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[Souris]

I turn 50 next week, and I stopped birth control pills in early October. Since then, I feel like my mind and body have fallen completely apart, and I'm a mess. I had the initial period right away like I was on the placebo pills, but I haven't had any bleeding since then. My FSH levels show I'm in menopause, though my doctor says it won't be technically menopause until I don't have a period for a year.

I'd been having some issues with heat intolerance for about a year before then, but since then, I've had hot flashes every day, plus acne. The acne seems to have calmed down some recently. But I wake up at least once a night with a hot flash.

The biggest issue for me so far has been almost constant widespread body pain -- it can feel like muscle pain, joint pain or deep bone pain. And I'm so stiff! Yoga poses I could do several months ago with little problem, I can't come close to doing now. It seems like every problem area I've had over the years decided to start hurting again with a vengeance, all at once, plus new areas. The other day, it felt like somebody was driving a knife into my shin, for hours. That was a new one. It was excruciating. My back especially hurts all the time.

I've long had anxiety, especially health anxiety, which I've been handling pretty well for the past few years with medicine. But this has driven it through the roof! At my last doctor visit, a blood test showed a spike in my blood calcium levels to just above normal, and a below-normal white cell count. We ruled out my parathyroid causing it, so I've been in near hysterics convinced I have cancer. My doctor isn't as concerned about it being that, and is sending me to an endocrinologist to investigate further, but my anxiety is driving me absolutely crazy about that. I'm convinced I have cancer in my bones and am dying. I'm trying to hang on to her lack of immediate concern, but it's hard. I can think of little else.

I also have very low iron (that doesn't surprise me, because I'm a vegetarian and also have ulcerative colitis, which can mess with mineral absorption).

My sleep is pretty messed up. I've been waking up every night after about three hours of sleep and having trouble getting back to sleep. If it's not a hot flash waking me up, it's my anxiety. Lack of good sleep of course creates a vicious circle of making me feel worse physically and mentally. I've been trying an essential oil diffuser with lavender, plus relaxation techniques, and taking a muscle relaxer plus an antihistamine before bed, but I don't know if they're helping.

I'm not certain about taking HRT. I need to talk to my doctor more about it. I'm scared to take it, but I'm also scared NOT to take it!

I thought I knew the things to expect from menopause, like hot flashes, but I never heard about the pain and anxiety. Who else has dealt with these things?

[CLKD]

Yep.  It's The Change and catches many by surprise.

As oestrogen levels drop off muscles may become lax = aches and pains.  Do you take over the counter pain relief?

Also, the body may become dry: inside and out.  Skin, scalp, deep in the ears; nostrils, back of the throat; vagina .... do read the threads about that 1, forewarned is forearmed 

Some develop food and alcohol intloreance so don't be surprised  . 

Health anxiety can rise.   Think about what is going on in your whole life.  Can you delegate?  Can you cut back on X, Y, Z ......... a lack of sleep is common as is indigestion, IBS, reflux ........

Did the GP repeat your below-normal white cell count?  How long do you have to wait for an appt. to an endocronlotigst?  [pity I can't spell  ]

[jennyr265]

Hi Souris,
One of my first symptoms was widespread spread body pain and stiffness, in particular my hip and lower back. I did pilates regularly and like you found myself unable to do exercises i had no problem with previously.
I also had high calcium and a below normal wbc but because my parathyroid hormone levels were within range my dr ruled out hyperparathyroidism (phpt)  Unfortunately this was the wrong diagnosis as phpt can present with normal parathyroid hormone levels. It took me another year to get the correct diagnosis - i did have phpt and had an operation after which things did improve.
I see that you  have been referred to an endo so hopefully they will be able to double check this for you.
There's an excellent website - hyperparathyroiduk.com which has lots of useful info which it may be worth looking at.
Phpt does unfortunately mess with your head! I had terrible brain fog and lots of anxiety.

[CLKD]

Might I suggest that you take a list of worries to the appt.?

[lesley998]

I just wanted to add my pennethworth.  I too thought I had bone cancer. I couldnt understand why I was so sore all the time.  I felt like the tin man. 
It is definitely caused by reduced oestrogen in the body.  One of the many amazing things this hormone does is it acts like a lubricant for the joints and connective tissue.  Without it, we seize up.
I also developed frozen shoulder (adhesive capsulitis) in early meno which made things worse.
Please take heart....it is simple (ha!) meno, and HRT can help.

[CLKD]

Yep.  Frozen shoulder is common at 'this age' as is hiatus hernia: because muscles become lax. 

[sheila99]

Another one here with pain mostly in the hips, also anxiety and insomnia which I had never had before. Do consider hrt, it's made a huge difference to my quality of life. Have a look at the Advice for Husbands pinned post, you may have other symptoms you hadn't associated with meno.

[Souris]

Thank you all so much for the replies! It's good to know I'm not alone. Not that I want others to experience this pain and anxiety, but it does make me feel better and reassured about my situation. I know I'm still going to have some periodic freak-outs about the pain being something more serious than "just" menopause, but I hope I can keep my emotions more level.

They haven't called yet to set up the endo appointment, so I'm sure it will be awhile yet before I'm seen.

I also forgot to include that my mental faculties have diminished (isn't that ironic that I forgot that?  ). I can't concentrate like I used to, I feel stupider, and I have trouble finding the right words. I started noticing that before I stopped the birth control pills. It's very frustrating. And I also feel dehydrated a lot, waking up with a dry cotton mouth.

One odd thing is that I've frequently gotten migraines and neck/shoulder pain for many years. I always got them during the placebo pills time. But out of all the extensive pains I've been having, I haven't had a migraine since I stopped the birth control pills! (knock on wood)

I'll be talking more with my doctor about HRT.

[CLKD]

Oh loss of words, forgetting peoples' names is common at this time of Life  - whatever 'this time' might be.

You are in Good Company 

[Souris]

Just found out I can't get an endocrinologist appointment until APRIL 15!!!! I'm so upset. They said they'd put me on the waiting list for a cancellation, and I can keep calling to check if something opens up, but I don't know if I can make it until then! I know my worry about my calcium levels signaling cancer is going to drive me crazy! I have a followup appointment with my primary doctor on Feb. 21, and I'm sure she'll check my levels again then to see if they've gone up more, but it seems like it's going to take a long time to find out anything for sure.

Waiting is soooooooo hard when you have anxiety! I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin and just want to scream. I want to curl up in a corner and cry and cry.

My gynecologist suggested starting an estrogen patch (Vivelle 0.05 mg twice a week) and a progesterone pill (Prometrium 100 mg daily) to see if that would help with the hot flashes and maybe the pain/anxiety. I just don't know what to do, given the uncertainty about the calcium levels.

(I'm in the U.S., by the way, not the U.K.)

[CLKD]

hi! If it was thought that you were at risk I am sure that you would have been squeezed in for an appt..  Nothing is going to happen overnight, the body doesn't usually get where it is suddenly unless due to surgical intervention.  Which is why it can take a while for HRT to be of benefit or for antidepressants to kick in.

...... and breath.  Why would a slightly raised calcium level = cancer?  Which particular cancer would that be?   I had cancer in the 1990s but my blood tests were normal.  Still here !   What do you actually fear?  My biggest was that panic attacks would mean that I was unable to go to treatments.

[MicheleMaBelle]

Hi Souris. Sorry you're having a bit of a tough time but please take some comfort from the fact that EVERYTHING you've described, I've had. I felt so terribly ill both physically and mentally. I thought at times I was dying and at other times, that I had a serious illness. Nope, it was the menopause.
I'm on HRT, it's helped but it took quite a while to get it right and I still don't think it's a silver bullet. What's to lose by trying the HRT bearing in mind that it might need some tweaking.

Not sure what the low calcium levels mean but I do know that any sort of tummy problems can lead to absorption problems so maybe you could try some oral vitamin sprays ( eg iron, calcium, vitaminD ) to see if these help.

Anxiety and health anxiety seems to be a common problem so try not to worry. 🤪
So many things change, we all react differently but what you are experiencing isn't unusual.
I wish you well- let us know how you're doing x

[MicheleMaBelle]

And clearly I can't tell the difference between an apostrophe and a question mark ! 

[CLKD]

Not U MaBelle but if you are using a gadget rather than a lap top, apparently it does it's own thing 

[CLKD]

Relaxation therapy:

lay or sit in a comfy position
low lights
not too warm
hands in lap

take a deep breath through the nose - hold
let breath go as slowly as possible
repeat twice - rest

lift hands and flap gently
wriggle toes
move the neck and head gently
shrug shoulders, gently

when in bed: starting at the toes stretch; hold; relax
working up the body through all the muscle groups

low light at night
soft music by the bed
my go to is a deep bubble bath

I have found 'rescue remedy' mouth spray useful too