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[Elliebee]

Does anyone suffer from bouts of feeling flat, joyless and just fearing the worst ? I am going through this at the moment and it is so draining! I particularly have a fear of getting breast cancer! It hits me in waves with no apparent reason other than hormonal fluctuations!
Does it pass once in menopause?
How do others cope ?

[Ayesha]

It's the dreaded health anxiety caused by the aging process, not just a symptom of the menopause, it's all the other things that go wrong with the body as we age causing us to suffer with immense stress.

You're not alone in this, it can be a nightmare trying to cope with it all!

[EllieJ]

Yes! I am finding myself hit by sudden feelings of despair, mainly about something happening to my husband, wondering how long I have left with him, how I must cherish every second. I envision myself looking back on now after he's gone - its awful and upsets me so much! You are not alone x

[CLKD]

I've worried about DH since B4 we married  [1975].  Even now!

I think it's due to suddenly realising that we are further along the aging process than we would like to be!  Plus our age group having difficulties, dying, long-term illness or getting away from their mundane lives - i.e. going on long holidays etc..

Stop comparing with others - not easy but in all honesty, we can never really tell how others are coping.  They may seem to be ...........

Also as we age we may be caring for elderly parents/neighbours as well as teens 

Why would you get breast disease?  Do U have regular mammograms, do you examine yourself regularly?  I have sudden periods of deep depression which can hit out of the blue, doesn't last more than a few moments: no reason at all. 

Making sure that your diet is good: eating little and often helps me most days!

[Kathleen]

Hello ladies

My trusty Meno book refers to this symptom as 'the dreads' and they are quite common apparently.

Unfortunately I don't have any great insights to offer but perhaps knowing these feelings are due to hormones can offer a little comfort.

Wishing you all well ladies and take care.

K.

[Elliebee]

Thank you ladies. I know I’m not alone feeling like this! I just want my joyful self back !
CLKD I do self exams and attend mammograms (which I dread waiting for the results)! I eat healthily, exercise a lot and I’m not overweight. So doing as much as I can to minimise my cancer risk. As a child I remember my mum and other family members talking about the horrors of cancer and I’ve adopted the same fears !
And yes I agree not comparing myself to others which I’m always doing!

[CLKD]

Is there a family risk of cancer?  Also when caught early, most can be treated ;-).

Browse round.  Make notes. 

[Elliebee]

Hi CLKD no family risk of cancer thankfully! But there is a lot of worriers in the family!!

[marge]

I think it’s definitely an age thing and also the state of the world at the mo. Lots of horrible news around which saps the joy out of life. Getting older and fearing illness in ourselves and our loved ones is draining. l try to concentrate on the good things: my lovely family, my friends, my little garden, walks along the seafront, swimming and yoga.

[Elliebee]

Hi Marge I try to focus on the positives but sometimes the little nagging voice in my head takes over! I have a lovely family, supportive husband, beautiful home and great friends - so should be jumping with joy ! I love gardening, long walks too.

[marge]

You’re far from alone Elliebee.

[CLKD]

It takes a minute moment of 'what if' and the brain takes off on a journey of its own  ! 

The loving family etc. goes out the window.  Do U tell your DH your fears?  Though men don't feel 'the same' about issues as we do!

[Elliebee]

Hi CLKD, yes I do discuss with DH who is supportive but doesn’t understand why I worry so much. He’s one of these people who doesn’t worry too much !!

[CLKD]

You and me both!    

I don't worry until my gut gives that lurch 

[Elliebee]

I hate that horrible anxious gut feeling !