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[ATB]

You’ve only been on it for 6 weeks so you’re not going to be flooded with estrogen on that lower dose in that time and absolutely it has nothing to do with Graves- the bulging eye a symptom of that- as that is an auto immune condition. Really, tell yourself now that is not something you need to burden yourself with. You really don’t. It is possible this dose isn’t right for you or that you need to start small and slowly increase or that your body is just responding to estrogen fluctuations, which our bodies don’t like. In your shoes I would wait to Wednesday and have a proper assessment. Taking the patch off or lowering would cause different reactions that may confuse you or give you more to worry about.

[joziel]

Sheri with all due respect, I think you are leaping to huge conclusions and making knee-jerk reactions to things.

Whatever you are feeling now/in the immediate present, HRT:

Reduces the risk of osteoporosis.
Reduces the risk of dementia by 73% according to a recent study.
Reduce the risk of heart disease (the biggest killer of women).
Reduces the risk of bowel cancer.

And probably has many other long term health benefits we haven't found out about yet.

So stopping it just because since this week you feel anything... is probably not a sound decision. There are many different doses, types, routes of administration of HRT and it can take months to work out something that suits an individual woman. Don't throw the baby out with the bath water.

Get a blood test done by your doctor to see what your estrogen levels are on the 50 patch if you are worried they are too high. They are probably the opposite and you probably need more estrogen, not less....

[Sheri]

Thank you for being understanding & supportive. I'm having blood again after supposedly ending my period few days ago. Nothing dramatic, just like a brown/bloody discharge when i wipe. Guessing this is normal.
Strangely, i never suffer with health anxiety so panicking over thyroid in an anxious way us new to me.
I have my anxiety triggers that set me off & even though i have alot of health problems, I've never obsessed about it.
I'm feeling very low aswell & everytime my hubby says something to me, i feel like crying.
I'm hiding it all from him & everyone else & smiling like I'm the happiest girl in the world. Yet, inside I'm breaking.
These feeling are new & can only be attributed to the Estrogen side as on the progesterone i was great & that was the one i was dreading putting on.
My problem is, i looked up thyroid problems due to too much estrogen & hyperthyroidism came up & it snowballed & set off my anxiety/OCD.
Word to myself  - keep off Google lol
Thank you again, i do very much appreciate it.

[ATB]

I’m sorry you’re so down. My advice is to talk to your husband about all of it. I don’t know what I would of done without mine there to support me fully, he knows so much about menopause now!! It’s brought us even closer together and it is better for him to understand it’s nothing personal when I’m up and down and teary.

[Marchlove]

I agree Sheri, having a supportive husband and family is a huge help.
Keeping it bottled up inside and pretending to the world that everything is fine is a huge stressor to your body.
I’m they will be very supportive to you.
My hubby has been a true star, I’m very lucky in that respect. But what’s also interesting is that knowing more about menopause has changed his attitude to other female family and friends.
He once would have made a derogatory comment perhaps about someone to me but now his first thought is wondering if they have hormonal issues going on. This has made him a calmer more rounded person. He acknowledges this change in himself which is also lovely.
So it’s not just our own journey, although it sometimes feels like it is, but our whole family.
Best of luck to you and let us know how you get on. xxx

[Sheri]

I'm so glad your husbands have been understanding & supportive. Unfortunately, as good as my husband is regarding my other illnesses, he is very critical of any hormonal/mood swings & i know if i told him how i was feeling, regarding low, anxious, moody, it would be used against me if we ever had a disagreement. It would be, oh your on your period are you? Or mood swings again? And the whole world would be told, I'm hard to live with etc.
I avoid all confrontation as i hate it, so i bury it deeply & hide how i am. Its not easy but its the easiest route if i want a peaceful life.
I even hide my periods from him & if he ever wants sex when I'm on, i use the excuse i have thrush lol. Even if i have no mood swings when I'm on, he will look for something.
Truth be told, he actually gets more mood swings than me. You'd think he had PMS lol.
I know I've made him out to be a bad husband but he really isn't. He just listens to his work colleagues who are older than him & complain about their wives menopause & how much hell they're going through but no understanding of what their wives are going through. And no, my husband is stubborn & tunnel visioned.
But, if he's talking to other women about mood swings etc he has all the patience & understanding but with me...god no lol

[ATB]

That’s really sad to read, even though he may be wonderful in other ways this is really important and he isn’t making it easy for you. That’s a real shame. My husband is autistic and I have helped him a lot, our child is too. So I think he wants to reciprocate the efforts I’ve made to understand and support them.

[Sheri]

Your husband sounds wonderful & its so refreshing to hear that you both help & understand each others ... i wouldn't say problems but health issues.
You are both very lucky to have each other.
I don't even have the support of my parents. They don't really bother with me, even when I've been "dying" in hosp with pneumonia or when i had my lung transplant call, they never acknowledged it but i made sure i was there for my mum when she had a colostomy bag fitted.
I think, this episode of anxiety over thyroid/estrogen was brought on by missing my mum & my husband being critical of me this week & instead of processing it, i buried it & it came out as health anxiety.
Anyway,  sorry I've gone off  tangent. I didn't mean to get so deep & personal.
This HRT has really done a number on me. I promise i'm not usually this troublesome or depressing to talk to. I can be quite fun with my friends.

[Marchlove]

That is very sad Sheri, I really feel for you.
My husband was intolerant and indeed somewhat moody himself before all this kicked off with me.
I’m not saying it was easy but over time him seeing how awful I felt actually changed him for the better.
We had a lot of ups and downs to get where we are now, horrendous some of it, but we got through the other side.
I’m not saying this will work for you but it is something you could consider.
Do you have support of any friends going through the same thing? Or could you benefit from some counselling?
You need someone to help you through this but of course we are all here for you Sheri whenever you feel like it. X

[ATB]

I’m really sorry to hear that you lack support from family as well and that you have to hold so much in. You’re doing amazing on your own. My mother isn’t great at supporting me either and I find it really frustrating because I am very different with my child. It sucks. I hope you have friends you can talk to but if not, that’s what the forum is for. Please stop apologising for things! It’s ok to be down about this.

[CLKD]

Do U keep a mood/food/symptom diary to chart progress?  Helps the brain to stop assuming!  Don't GOOGLE.  Don't worry about thyroid function either.  try to concentrate on the HRT you are using and work towards getting a regime that eases symptoms.

Have you printed off 'hints for husbands' from the Forum?  Some men simply cannot cope if their wives are unwell; my Dad would help the World and his dog, but if Mum was ill .......

He is going to have to step up I'm afraid, peri-menopause doesn't go away simply because he can't discuss it.  I would stop hiding how I feel.  Have either of you been brought up to consider periods etc. as dirty, because that can certainly impact as we move into The Change.

Let us know how you get on. 

[Sheri]

I do keep a mood diary as i was seeing a psychologist. Unfortunately she moved from my Cf unit to cardiology so waiting to see my units new psychologist.
I have one friend who has recently started HRT. She's had the coil fitted & takes progesterone tablet ( think its the right way around). Its really helped her & so she doesn't appreciate how difficult I've found starting HRT but she is understanding.
My other friends don't seem to notice whether they're in peri or not as they aren't showing symptoms. And my CF nurse who is in peri, will not try HRT as she said both her sisters got breast cancer aft going on it.
My husband doesn't know I've started HRT. He thinks...because i told him...that the patch is to control my PCOS. I didn't want to lie but it felt easier to say that. Not sure how he thinks the patch is helping my PCOS but he doesn't really ask what my meds do anyway...
I'll try to stop apologising ATB but its ingrained in me. I've even apologise to people who bump into me when I'm out shopping.
Thank you all for being there for me. I'm very grateful to know you've listened, even though you don't know me.

[Marchlove]

Ah Sheri, think on….
Whose to know if all of your friends, who seem to be sailing through, really are.
A lot of them to various degrees will be having issues. They might not even realise it themselves or be in denial. Some of course will be doing ok.
I found when I started being more slowly more open, a lot more became apparent and slowly connections were made.
Little steps forward xx

[Sheri]

Quick update. I finally told my husband that the patch I'm wearing isn't for my PCOS but its actually HRT & that I'm struggling mentally.
I told him sternly, please don't use this as a way to blame me for being moody when i keep my moods, anxiety etc internal.
I reminded him that he hadn't noticed a difference in my moods these past few weeks since starting HRT but i have been struggling.
He admitted that he saw no difference in my moods but did notice i looked pale, walked slower & did seem quiet & lost in my thoughts (health anxiety) but not once was i sharp or nasty to him or argumentative.
So, i hope he never throws it in my face in the future & if he does, with the help of HRT i will handle it better & stand up for myself.

[Vicky81]

Awww sheri sending big hugs to you.
Glad you have told your husband what is really going on,, I hope things improve for you,  you sound so so lovely....we are all here for you xxxxxx