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[Suzi Q]

Womens Institute
Charity shops (I do that) and look in to that first I went from shop to shop looking at the clothes
Looking at the people listening to the music they played in the shop superficial maybe but I had to know Id like it
Vol in hospitals nearly every hospital of a decent size has a Volun oprganisation usually in phone book or ring hospital
I did that for 4 years 12/4 Tue and Thur you meet greet people take them to wards xray you name it
You chat to people who are scared  try to take their mind off things for a moment or 2 its a really great Vol work
I looked for vol work where I would be with people not alone I do 1 afternoon a week at Lifeline(SAmaritans)
In a month or so Im upping it to 2 afternoon a week I really enjoy it meet everyone from 1week old babies to 90 year old ladies and you serve them you help them find things that suits them Then theres also MOWheels if you drive
Check your library if you get a child card you can see if you can do story telling but you have to have the card

[Bette]

Thank you all very much for your ideas; very useful.
What I need most of all is to find a way to come to terms with this but I'm hoping that finding productive things to occupy myself will help. My work has always been the most important thing to me after close family and friends (in fact, nearly all my friends are work colleagues); it's a vocation, an artistic and emotional outlet and a hobby all rolled into one. I've always lived to work rather than worked to live, if I'm honest and have never seen any problem with that. It doesn't help that OH is in the same profession so we've always shared it all. Happily he's still getting plenty of work and that shouldn't change but that's another challenge as he wants to share it with me all the time and I have to fight not to feel a bit jealous. I know that this is a small problem compared to what others have to deal with but it feels pretty big to me at the moment. Feeling very small-minded, selfish and weepy right now. 
Bette x

[CLKD]

It's OK.  Any change is difficult, even when we want it.  Accepting that the job you do now is lacking for you and that you need to change tack might take a week or two, however, in hindsight all my jobs have opened windows onto others.  No way did I think my work journey would turn out as it did.  A couple of jobs I ought to have walked from within a few days but I hung on  , others I would have liked to continue but we moved away.  Hard at the time but often I think we get into a rut so lose opportunity to expland and explore 

[Limpy]

Bette - don't feel bad you've not had a good year, it's bound to take it's toll.
As CLKD says any change if difficult, just try and relax and find out what you want to do

[Lucky Stone]

You are in no way selfish Bette, just a bit down at the moment. You need to be kind to yourself - after all you wouldn't be impatient with a friend who feels like you do at the moment, would you? I think we can all be our own worst critics. Hang in there 

[Suzi Q]

If hubbie wants you take it accept with good grace and love he evidently loves you to bits girl your lucky
Lifes shite at times we all go through times were we tihnk why me what the heck have I done and with meno OH and not forgetting me 15 years postmeno who still gets hot flkushes still cries and feels useless yet Im not I know that
Just when bad things happen sometimes we find it hard to manage we look back and say I did that why not now
My job ib Daycare finished Dec 15th 2011 it was great for a few weeks then horrible felt old and yuky
Thing was my back was bad really bad and I also didnt want to do a years course so head held high I left
My backs still rubbish no change there I still get sad not depression well i dont thnk its depression but maybe it is?
Rest breath and think what youd like to do it makes it worse doesnt it you lived for work as did I
Bit like girls who are pretty with age loose their looks they feel it 1000 times more than the every day women

[Elena]

Hello Bette

so sorry to hear of your losses.  I know what you mean about getting yourself out of the house/keeping busy as I am the same.  How about asking if the library need couriers to take books to Housebound people?  Just a thought. 

You are not being selfish at all.  You've had a horrible time so take care of yourself.

Can you join a daytime Yoga group or a walking group?  Something for you that you would enjoy.

hugs

Milliemoo

[Katy]

Bette I am so sorry to hear of your losses it can be hard to bear at times.  I had also noticed that you hadn't posted for a while - you're usually one of the first to welcome new members.  It's horrible when you're feeling so down you think that you'll never get back up again but you will given time.

Katy x

[Soupdragon]

Hi Bette,
Very sorry to hear of your loss (we had to let our dog go just before xmas and even tho we know it was the right thing to do it bloody hurts like crazy).
If you are an "Outdoor" type of person then perhaps you'd be interested in volunteering at your local Riding for the Disabled Association. (easy to search for online). My experiences in doing so have only been positive. You don't have to be "horsey" as they provide training if you want; it's very relaxed in terms of the commitment they require (as much or as little as you are able to give). The physical activity helps with my low moods as does being around and looking after the horses, and of course, it's nice to be involved with the disabled riders too.
I understand it isn't everyone's cup of tea but I thought I'd mention it as many people are unaware of this particular volunteering opportunity.

[jax]

Hi Bette...so sorry to hear your news...
I had thought the other day I hadnt seen you around on here but some how this thread had passed me by :-( only found out when the "Bette" thread came up...
Its difficult when work starts dying up...I am self employed too and have seen a decline in work in the last 3 months,,,That in itself is worrying but also adds to the general meno down hill struggle to face up to our changeing roles in life...Sorry..I am rambling on but I mean well!
I think with last summer being so wet and now winter, a lot of us are feeling generally down (vit D deficient?) The sun is shining today and i am trying to drag myself out of my cant be bothered mood that has swamped me for a few weeks now. I would normally jump at the chance to go for a cycle...day off, sun shining, no commitments to prevent me but here I am sat in a chair with a lap top...
I am going to go and do it now....will check in later :-) hugs xx jax

[jax]

update...did 18 miles on a sunny afternoon...really lifted my mood...:-)

[Elena]

Well done Jax.

[CLKD]

Food banks in the News again.  Does anyone volunteer at one or know of any users?

[honeybun]

I think that anyone who uses one would not advertise it to be honest.

We have a food bank in the town I think but apart from donating things I really don't know much about it at all.


Honeyb
x

[Rowan]

The other thing in the News is NHS proposing gastric bands for thirteen year olds, the irony of it!