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[Redlocks]

Thanks ladies.
These blips are bad - I took a trazodone last night as directed by the psychiatrist and it's been awful today - I feel hungover and now more anxious because of the dizziness, so I'm scared to go out! Been in bed pretty much all day, but I wanted to take something other than Benzos. I don't know what to do!
X

[Redlocks]

Right, I've decided I'm going to take half the dose of trazodone as it seemed to help my anxiety somewhat but also made me very out of it today :/
Will take a little break from the forum while I try to get back on my feet. I keep agonising over whether it's hormones or not and for now that's just academic - I need to focus on what will actually help in the meantime.
Again, I'm so grateful to all of you and will report back! Hang in there everyone, and if you are feeling better then long may that continue!
X

[Redlocks]

A belated thanks for this info, Birdy! I'm next seeing Dr Panay in April and I'll mention it, see if he thinks it might be worth trying
X

[squeaker99]

Hi Redlocks. The HRT I tried made my anxiety much worse ( I was put on HRT primarily for my anxiety
as I had no other symptoms like flushes). I was told that my oestrogen was probably too high to start with or swinging from
high to low which may have fulled the anxiety. (This was from a NHS Meno ' specialist who wouldn't do any blood tests
though). So who knows. I did try some patches for a few weeks but felt manic on them .  I had a very bad anxiety period during Peri for
a good year. It is a terrible place to be but it WILL shift. For me I had to get out and do some exercise or put the radio
on and paint a wall - just keep busy and keep not over thinking things. If you sleep is not good you will certainly feel
anxious during the day.

Please keep trying to find the positive. Just put something you like on loud - the Spice Girls, Barry Manilow, the Bee Gees
whatever. Bake a cake. Write a list of things that make you happy and try to do just one a day. What you are feeling is ' normal' for many unfortunately.

Ups and downs seem the name of the game here - magic solutions are the anxiety but just aren't out there - I have
looked. Hopefully the next generation will fayre better.

[squeaker99]

P.S Ment to say I bought a Kindle/ebook on Positive Affirmations. What you were saying about
'thinking' yourself positive and less anxious. There is some truth in this I think but you have to
practise and keep at it.   In bed I talk to myself in a sleepy slow voice and image my family all yawning around me.
I think ' you are so veeery sleep and can hardly keep your eyes open'. - it does work. It tricks you brain.
In the same vein just putting a forced smile on your face helps release some positive chemicals.I did this
during my Lidl shop and probably got some weird looks but I was feeling so rough that I tried to ' act' myself
out of it - kind of worked as I got the giggles thinking how funny must look with a rictus grin on my face.

I have had days when I feel so engulfed in anxiety I can almost taste it when all the above is very hard to
put in practise.

[CLKD]

I can get sudden dips.  I am OK one moment and seconds later can be curled in a corner, shaking all over 

[Baby]

Yes CLKD. The last two days this has been me. Got up this morning really anxious, an hour later a feeling of happiness then this afternoon went down and felt shaky then about four o'clock mood lifted again.

[CLKD]

Low blood sugar?  How is your diet over 24/7 ?

[Baby]

Preety good. Breakfast yogurt and banana lunch sandwich evening meal potatoes veg and meat.

[Redlocks]

Hello ladies,
Thanks for your kind words. I've been given trazodone as I'm just completely overwhelmed at the moment. I freaked out the first time I took it last week but will restart tonight.
I'm just in a cycle of fear at the moment, fear of everything, but luckily I was able to visit my friend over the weekend. Now I'm back home and feeling like I can't cope with the simplest things that usually I could deal with fine! I saw a psychiatrist on Friday who said I need lots of psychological help. There I was finally wondering if maybe there wasn't anything deeply wrong with me and it was just hormones, but after what she said I feel lost again. Just down at the moment, but am hoping the meds will pick me up again.
X

[Bring me Sunshine]

Hi redlocks

In 2017 I was referred to a physchiatrist as no anti depressants were touching the depression(no one had mentioned menopause to me despite me then approaching 51) I kept asking at work did anyone feel depressed thinking it may be that but the ladies I asked only had hot flushes and thats all I naiveily thought Menopause was, hot flushes.  My mum had died young so no one else to ask family wise.  Sertraline, Mitrazapine, Ariprozole and finally Venaflaxine 300mg! Nothing touched the depression off work for months (since left it) I sat looking at this physchiatrist and him at me telling me I was treatment resistant and no idea what to do with me.  I was suicidal.  Then one day towards end of Jan 2018 after finally being referred to a meno clinic and experimenting with different hrt, tablets and then gel.  I got up to 4 pumps and I was well, joy returned, planning thinking ahead not hiding away, was interested in other people again, even liked them as I had felt sad, mad, scared now I felt glad to be alive.  For me it was obviously hormonal and I needed to get up to the right level.  I had suffered depression in the past from around 20 due to bereavements, infertifilty failing etc but that was always put right within months with anti depressants so this time I was totally terrified, hated myself, guilt continously that I was a burden on my family, failure, what was the point of me being alive  etc etc all those negative words that go through your mind.  The past was all negative in my head, the present and I had no future.  Then I was well again.  Do not think you will not get well, you WILL its just getting the right balance of treatment and it takes time and its hard because we all want to be fixed and well, so badly.  I stayed well and even reduced the pumps to 3 around end 2018.  I am curruntley having a blip for some reason.  I am going to have a blood test hopefully this week and have increased about a week ago up to 4 pumps of gel.

Its scary its awful its a waiting game for things to turn around again but things do turn around again you just cant put a time on it but never give up becuase it may not be this week or next but it will happen!  I was at the end of the road and it turned around and it will for you.

Take care x

[jillydoll]

Thank you Bring Me sunshine.
A great post.
Thanx for sharing, and hopefully some ladies on here will read it and have some hope again.

Hope you start to feel well again quite quickly.
Let us know plz.

Jd xx

[Bring me Sunshine]

Hi JD

I absolutely will share anything that gets me back up again and living in this rollercoaster life!!

This is a quote sent to me years ago when I had never even heard of menopause but was going through a depression after my dad had died.

This guy's walking down the street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can't get out.
A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, 'Hey you. Can you help me out?' The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.
Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, 'Father, I'm down in this hole can you help me out?' The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on.
Then a friend walks by, 'Hey, Joe, it's me can you help me out?' And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, 'Are you stupid? Now we're both down here.' The friend says, 'Yeah, but I've been down here before and I know the way out.'

I know we are all different and not one treatment suits all (if only) but there is a treatment and it will work and whatever we can share can only help and thats why this forum is valuable to so many people.  I feel guilty as I hadnt been on for months and months because I was so busy living but you forget that women are still going through hard times and then new ones come along its for ever going but so grateful for it.  xxx

xx

[Ladybt28]

Ace Posts - Bring me Sunshine!  I don't know where I would be or would have been without the forum.  I too was like you with the life stuff but AD's didn't fix it ever and my peri/meno was horrendous but there is light at the end of the tunnel if you can find the will to keep going.  For some of us though there is no other alternative than to keep going!
 
So glad to have you back with us on the forum.  Like the "hole analogy" its brill 

[Baby]

Brilliant words. You know you are not going mad when you read of so many ladies suffering. If it wasn't for this forum I would think it was just me because every lady I have spoken to face to face have just had one kind of HRT and it has worked for them. I look on here and it isn't just me even if my doc says your HRT should work so it must just be my nerves and not the menopause.x