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[BlueBird]

It looks like I'm one of those lucky few who enter perimens early. My GP had mentioned it a few times but I shrugged them off due to my age and not thinking it was possible (doh!)! For reference my Mum hit menopause in her 60's and all my Aunts didn't become peri menopausal until their very late 50's.

I wanted to say hello and I hope I can contribute to the community going forward. I'm not sure what that'll look like given I'm just about as confused as one could get! But I'll do my best.

Possibly, maybe someone here with a bit of know-how can give me some insight?

I'm considering changing GPs because even though they kept suggesting menopause was cause of symptoms they only recentlyish checked my bloods (a few months ago). Since then they won't tell me much other than I'm perimenopausal. I asked for my blood results, which I'm waiting for. I understand that bloods don't tell the whole picture but I'd like to understand what the results are none the less.

Anyway, feel free to feedback your thoughts and in return I guess I'm just hoping everyone is having a great day! Until next time ladies!   

[CLKD]

Hi!  what age have you reached?  Peri can begin 10+ years earlier than our last period.

Browse round.     blood tests are reliably unreliable at this stage.  Some find that keeping a mood/food/symptom diary of use to chart progress.  Which symptom would you like to ease first?

Do read the 'bladder issues' and 'vaginal atrophy' threads.  4 warned is 4 armed.  One doesn't have to be having hot flushes to be in peri, despite what many GPs still believe!!

Is there a GP at your surgery interested in women's health, or a Practice Nurse?  It's about educating from both sides of the desk I think, especially across the medical profession!

[BlueBird]

Hi CLKD!

I'm 44 but my symptoms started about 3+ years ago. My GP has said that the diagnosis is based on FSH and a couple of other markers like estrogen and testosterone. I've contacted a menopause GP (private) and she said the same thing, so I guess GPs in the UK use blood as a way to determine if a women is peri? My estrogen and testosterone is very, very low. To the point that they couldn't register them. I've had my thyroid checked too, which I thought my be the cause of hot flashes. But, nope.

My biggest issues atm are the low mood, bone loss, bladder issues, poor sleep, hair loss and hot flashes. But, also if I'm 100% honest the loss of being able to have kids. It wasn't on the cards for me and I'm really struggling to grapple with this atm. The hair loss though, sheesh!?! Why?! ha. I've tried using minoxidil but it just turned me into a giant ball of grease - yuck! lol.

I've spoken to all of the women GPs in my surgery, they're all considerably younger than me and have been very dismissive of HRT and menopause. They're not empathetic at all. Which is fine, as long as they're able to help guide me through the process etc. But, this is also a fat nope.

I will absolutely read about the bladder issues and vagnial atrophy threads. I've been wondering if my chronic gastritis is related too. I wish we were taught about this instead of being left to figure it out later in life!

I would love to learn more and you're totally right, it is about education from both sides. Please feel free to hit me up with anything you think I should read, books, etc.

Thanks for your input and see you around!!

[PeriWhat?!]

Hi Bluebird, just anecdotally based on mine and my friends' experiences, it seems fairly common to start perimenopause in early 40s (although I also know women only starting with it age 60). It's one hell of a learning curve - trying to learn as much as you can about it can feel very overwhelming especially if your GP isn't knowledgeable, but this forum is really really helpful.

[BlueBird]

Thanks Peri!
In truth, I'm quite angry about it and feel very cheated. I've had non-stop unsupported health problems for years just before this and all the best years of my life are now gone. I genuinely thought I had more time, especially as the time you become peri is genetic - so, I'm really surprised I'm over a decade early. My other health conditions were left untreated and I was consistently told that they were in my head, turned out they weren't. I feel really let down. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with myself now. I'm hoping I can make something out of these last years. Sorry if I sound negative, I'm feeling quite low today.

I'll take a look around though and see what I find here!

[Cara999]

Hi Bluebird and welcome, sorry you're feeling low and feel you have been let down.

My periods started becoming irregular at 42 so you are definitely not too young for peri. I had never even heard of perimenopause before!!

The ladies on here are lovely and full of helpful knowledge, infact far more so than most GPs...

Let's stick together #girlpower  🤪

[Flossieteacake]

Hello BlueBird. I am 39 and in my second year of perimenopause. It is frustrating when DR's say people are too young. I can understand why you are feeling low. I think not having a supportive GP makes this so much harder. With the symptoms you have I would think HRT could really help but I know not everybody wants to try that. I did not have a blood test before going on HRT. I just said I wanted to try it. I just want to say, if you wanted children then it is not too late as you can have a child during perimenopause.

I think it is vital you get treatment for the vaginal atrophy as it is such an awful thing to have. You could try vagifem or ovestin. It is terrible the way the GPs are being so dismissive of HRT and your concerns. If it is possible then maybe you could change to another practice.

As your GPs say you are perimenopausal, I am confused as to why they are not prescribing HRT. I often misread information and get confused so I apologise if I have misunderstood.

[BlueBird]

Hi Bluebird and welcome, sorry you're feeling low and feel you have been let down.

My periods started becoming irregular at 42 so you are definitely not too young for peri. I had never even heard of perimenopause before!!

The ladies on here are lovely and full of helpful knowledge, infact far more so than most GPs...

Let's stick together #girlpower  🤪

Hi Cara! Thank-you my dear, hugs!

I'd read that of you're under the age of 45, it's young. I had a gynae visit for another reason and she said the same thing. I'd mentioned some of my symptoms, to which she looked at my age and was surprised. She couldn't help sadly, but she told me to go back to my GP - I did, they turned me away. *Sigh and huge eye roll!* I'm now looking at going private, even if it puts me into debt. I'm done with this nonsense!

I doubt kids are on the table, given I don't qualify for IVF (age!). But, you're probably right. Do you have kids?

How are you? How are you coping? Are you scared? What are your symptoms? I also have chronic gastritis, which I think it linked.

Hugs again, and yes 100% girl power! Thanks for the kind words, I hope I can return the kindness at some point. xxx

[CLKD]

I'll put the "You are too young" idea to bed.

NO ONE is too young.  What ever you read or what ever your health professional thinks.  Girls may have 1 period or none at all.  Peri-menopause can happen at any time from puberty until periods stop completely = menopause proper.  Symptoms may continue after.

Generally 51 is the mean age currently touted.

[Flossieteacake]

I'll put the "You are too young" idea to bed.

NO ONE is too young.  What ever you read or what ever your health professional thinks.  Girls may have 1 period or none at all.  Peri-menopause can happen at any time from puberty until periods stop completely = menopause proper.  Symptoms may continue after.

Generally 51 is the mean age currently touted.

Well said!

[BlueBird]

I'll put the "You are too young" idea to bed.

NO ONE is too young.  What ever you read or what ever your health professional thinks.  Girls may have 1 period or none at all.  Peri-menopause can happen at any time from puberty until periods stop completely = menopause proper.  Symptoms may continue after.

Generally 51 is the mean age currently touted.

Hi CLKD,

I'm none too bright, so what does mean age mean? And, I'm guess you mean that 51 is when women mostly become perimenopausal? Is that right?

I think the thing is that, I'm really concerned because everything I"m being told by medical professionals and reading in research shows that the younger you are the greater the chance of future disease. Given I've kinda had a life of disease and was just starting to come out the other side when I was diagnosed with chronic gastritis, then the hot flashes started, hair falling out -- I'm keen to avoid future issues.

I'm not trying to be a party pooper! I'm trying to get ahead of this, understand why this has happened to me (given genetics play a massive role in it, and I'm well over a decade, nearly 2 in my Mum's case, younger than the women in my family for starting this chapter) and try to come to terms with it. I'm quite angry at myself for not being more forceful, advocating for my health more but mostly angry that this is happening. Again, not trying to be a negative person here. I hope you understand.

But, I hear what you're saying. Thanks. xx

[CLKD]

As we age the body is a risk of ongoing health conditions.  It's normal.

Which medical professionals have you spoken to thus far?  Fortunately in the UK we have access to specialists in most conditions: however, not all of these will be au fait with everything  .  Which is why forums can be useful.  Reading experiences of others which can be used or put on the shelf for later reference.


HRT will help stave off osteoporosis and heart disease.  Regular compact exercise will starve off osteoporosis.  20 mins 3 times a week, brisk walking/skipping, will help.  Also, one needs a good healthy set of gnashes to keep the jaw bone healthy.  As with osteoporosis, the jaw requires movement to keep the teeth in place.  So using Tip-pe regularly will really help that gum health.

Cycling and swimming are good overall exercises. 

Which particular disease might you be worried about? 

Being angry is a waste of time.   . Stress can cause many illnesses ......... anger can take up a lot of head space! all the what if I had/not ......

mean age - 51 which seems to be an acceptable age to reach for peri-menopause.  Which can begin 10+years prior to the last monthly period.  Mine waxed and waned for years  . 

[Cara999]

Bluebird hugs right back at ya lovey.

I ended up seeing a private gynecologist as well because I was getting fobbed off with thrush, dermatitis etc and none of the creams were working, infact making things worse!!

I do have children they are both adults now. I'm so sorry you haven't had the chance to become a mum if thats something you wanted, but you can still get pregnant in peri...

My main symptom is vag atrophy which affects your life massively, never even heard of it before. Never looked at my vagina as much in my life as these last 6 month haha. I'm also a little anxious, moody and have occasional night sweats. I'm waiting to start HRT to see if that helps.

Please don't feel down, Try and stay positive, better times are ahead xxx

[BlueBird]

As we age the body is a risk of ongoing health conditions.  It's normal.

Which medical professionals have you spoken to thus far?

HRT will help stave off osteoporosis and heart disease.  Regular compact exercise will starve off osteoporosis.  20 mins 3 times a week, brisk walking/skipping, will help. 
Cycling and swimming are good overall exercises. 

Which particular disease might you be worried about? 

mean age - 51 which seems to be an acceptable age to reach for peri-menopause.

Re which Drs - A few GPs, 1 gynae, 2 sexual health nurses.
Re HRT - I can't take HRT due to comorbid conditions according to GPs. I'm also physically disabled, so skipping, walking etc isn't an option.
Re diseases - mainly heart & brain health, osteoporosis, and currently (years now) having issues with chronic gastritis and bladder issues (likely to be permanently catheterized based on last consult a couple of weeks ago).
Re mean age - ah! thanks for explaining, much appreciated.

Re anger - I'm not normally an angry person, to the point where I annoy people with my positive outlook (!) but this has come at the worst time in my life and the lowered hormones are wreaking havoc on my sleep and well being. You sound like you've got your stuff together though, which is good! I hope you thrive through this part of your journey. I hope I too get to a more settled stage.

Thanks again for your time, thoughts and care! It's very much appreciated.

[BlueBird]

Please don't feel down, Try and stay positive, better times are ahead xxx

I honestly think its the hormones! Sheesh! But, also circumstances. It's complicated and I think this just stings. Acquired disability, nope, I just made due. And, you know crappy life events that we all go through, I've just coped and managed. This, this feels personal. But, I know it won't always feel this way. At least, I bloody well hope not! hahah! 

Oh wow, that's rubbish! What is it with women being fobbed off like this?! I think it's worse when it comes from female Drs, honestly. I"m so pleased you're getting it sorted out though. That must have erm, uh, not fun (!) to put it mildly! Vag atropy sounds so painful. I've got that weird constant drip from my bladder, I swear I smell likemy Gran with all the lavender oil! How did it come to this?! hahah.

Ha, I know what you mean re suddenly looking at your vagina though, after not knowing what on earth it looks like for the most part. I too have the same, the bothersome itch is nuts! A friend's kid was singing 'ants in my pants' at me as I kept scooching around... you really have to laugh. I was thinking just how sad it is that we're not taught about any of this at all. I had a gynae team for years for another health condition and none of this was ever mentioned, not even in school. It's a real shame. I hope this next generation have it better.

I'm in London, currently debating Gynae or private GP. Atm, it's looking like a private GP to get the ball rolling and then hopefully she can refer me should I need to be referred.

Let's see where this takes us! Thanks so much for the love, it's making things a lot easier to deal with. None of my gfs are going through this, so, I'm feeling quite on my own atm. xxxx