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[Sharon J]

Was really fed up this morning, looked in the mirror very pale, feeling very unattractive.... so I decided to fake tan, even lifted my 38E  up threw them over my shoulders and tanned underneath too, well I couldn't not really or I'd have two huge white patches on show when I lay on my back and they go under my armpits tonight  .   I've cut the grass, trimmed some bushes ( in the garden not mine! )   now I'm knackered so I'm sitting big fat size 18 arse on a lounger on the patio turning a nice shade of mahogany ........... Er  David Dickinson if you can imagine comes to mind ............. Mmm maybe I went a bit to overboard trying to get a bit of a healthy glow to make myself feel a bit brighter , oh well never mind that will just transfer all over the fresh white bedding later, never mind when I'm in the wide awake club at 3am  I'll have plenty of time to strip the bed      Now I can see a few hairs reappearing on my chin again in the reflection of my phone, oh I best get the tweezers and pull those buggers out, I don't want a beard as well........ Right where did I put those bloody tweezers best check the fridge first it seems the obvious place to look first they'll be anywhere except where they should be 🏃

[CLKD]

Sounds about right from where I'm sitting  -  4 sharing. 

[jaypo]

Hahahahaha nice one Sharon,made me smile,hope you found the tweezers,if not in fridge look in one of your shoes 😆😂

[Sharon J]

Yup found the tweezers,  hair free chin now 

[kayellvee]

 

I ordered Miranda's Daily Dose of Such Fun by Miranda Hart a few weeks ago - was feeling really shitty earlier so decided to go through it and highlight which of her fun suggestions I might try.  Decided to make water balloons - had fun throwing them at the garden wall and getting well and truly soaked in the process    Now I'm in a better mood, so it worked.

[Sharon J]

  such fun! Brilliant kayellvee ..... Great news the balloons worked.    I'll try that one 😂........... I'm feeling a bit wired can't sit down and chill, oldest daughter arrives home looking all glam.... Bitch  she's had a lovely spray tan at work to top up her fading holiday tan ( she's hairdresser) firstly laughing because of my tan, it's now turned an orange shade of umpa lumpa....... For the love of god give me a break, am I going to be able to leave the house tomorrow to do a big shop, or will I look like the ready brek kid from years ago glowing like there's some sort of radiation accident happened 😂 😂 then she's like mum it's like your on something.    Yep
the hamster on the wheel running around won't stop and let my mind rest    both girls have taken the dog out as they can't stop laughing at the looney mother        I'm actually sat in the garden now as it's so lovely with a  few candles lit. But I'm being disturbed by the police helicopter hovering overhead right now, they've been over 3 times ...... Omg am I glowing that much...... Mad

[jaypo]

Oh I get where you're coming from with the daughter thing, I went into town yesterday with mine,thought to myself as I looked in the mirror,hey,not bad for an old un,then my daughter strolls in,tiny black skin tight mini dress,high heels,hair all messy but gorgeously done up with a tied headscarf,next time I looked in mirror...........tellytubby 😏😏

[Foxylady]

  x

[jillydoll]

I look like your daughter everyday Jay........ .........NOT!    Look more like,       

[CLKD]

I look like your daughter every day: underneath the brown paper sack 

What's the helicopter up for, someone missing or off to Hospital?  Blue for Police, yellow for air ambulance, green for those sporting an ump-lumpa tan?

[jaypo]

Haha,you gorgeous Jill,don't believe her ladies,she's a hot mama 😊
I don't normally think I look too old until my daughter stands next to me,must get her to walk 10 steps behind me at all times

[jillydoll]

Don't be so daft Jay! 🤨 you look amazing. She really does ladies. 🙂

I do wish I could go back and look ‘young' again. Tell you what, magnifier mirrors DONT help AT ALL. But I need it to see all those bloody long hairs that have started to appear! Also need it to put make up on...or else I'd go around looking like this 👉 🤡.        😆😂

[Wrensong]

  ladies - that did me a world of good!

[jaypo]

Omg!! Don't talk to me about magnifying mirrors, I never knew I'd such hairy nostrils 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

[jillydoll]

Wait till they start coming outa our ears like my blokes do! 😆😂🤣 🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀