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[gayedwards]

  Love my husband soo much and he really is a wonderful man hes supported me through breast cancer 15 years ago now but I woulkd never have done it without him and weve had a lovely sex life all our married life until I started the menapause 5 years ago .....Im now so dry down below there is no chance at all of penetrative sex and I miss the contact we do other thigs and both enjoy them but theres nothing like the connection .We have talked about it and my husband says hes happy to carry on as we are because to him its not important because he loves me , but I feel like im losing all my feminity I just want what we had or as close as we can get x I cant have hrt for obvious reasons and ive tried all kinds of lubricants and ive also tried vagifem pesseries with creams but althiough some moisture returned it was still very hard going I know theres no magic wand but just wondered if theres something Ive not tried and if anyone has any yseful advice X

[Jenna]

Hi gayedwards,

 

Have you ever had Yes water-based lubricant prescribed by your GP? If not, then perhaps you might like to look at the yesyesyes.org website, as there is a great deal of very useful information there.

I hope this helps! 

[MicheleMaBelle]

Hi - there's an article on VA in this months Menopause Matters magazine ( you can download online)
Hope you find it interesting- it talks about the issues one of our lovely ladies has had.
https://menopausematters.co.uk/magazine/

It might be worth sending a private message?
X

[ancient runner]

There is a member on here called Maryjane who has had awful VA problems and has undergone a laser treatment called the Mona Lisa Touch which was originally for women who had BC history and couldn't use HRT - could be worth finding out more? She has written a thread on it.

[Hurdity]

Hi gayedwards

  from me too.

I am so sorry to hear about your difficulties as a result of breast cancer. In addition to what the others have said, just to say also that there are other women who are prescribed vaginal oestrogen even though they have had breast cancer - under supervision so your specialist may continue to prescribe it. This does need to be kept up though - so when you say you've tried it - I'm not sure from your post whether you have stopped it or not and if you have I am wondering why? Unfortunately VA only improves for as long as treatment continues.  I do hope you manage to find a suitable treatment to ease things for you.

Hurdity x

[gayedwards]

Thankyou for  your  welcome to the site ladies ,in reply to Hurdity i have tried the pessaries twice the last time using them for about 3 months but I found that although the problem eased slightly full penetration was still dreadfully painful do you think I just need to carry on maybe I was too impatient one of the reasons I wwas put off is my hair seemed to get thinner and its quite fine to start with when I read the side effects this was one of them so decided to stop ....think I a lost cause :-(

[CLKD]

The idea of localised oestrogen is to 'load' every night for 2 weeks then use 'as necessary'.  Some ladies find that they require other lubricants too, I use KY Jelly, some ladies find others more suitable.  Breast disease shouldn't rule out HRT totally as there is little chance of up-take via the vagina. Quality of Life is important.

Do listen to your husband.  Don't load yourself with guilt !  Do what is necessary to remain connected   

I have been prescribed Ovestin successfully.

[Dancinggirl]

Hi gayedwards
Vagifem oestrogen would be good for you and this needs to be used regularly to be effective - virtually none is absorbed systemically so should not increase risk of BC. It is also highly unlikely to cause the hair thinning.
Local moisturiser is also essential - I love using SYLK but many love the YES products. These vaginal moisturisers can be used all the time and are great for keeping things comfortable.
When having sex - well lots of extra lubrucation is the only way - I find a silicone gel really great - For me Perfect Glide by Durex is fabulous as it lasts longer and improves the whole experience ( I have to buy this online).
Good luck. DG x

[Suzi Q]

Love my husband soo much and he really is a wonderful man hes supported me through breast cancer 15 years ago now but I woulkd never have done it without him and weve had a lovely sex life all our married life until I started the menapause 5 years ago .....Im now so dry down below there is no chance at all of penetrative sex and I miss the contact we do other thigs and both enjoy them but theres nothing like the connection .We have talked about it and my husband says hes happy to carry on as we are because to him its not important because he loves me , but I feel like im losing all my feminity I just want what we had or as close as we can get x I cant have hrt for obvious reasons and ive tried all kinds of lubricants and ive also tried vagifem pesseries with creams but althiough some moisture returned it was still very hard going I know theres no magic wand but just wondered if theres something Ive not tried and if anyone has any yseful advice X

Nope vagifem is still the best but its not a cure. If your moist inside but haven't had regular lovey dovey your bound to be tight and that tightness causes pain
Plus even with vagifem most cant carry on as long as the movements can cause the walls to dry. So imo use it ok even if its just in out a few times then what ever rings hubbies bell
You will find it opens you up stretching you and each time gets more pain free.
For me with Atrophy its never been the same My hubbie said exactly what yours did.
But i pushed too hard he then started to have erectile problems he was scared to hurt me
Weve sorted that out hes ok now but hes aware he cant go too long.  Marriage or long life relationships is more than sex its cuddles kisses hugs holding hands i love yous doing things together walks talking both looking good for each other whoopy doo is great
But love is far greater

[Jane1970]

I'm having same problems with sore dry I've had breast cancer so not on hrt and I'm new to this site I get scared what's happening to me and would like to talk to others about things x

[CLKD]

Hi!  vaginal atrophy and bladder issues - two threads to read to get ideas as to what might B causing your symptoms and the appropriate treatments that are available.

Don't write off HRT even with your history, quality of life is important. Some find that keeping a mood/food/symptom diary useful.  As oestrogen levels drop off the body may become dry: inside and out - skin, scalp, feet, deep in the ears, nostrils, eyes as well as the vaginal area.  Also, muscles may become lax = aches and pains.

Browse round 

[Joaniepat]

I'm having same problems with sore dry I've had breast cancer so not on hrt and I'm new to this site I get scared what's happening to me and would like to talk to others about things x

Hello Jane1970, welcome to the forum.

You can ask your GP for local oestrogen treatment such as Vagifem or Ovestin. A full list of options is available on the Treatments section of the main menu. The oestrogen is not absorbed systemically so they should have no problem prescribing it. You can also use a decent vaginal moisturiser such as one of the Yes products - have a look at their website.

I recommend you join the Vaginal Atrophy Facebook support group (a private group) where you will find the best advice and support for VA.

JP x

[Seidbh]

Just read that sea buckthorn oil tabs can work.

[CLKD]

Hi Seidbh - where did you read that info.? 

Appropriate VA treatment is necessary on a regular basis.

[Postmeno3]

Yes, can validate the Sea Buckthorn to partially help. I understand breast cancer treatment can cause a more extreme dryness so you need very specific, informed info and methods. In my phone consultation with the menopause clinic specialist, I was told to use the oil-based YES on myself and the water-based on him. Have you approached the gp for a referral to a menopause clinic? You might want to e-mail Dr. Currie on here, directions are at the top on the black bar. It costs, but is worth it. Good luck.