Dangermouse
Your post is spot on. I have so many rules, and that feeling of control otlr lack of it, is so strong.
I constantly scour the news, as if I don't I might miss something, and therefore put myself in danger by not realising that there are other rules.
Years ago, when it was in the news about bacon being carcinogenic, I used to get panic attacks if I even walked past bacon in the shops. I know that sounds stupid and laughable, but unfortunately it's true.
Anyway, it was a new rule for me, no more bacon.
Jeepers xx