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[warwick01]

This is such a good topic. Anxiety in my opinion is a lonely business. Nobody apart from you ladies seem to understand how bad things can be. I even scare myself with the irrational thoughts that pop in my head (all part of anxiety)

I know I must force myself to go out but the jelly legs, panic are so intense it scares the hell out of me

GRL - yes I suffered at 18 after having my first baby. I had no one to turn too, my mum made me leave home and my partner at the time was not interested in me or my baby. He left soon after, leaving me to survive on my own. I never told anyone as I was scared I would have my baby taken away. No one ever eared of post natal depression 38 years ago. I came through it then so hoping I survive this time Although this does feel a lot worse.

Thank goodness for you ladies, some days I think this must be mental illness and understand why ladies were locked away in years gone by.......... Thank goodness people now can see a link to hormones.

Oh well tomorrow is another day!!

Wxx

[Unhinged]

I agree Warwick, I'm only new but already I feel this is the one place where I can talk openly about the anxiety - even my nearest and dearest who would support me whatever I have, cannot understand like we all do simply because they have not experienced it themselves. I find it such a comfort coming in here!

It is the terror isn't it Warwick, having to force yourself to go out, I do because I have to go to work and actually I'm ok with that so long as I keep on going out. I have two days off per week and I have noticed that if I don't go out those days the anxiety becomes worse, so even if I've nothing particular to do I make myself go to the supermarket or something just to make sure I keep going out - even though the jelly legs leave me gripping the shopping trolley handle for dear life! If I stay in for two days I feel myself going into total meltdown mode!

Sounds like you had a terrible time after your baby, you were not treated well!

Even while having my darkest thoughts though, I still believe that one day - maybe when the hormones finally settle - we will be able to move on from the crippling anxiety, or at least see it reduced to a more tolerable level. And you never know, they may even come up with other ways/new meds to help us all! x     

[CLKD]

  -     there are meds available now ………..

I have found Rescue Remedy mouth spray useful in the past, there are pastilles too.

For me the anxiety hits below the belly button and my whole gut area tightens.  Then my thighs to weak followed by total feeling that my legs will collapse.  2nd level of panic begins and I look for a way out.  Psychologists told me to stand and work through it but that has never worked, I have to flee.  Only then am I in any way controlling what I'm doing even if I can't control how I feel!  Then the light-headedness starts  - after all that, once the anxiety lessens, I am OH SO tired.

[Unhinged]

Hi again CLKD, yes we have meds available now and I'm going to try all of them if necessary! But maybe one day there will be a single pill that works instantly on all menopausal/anxious women with no side effects whatsoever and makes us feel like we're 25 again - then I woke up ha ha!

Yeah, I understand what you mean, it hits me in the gut too, that along with the jelly legs, and jelly arms as well for that matter, and makes me want to run - but no idea where to so I just sit and freeze instead. Oh god yes, the sheer exhaustion of it! Talking of which, bedtime, work again tomorrow.

Just to add that I too have Rescue Remedy spray, bought it in desperation not imagining that it would make the slightest bit of difference - I was amazed that it does actually help a bit, sort of takes the edge off. Night night all, hope you have a good dry sleep!

[warwick01]

Hi - with me, I can drive to the supermarket, then as soon as I get out of the car I start to feel giddy, then the what if's then the jelly legs, feel like a poker going through my stomach. I push myself watching all other people relaxed putting their shopping in the trolley, me I run around leaving as quickly as I can. Once, only a few weeks ago I ran out of Aldi because standing in the long queue was intolerable

I gave up work because of this and often wonder if it was right decision as I have become more isolated.

Its good to know Im not alone

W

[babyjane]

I have an arrangement to take my friend out for coffee on wednesday and I am already thinking of cancelling it although there really is no reason to do so.  What is that all about then?  I will not cancel it, but I want to 

[CLKD]

Yep, I'm like that too.  No longer bother making arrangements, will go out spontaneously though.

Warwick - you did the correct thing at the time!  I tend to shop when it's quieter, I never allow the pantry to run down so I don't back myself into a corner. 

I curl up into a ball when really anxious until the med. works.  I want to run but where to 

[honeybun]

Running is so the wrong thing to do. It reinforces the feelings that there is something to be scared of.
I found it the hardest thing, just to stand there when everything in my head was screaming to get out.
I used to go with hubby, if I couldn't stand in the queue then I would go for a short wander leaving hubby with the trolley and then go back. I would also get my phone out and look at photos just to distract myself. I did it over and over and eventually my brain accepted nothing bad had happened and wasn't likely to. I still have wobbles but just keep plugging away.

Please don't run or it will never improve.


Honeyb
X

[warwick01]

Anxiety........ I know it's so wrong to run but I feel intense fear of fainting in front of people. I worry about what people think of me, I guess that's my problem

Saying that the symptoms are real.......... esp the light-headedness I feel, I am sure if I didn't have the physical symptoms I would progress.

Your comments really help Wx

[SadLynda]

Wow, all I can say is 'yes, me too'.

I have just had my nettle tea and its awful, had sage tea this morning?? now I am turning into a health freak in an effort to feel better before my appointments, 'Unhinged' my first post was then, now like many here I really dont care.. I am taking a barage of natural remedies to just try keep my sane till I can see what is what.

My Mum had a hysterectomy at age 40 and was 'left to it' I was young then so no idea what she went through, she was telling me today and how of course there was no information for them, they just went by what the doctor said

I also had post natal depression 24 years ago and spent a few years on AD's, then again during my divorce.. I dont really want to go there again.

oh yes, anxiety and not going out.. tick that box too.

[CLKD]

Once I flee I'm in control again.  I used to walk briskly but numbly back to the car where DH would eventually find me.  The anxiety would begin on the way to town, a journey of 15 miles  ….. sometimes I was unable to get out of the car.

Light headedness follows quite soon after the legs go wobbly, then I'm really stuffed !  Once I got to town this morning though I was OK, there's no rhyme nor reason.  If I could have 1 issue that made me anxious then I could cope better but it is so random 

[babyjane]

'No longer bother making arrangements, will go out spontaneously though'.


^ this is so true.  I make arrangements when I feel ok and by the time they come round I don't feel ok any more 

[Taz2]

Same with me - really difficult to make arrangements due to the ever present risk of a panic happening. I was pleased with myself yesterday though as I went to a family meet-up which involved a 300 mile round trip - something that I used to love doing. I didn't know whether I was going until the last minute so didn't even tell anyone I was on my way. I was the Surprise Guest!    Had a few panics while I was there and especially on the journey. I find the halfway point the worst as there's as far to go as there is to get home. So daft. I left there at 8.00 and I just made it back in time for a glass of wine in the pub to toast my success. Felt really pleased with myself for doing something that used to be second nature. Sigh.

Taz x

[warwick01]

Well done Taz that is a real achievement!

Wx

[Unhinged]

Oh my, a NEW THING! I have just finished work, have been perfectly fine all day, I honestly haven't even thought about anxiety, then, driving the few miles home I started feeling anxious thinking about making my dinner and doing the laundry! Why on earth would that be!?! It makes no sense at all, but it was strong enough for me to decide that I would do laundry in the morning and I stopped at McDonalds (oh gawd) to pick up dinner. Now the pressure is off I feel ok again. Maybe that's it - that I knew I 'had' to do something, hadn't given myself the choice and it put pressure on. Even if that's right, how can such a small thing make me feel pressured? Is there a psychiatrist in the house ha ha!