Hi Ali
Some lovely wise words above. And I am so sorry, so terribly sorry.
In terms of your GP knowing what to do with you ... they have hundreds, sometimes thousands, of patients and so they're fairly experienced. Key here, as you know, is to be able to communicate how you're feeling health-wise, both physically and mentally. Making a list (CLKD is a big fan) is a great way of getting things down on paper and into an order. You've already done that ... How are you sleeping?
In terms of the symptoms you're describing, given that you've had an ECG, yes it's probably 'anxiety', although that's a bit of a catch all term and what you're experiencing is trauma. As you know, the body and mind aren't separate, we come as whole people, and it's not unusual for feelings to present physically. You've got such a lot to process, and it's still ongoing. You mention your family, who you're plainly being extremely strong for, and that also has a 'cost'. It's OK, you can take that at the moment. You're doing this huge thing. I'm really pleased that your 13 year old daughter has found a therapist she can open up to.
My son, who's 26 now, was born with a congenital condition which means he's been very sick from time to time. He has life-threatening epilepsy. Anyway, point being, it's an enormous amount of emotional stress. I kind of know what it's like to carry the whole world on your shoulders, to care for your family in the middle of intense pain, to keep going because if you're not sure what would happen if you stopped ...
CLKD mentions CRUSE above, this is good advice. And the best advice anyone ever gave to me: 'Be kind to yourself'. I manage my anxiety (or basically the fall out from trauma) by emergency meds (Diazepam) and taking time. I can't do yoga or mindfulness, because I can't stop the endless war in my head. However, I do enjoy massage, from a therapist, and find that this balances my body, kind of, or enough. I deliberately make the time to see friends I can trust with my fragility.
Take it easy, Ali.
With all the best wishes in the world, EK