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[CLKD]

Mum did tell me after Dad died in 2006 that she no longer wanted to deal with anyone else's problems 

[Oon]

Sorry to hear things are so tough just now Downdillie, but I'm sure there is light ahead. I agree with Clovie - get back to feeling like you first of all and then tackle the other stuff.

For what its worth I'd push your GP to try HRT. When I went on it it made a big difference. It might not do the same for you but its got to be worth a try? And if your GP is not up for that then change your gp 

Good luck. Be gentle with yourself.

[DownDillie]

Hi everyone,

Thanks so much for your advice - it really helps. I've never been much of a talker, I find it so hard to talk about anything. I think this has contributed a lot to my problems.

Yesterday I had a brilliant day, worked really hard and got loads done. Felt great apart from a bit of tension in my chest to begin with. Today, it's back, the crunching weight in my chest together with digestive woes and general despair. In tears.

I will go back and look for HRT, so I can get back on some kind of even keel.

I am also trying a Mindfulness book / audio which I hope will help me deal with the terrible cycle of anguish / self-recrimination / panic etc.

Gotta go, am already late getting ready for work but thanks again, I'll report back.

[CLKD]

You did too much! 1 needs to pace one-self  .  Half a day at a time, if you feel good don't do TOO MUCH!  I had to learn …. to enjoy the good 

[Hurdity]

Hi Downdillie

A belated  - have been on holiday - and I never look at unread posts - if I've been away, I just go to the boards and only go back a few ie look at the latest posts otherwise I would never get anything else done!

I just agree with everything everyone has said.

During peri-menopause it is the extreme fluctuating hormones which cause the symptoms, but post-menopause it is the ongoing lack of oestrogen that causes different symptoms - and may well be the cause of your continuing low mood. Some women will "sail through" menopause - as some like to say - but this does not mean you will never experience symptoms of oestrogen deficiency.

So - you may well have problems in your life - but your low mood makes you less able to tackle them and feel that everything is hopeless. As has probably been said already - if you take oestrogen and your mood lifts, you will feel better physically and then you will be mentally better equipped to concentrate on what you need to do to sort out your issues and problems, hopefully without despairing. So yes I would sort this out first - and the therapies and strategies to deal with anxiety reap benefits for many women - judging by the reports on here - rather than medicating them with anti-depressants (if there is no underlying deep cause for the depression mentioned by some women).

Look at the section on the above menu labelled Treatments and ask away - and yes - CHANGE YOUR GP!!!  That advice is completely incorrect and I am flabbergasted that your GP says it is so long since she prescribed any! How many women is she doing an injustice to through this I wonder?

Also you are only 52 (I think I read). I was still having periods at this age. Look at the section on risks and benefits of HRT here http://www.menopausematters.co.uk/balance.php \ and you will see that under 60 the benefits outweigh the risks.

I agree with resuming a cycle - OK you will have to put up with a bleed and a bit of hormonal up and down again - but if it lifts your mood for most of the time - then it has to be worth it. I am 62 and use a 50 mcg oestrogen patch (Estradot) together with Utrogestan taken 12 days every two months - and this suits me fine - have been on this regime more or less for 9 years.

Go for it - you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Hurdity x

[DownDillie]

Thanks so much Hurdity (and all who have posted) - this forum is so wonderful, such a supportive warm and knowledgeable place.

I have booked an appointment at the same surgery but with a different GP. I will do some more reading up and go in with a more informed and determined attitude this time. I get the impression the whole practice is anti-HRT so if this next visit doesn't work, I shall look for help elsewhere. There doesn't seem to be a menopause specialist there - probably because they want you to just 'get on with it'.

I don't mind having a monthly bleed again if it means my moods stay more stable - these very low moods are very scary and it's very hard to talk myself out of them, primarily because they seem to originate in a physical way. God, I'm so mixed up at the moment.

I am taking other steps to improve my well-being as well but I do think HRT is the way to go. Will do a lot more reading over the weekend.

Thanks again, it is such a relief to unburden myself to people who understand  .

[Hurdity]

If the whole practice is anti HRT then they are doing women a disservice and if they lack the expert knowledge and unbiased view then they are duty bound to refer you to somewhere/someone that does. You can see if there is a menopause clinic in your area by looking under "Specialists" (very top menu in blue).

Good luck with the different doc and keep us posted

Hurdity x

[DownDillie]

Hi again everyone,

I've been lucky and have just had another couple of 'good' days - if life was always like this I would not be going down the HRT route at all  . What this has confirmed to me is that these low moods are not depression.

With regard to HRT, I saw a different GP earlier in the week. She was not terribly well-up on the bio-identical HRT options but I said that I would like to try Oestrogel and Utrogestan. She has suggested that as it's such a long time since I've had a period it would be a better idea to try continuous HRT to begin with. She was very happy to prescribe whatever I thought would suit me and spent a couple of days looking at options so she was clear on what was appropriate.

I've agreed to try Oestrogel (Sandrena sachets) and Utrogestan 1mg for 25/28 days. I don't know how I will get on with this but I think it's worth a try. I don't know if I will react badly to Progesterone but I never had any problems when using the contraceptive pill.

If I find this regime doesn't work well I can try changing things but I'm going to give this a go for the next 3 months and then review things. I am going to keep a brief journal keeping track of my moods and general wellbeing so I know how things are working out.

Meanwhile, I am working on Mindfulness to stop myself falling into a pit of despair when I'm feeling down. I have bought: 'Mindfulness: A practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world' by Prof. Mark Williams. This is an eight-week programme with audio recordings of mindfulness meditations to practise. Again, worth a try  .

Let me know if you think the above HRT plan is not a good idea or if you have anything else I need to wary of before setting off on my HRT journey! And can I say a big THANK YOU once again to everyone who has replied on this thread - all the advice and support has been invaluable and I am so grateful.

[Audreyhaffenden]

Hi downdillie
I've only just joined this forum today and read your post.  I don't have any words of wisdom or if I did I've forgotten them lol. Just wanted to give you a big hug (hug ) xxx
It's so good to have somewhere to come to and have likeminded people to discuss menopause symptoms with and feel "normal" instead of thinking you're going a bit loopy xxx
I'm sure you will get there in the end , just keep talking about it and asking for help whenever you feel up to it and wherever you can xx

[Hurdity]

Hi Downdillie

Sorry I've only just read your post - haven't been on the forum much recently due to being away and busy!

Firstly brilliant news that you've managed to get oestrogel and utrogestan!! What a breakthrough - I presume you have started the HRT by now? What I would have suggested would be to start low ie with less than one sachet (not sure how much you have been prescribed - because as it's 3 years since your last period your body has been starved of oestrogen. Then gradually bild up if necessary. I also would have suggested starting with a cycle only to get used to the oestrogen before introducing the progesterone. However I can understand why the doc suggested continuous combined - although you might get some breakthrough bleeding initially especially if use a higher dose of oestrogen.

Hopefully you will begin to feel better physically as each week goes by and then you will be mentally better able to cope with the difficulties you mentioned earlier and able to make a plan of what to do next while you are feeling more upbeat?

Please let us know how you are getting on and sorry your post got missed! There are  so many  - when I come onto the forum I probably only get to about a quarter of them randomly!

Hurdity x

[clare663]

Hi Downdilley

You are discribing me to a t!! Have not had a period for 3 years and very suddenly my moods went downhill and I got anxious!!  Went to the GP who put me on Evorel conti patches. Had my ups and downs on them and now wanting to switch to non synthetic type as my moods have plumeted again. Let me know how you get on with what the gp prescribed for you please.

[DownDillie]

Firstly brilliant news that you've managed to get oestrogel and utrogestan!! What a breakthrough - I presume you have started the HRT by now? What I would have suggested would be to start low ie with less than one sachet (not sure how much you have been prescribed - because as it's 3 years since your last period your body has been starved of oestrogen. Then gradually bild up if necessary. I also would have suggested starting with a cycle only to get used to the oestrogen before introducing the progesterone. However I can understand why the doc suggested continuous combined - although you might get some breakthrough bleeding initially especially if use a higher dose of oestrogen.

Thanks for the reply Hurdity. I've had the HRT meds sitting in their boxes in my bedroom but have not tried them yet. For some reason, I got cold feet about  it. But I decided once and for all that I don't want to go on feeling like this. The tension and anxiety is like a physical pain that I can't relieve. I'm going to give it a try starting today.

I will follow your advice about the reduced dose of oestrogen first. I will try half a sachet in the mornings or possibly 1/4 a sachet each morning and evening, though it won't be easy to regulate that dose. But if I do one sachet over two days, that should work. As for the progesterone, I will try what the doctor suggested for now and see how I feel.

Hopefully you will begin to feel better physically as each week goes by and then you will be mentally better able to cope with the difficulties you mentioned earlier and able to make a plan of what to do next while you are feeling more upbeat?

Please let us know how you are getting on and sorry your post got missed! There are  so many  - when I come onto the forum I probably only get to about a quarter of them randomly!

Hurdity x

Please don't apologise Hurdity, it's amazing how much help you give on these forums and I for one am very grateful for your advice. I hope that, as you say, once I start feeling better I will be able to cope with dealing with the rest of my life's difficulties.

Thanks so much.
x

[DownDillie]

Hi Downdilley

You are discribing me to a t!! Have not had a period for 3 years and very suddenly my moods went downhill and I got anxious!!  Went to the GP who put me on Evorel conti patches. Had my ups and downs on them and now wanting to switch to non synthetic type as my moods have plumeted again. Let me know how you get on with what the gp prescribed for you please.

Hi Clare,

Sorry to hear you are having the same horrible moods and anxiety, it's hard to deal with isn't it?

I am about to start the HRT today - I will definitely be back to let everyone know how I get on. I really really hope that it works.

I am also going to start an 8-week mindfulness meditation programme (from a book) to see if that helps me prevent the spirals of despair, as I expect the HRT to take a while to kick in.

And I am going to make a more concerted effort to eat healthily and in particular avoid sugary and refined carbs. I know from past experience that I generally feel much better when I eat properly. Likewise, more exercise is needed.

This may mean that if I feel better I won't know 100% what has done it - but I don't care, I just want to feel better  .

x

[clare663]

Hi DownDillie, following my message to you a week or so ago, I am happy to report that my side effects have really improved. Still feel slightly anxious, at worst when I wake up, but not on a daily basis. My mood has lifted considerably too. What HRT did your Dr put you on in the end?

[Hurdity]

Sounds like a good plan DownDillie - keep us posted .

Hurdity x