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[Momo]

Hello Ladies
just wanted to post as i am feeling so low and want to have a whinge in a friendly place. Am about to go through a very busy time at work, travelling a little bit around the County running demos and engaging with staff where i have to be upbeat and positive all day but what i really want to do is scream and hide under the desk and just want it all to go away. I start a new job with a different team on 1st March, but so want to start that job that i really am not loving the one i am leaving. I know i only have to hold on a few days longer.

Some of it is anxiety that i have always had, and I worry about whether i will be able to do the new job, which is a promotion, but now it feels magnified. I  came off the HRT at New Year and was happy that i haven't had a migraine since early January, which is good, as i usually get one every 2 weeks. So there are positives out there. But could my current mood be because the hormones have taken a dip?

For the last week i just want to lie down and not speak or interact with anyone, assume it is the hormones but why do we get like / this?  I am fed up cooking/cleaning/ working  but having no spirit to exercise or eat healthily which is what i need to to stay make sure my mental health stays in a positive zone, but some days it feels like there is no point and fear that one day at work or home i will just end up a screaming mess as some poor sod who just gets in the way.

Hubby is supportive, but doesn't really get that mentally i am in such a negative place, all i want to do is lie on the sofa and drink until my brain switches off or eat until i am sick or  cry until i have something else to think about, isn't that a terrible thing?

I know so many of us go through this, and i know it will pass, but boy is today a stinker.

sending positive vibes and love to anyone else who needs it today

thanks for reading

Momo

[Mindfulmoomins]

Having a stinker of a day too so just wanted to say hello and you are not alone. You do whatever helps you today. Kind wishes xxxxx

[Sgtvhilts]

Oh bless you.
I have had a life long love affair with low mood and anxiety. I am At the point these days where I'm quite philosophical about it, although on dark days it still feels awful, i know it will pass.
What you've got going on at work is enough to send anyone into a tailspin.

I have recently gone through what i refer to as a spaghetti head- where all thoughts are racing around, but make no sense- as usual it has passed now, but night sweats are dreadful.
Hormones, lack of, to much of etc are responsible for a lot of our ills- why did you quit HRT .
My husband too is very supportive, but bless them, they just don't get it.
My advice for what its worth- is it is okay to have cra*py times, such is life, but whatever the cause it usually passes, but for godness sake stop trying to be perfect, just be kind to yourself

[CLKD]

Why should they 'get it'  .  It's enough for them to be supportive, sit down: talk to them: explain how they can help: that this isn't their fault [well not every day  ]

HORMONES  .  How were you pre-menstrually, did you get low days prior to a bleed?  I would cry 24 hours prior to my period then mood would lift.

Many find that they are no longer able to do the job they love, because it's all too much.  So don't beat yourself up.  Are you anxious prior to each outing and does that anxiety ease once you get going?

Do I need to tell you that alcohol is a depressant?  Maybe you need to make a note of your alcohol requirement through the week and see if there is a pattern that needs altering? 

[paisley]

I  felt the same yesterday as well. What is it about Sunday's, always make me feel worse. The comfort I get is knowing it will pass. I definitely think that stopping the hrt would have an effect. I stopped mine 9 months ago & still have symptoms plus you have a lot on your plate at the moment

[Hurdity]

Hi Momo

Sorry to hear you arw feeling down. What are your periods doing - have you had one since stopping HRT or is it too soon to tell? If your periods are few and far between then your low mood could well be due to low oestrogen and I would try to find an HRT that is less liley to cause migraines. Which type were you on before?

As for the alcohol - if working I would restrict this to Friday and Saturday and you will be amazed at how much more alert you feel during the day - although one very small drink early in the evening might have a beneficial relaxing effect as long as you stay well within the recommended limits.

Try to look forward to your new job and new team and think yourself into that place in 9 days time - and you will get through the next week or so.

See if you can find a way to restart the HRT (a different type?) if you feel this was beneficial for your mood?

Hurdity x

[CLKD]

Many ladies find that they develop an intolerance to alcohol at peri or even that it upsets them a lot.

[Momo]

Hi Ladies
thanks for all the kind words. It is great to know that we are all here for each other.

I am hopeful my dark mood will pass, I only usually drink on a Saturday, actually before this week i hadn't drunk for 6 weeks, i had two glasses of wine and a vodka and tonic, hardly a mega bender! But I am reducing my drinking at the moment as i think it does effect my mood adversely, maybe it does as i felt so low yesterday??
It is just harder to fight the urge some days than others. I can't drink during the week anymore , not if i want to function at work anyway
I did get out for a run this morning and i know that helps. i just have to accept that exercise is what keeps me feeling mentally well and get out there as much as i can.

i just needed to moan yesterday and felt better once i had it down on the internet.

 i stopped HRT because i haven't found one that worked, without giving me horrendous migraines, working with my GP we tried all sorts but nothing has worked. I had the same problem with contraception, migraine,  terrible black moods and acne, i tried loooong list of different types, but in the end i just got steralized to save all the hassle.
In the end the Doc couldn't really suggest any other HRT that she thought might work, she suggested Eustrogen??? - may have mis-
 remembered this, but i thought i would take a break to see what happens. I expect the job has a lot to do with me feeling stressed.

I haven't had any bleeding since Christmas Day and even then it was little more than a spot, I think the moods are similar to PMT so  i am not suprised that i feel like this.

just need to hang in there , thanks for all the kind thoughts
and hope the days get better for anyone else who needs it  too.
x
Momo

[Chocolatemilkshake]

Just sending you hugs and to say I struggle too with my mood.... even I'm fed up with me being miserable 😂

[CLKD]

   even though I take ADs some days I feel low.  Worse on dull days at this time of year because I can't get outside in our garden.

How is your diet over-all Momo?

[Hurdity]

Are you able to ask for a referral to a menopause specialist (maybe there is an NHS clinic within 50 miles of you?) who would be better able to help you find an HRT which would work despite your migraines, and lift your mood?

Hurdity x

[Poppi]

Hi Momo, hope you are feeling a bit better today? I've no advice but  as I know how you feel.

Your husband sounds like mine and how you feel about him sounds like me - they are great some/most of the time but "Men from Mars, women from wherever (can't remember)" is how they are I think. Do you have a gay (man) friend? I have one (a family friend who knows us both) and he is wonderful at understanding and encouragement! With Mr P and I right now it's a problem with me not getting up as early as him (him at 8ish, I'd be happier nearer 9 when we have nothing to get up for but compromise for 8.30) I'm quite happy to have breakfast alone but what a song and dance he makes about it. Then I feel guilty when he does something nice for me - "Life is a Rollercoaster" was never so true.

One wee thought - nothing bad lasts for ever 

  Poppi x

[CLKD]

Mr P will get over it  .  As long as he isn't noisy in the kitchen whilst you lay abed  otherwise.  ?     ?

A little bit of peace first thing is to be enjoyed.  We often don't speak once we've decided what to eat ;-)

[Momo]

thanks for all the kind thoughts ladies. I am feeling better this week, just kept buggering on and got out in the sunshine yesterday, so that always helps. Even though my toes went numb in my wellie boots!

My diet is pretty good overall, lost about 5 stone in the last few years, so that made me feel better. I try and get out running but having to travel for work to other sites beggars that up a bit as it means getting up at 5 am which is a bit too early, especially when it is parky:) , but only  3 more days to go in this job and 2 more site visits. Nearly there, just got to keep smiling.

Sorry to hear about those of your that do struggle , hubby is incredibly supportive really, he bought me a sunlight lamp that comes on to wake me up gently, headphones that are a headband and very comfy so i can lie and listen to my mindfulness podcasts when the insomnia is raging and lots of lovely warm running gear, plus he does listen when i bleat on, but he admits he can't comprehend how i feel inside my own head because he hasn't been through it.

i would agree with all the comments, that say that these things do pass and that is what i hold onto when it all feels very dark and miserable inside my head. Then i look outside on a day like today, when the sky is icy blue and the sun is shining and i feel so glad that i am around to see it.

take care everyone and sending out those positive vibes....

Momo

[CLKD]

Slow down.  Take time to sniff the roses ;-).  Well done on the weight loss!!     I know that I need to walk more etc. but it's easier not to do so.  Miss having a  , we had to go out in those days  .

At this time of year there is plenty to watch in the hedgerows as leaves un-furl.  I try to stand, watch, listen for 10 mins. every day and the birds are SO noisy right now  - may Spring has sprung. 

Are you changing your job soon?