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[Cass63]

Hello Ladies,
Hope everyone is well, as well as can be during this time. Just a little history about me, I am from the US, will be turning 61 in September, had a total hysterectomy in 2011, everything removed because of severe endometriosis, never taken HRT, was told I could only take oral HRT 3 to 5 years after the hysterectomy, preferably only 3 years because of cancer risk, was told I would go into full blown menopause once I stopped taking the HRT so I decided not to take it, only used estradiol cream since my hysterectomy, afib started in 2016 which I have had 3 heart ablations and on heart medicine to keep it under control. I have never smoked or drank, always tried to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I have had symptoms since my 40’s, but in my late 50’s it seemed the symptoms were more manageable, never completely gone, but more manageable. Fast forward to early last year, it seemed as if every symptom there is kicked in on steroids. I have dealt with anxiety since this all started, but was always able to manage it. The last year and a half it seems to be managing me. Health anxiety is super bad, seems I just don’t handle nothing well these days, didn’t used to be this way. There are days of crying for no reason, just feeling lost and for lack of a better way to describe it, homesick. The last year and a half has been my worst time since it all started in 2009. I am convinced that whatever little bit of hormones I had left bottomed out. Seems like everyday it’s something different going on with me. I am blessed above and beyond what I deserve and don’t mean to murmur or complain, just gets overwhelming sometimes. Will things ever completely settle down or is this how the last phase of some women’s lives are? Will there be highs and lows from here on, decent days and more not so decent days?  I was always lead to think by this age I would be through this, I would get my second wind, I was told 🙃 I now seem to be dealing with VA and bladder issues and have a husband who still requires sex. Just seems there is no end to this. How do you all find acceptance during this transition? I am a woman of faith, I pray and believe in JESUS. I know my faith has been my saving grace, but some days I just feel so worn out. Sorry so long a post, but was just wondering how you ladies cope, how you found acceptance in all of this.
Thanks for listening 🙂

[CLKD]

Hi!  regardless of Faith, many of us go through similar issues as peri-menopause begins.  Those years prior to the final period = menopause, when hormone levels rise and fall.

Health anxiety is a biggy for many women at this stage.  Some find that keeping a mood/food/symptom of use to chart progress. 

Browse round.  Make notes.  If you had total hysterectomy you will have gone into menopause anyway. 

How is your health need managed, do U have private insurance over there?  We have an NHS system but it's more difficult to get a GP due to retirement, population growth and waiting lists for most issues. 

Keep on the with vaginal atrophy treatment, there are lots++ of threads about this.  It requires regular treatment as you are probably aware, with more occasionally i.e. every night if symptoms niggle.

There are many ways of keeping partners happy ;-)  than penetration. 

[bombsh3ll]

Hi Cass63,

Sorry to hear of the difficulties you are having but you have come to the right place for support.

The information you were given in 2011 is outdated and incorrect.

IF hormone therapy poses ANY increased risk of cancer, and that has only been suggested by very old studies using preparations that are no longer used, and there is much debate even around the interpretation of those results, but let's assume worst case scenario that is correct, then the increase in risk is statistically minuscule.

Please make an appointment with someone who specialises in the care of menopausal/postmenopausal women, and hear what they have to say about the options available to you.

I don't know much about the US insurance system but you may have to pay out of pocket for either the consult and or the prescriptions, as do many of us here in the UK, in order to get the correct treatment for you, however if that's the case it can be the best money you ever spent as your health and quality of life is worth it.

Nobody can promise that hormone therapy or any other treatment will definitely take away all of your symptoms, but getting the appropriate medical care significantly improves the odds of feeling at least some way better, rather than doing nothing.

I too am a Christian and sometimes our prayers are answered in ways we don't expect - you have been guided to this forum today to join a community of different women all dealing with our own issues, and I pray for healing in my life and am totally happy for God to work through human hands and human science to do that.

I hope you can get the relief you need.

And btw nobody REQUIRES sex!!! Your husband needs to be more compassionate for starters 😉

[sheila99]

You moan away, we've all here because we've had a hard time so we completely understand. Some people find symptoms resolve, for others they're lifelong. No way of knowing which it will be for you. I'd recommend you see a menopause specialist, not a gynae who often know nothing about meno. After food and shelter the next most important thing to spend money on is your health. Transdermal hrt is so much safer than the old horse urine oral type it's usually safe to take it for life if you need it. Your symptoms sound like meno to me but perhaps have a look at the Advice for Husbands pinned post where you may find others you hadn't associated with meno. I had anxiety too, it's been completely cured by hrt, my life was hardly worth living without it. I haven't found acceptance and i hope i never have to, I've found hrt instead. They'll be taking it out of my cold, dead hand  .

[CLKD]

not soon though sheila99 ?

[sheila99]

I hope not!

[CLKD]

PHEW!   Anxiety is my most difficult issue, when I feel sudden ill I wonder whether it's worth it  .  'The Change' - does what it says on the tin.  And some!

[sheila99]

Anxiety and insomnia were my worst. I didn't really understand just how debilitating anxiety can be until I had it.

[CLKD]

I've had anxiety since the age of 3.  Think it is related to moving from a family of 6 to me with my parents who then began to argue  .  Although I was able to enjoy drama because I could dissipate any anxiety, these days it can take over.  Every day of feeling well is a bonus 4 me.

[Cass63]

I too agree the anxiety is by far my worst symptom and now the health anxiety has really amped up😢
I keep praying things will eventually settle down.  I don’t expect to be what I was 10 years ago, I know that is not possible nor do I expect it to be, but just to be a little more normal these days would be nice 🙃
Thank you ladies for your support.
Y’all take care 🙂

[Emmia49]

Hello Cass63!

I am 48 and just starting my perimenopause journey and it is very very difficult. I have terrible anxiety, night flushes and terrible insomnia. I can't even function.

I tried HRT and it just wasn't for me and it didn't work either.

I decided to go the AD route and I'm currently suffering from the introduction of AD for 2 weeks.

I will probably never accept this transition as something positive or natural.

I just don't understand this suffering. I am a successful educated woman, always self-confident, but now I don't recognize myself.

What is this for? What is the point of this? I do not understand.
 
In my country, I'm from Slovenia (Europe), they don't prescribe HRT to women over 60, as there is said to be a risk of dementia. I don't know if this is true, but it says so in the HRT leaflet.

Have you considered using AD?

I wish you all the best and that you feel better soon!

[KarineT]

Hi Cass63,

Everyone is different but I truly believe that the menopause is a phase.  The symptoms should start fading to eventually disappear because the body, in my view, is adaptable.  I cannot see why a very low level of oestrogen should continue to cause problems.  It can't be a forever thing.  Like you, I've never been on HRT and I reached the menopause in January 2020; I.e.I had my very last period then.  I've been postmenopausal for just over 4 years now and I feel slightly better.  I only wish that the menopause started later though.  I will be 54 in October and I was still 49 when I reached it  I believe that once the oestrogen level has reached its lowest level then how much lower can it get?  It can't get lower than the lowest level and continue to cause symptoms. By which time, the body should have adapted to it's new oestrogen level.

[Emmia49]

Hi KarineT!

I hope you are right!

I think the same!

Once the hormones stabilize, I think we can expect some relief.

Of course, I don't expect to be exactly the same as I was 10 years ago, but I do expect relief, some new normal period in my life.

 

[sheila99]

I really hope they ease for you but for some women symptoms are lifelong.