.