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[Fairywoods]

Hi,

I have read a lot of useful and helpful information on here and just wanted to warn others not to do what I did yesterday.  I'm 52 and nearly post menopausal (last natural period October).  Having been to my NHS GP earlier in the year and tried HRT briefly for 4 months (gave up due to side effects) I have recently been experiencing horrendous night sweats and disrupted sleep so decided I wanted to try HRT again.  I thought I would try and see a menopause specialist rather than my GP so that I could have expert advice.  I've read a lot of information on Dr Louise Newson's website but she's too far away and it's expensive.  So after a fair bit of research I choose a female private GP in London who claimed she offered 'affordable private GP and menopause assessment services'.  She is on a list of 'private menopause specialists' and also listed as a specialist by the British Menopause Society.

My consultation was an hour long and I had already filled in a symptom chart.  She took a brief history and then asked me to explain in more detail what was wrong which I did (I explained that I had tried Oestrogel/Utrogestan for 4 months but had horrible side effects from the Utrogestan).  She then kept talking round in circles and repeatedly asking me what HRT I wanted (if I knew that I wouldn't have needed her advice!).  I was expecting the doctor to give me a clear explanation of my options, the risks and benefits (which she didn't mention) and what she thought was the best course of action.  All she did was take my blood pressure, weighed and measured me and told me I was obese with a BMI of 26 and then kept asking me what sort of HRT I wanted.  She then said she would prescribe an estrogen patch which I should take without progesterone to establish the right level of estrogen first and see how I felt before adding in progesterone and see her in two months when she would take hormone bloods tests and that I'd potentially need scans to check my womb lining.

She then issued the prescription, took my money and told me there was a Boots nearby.  I went to get the prescription only to be told they didn't have it and it was out of stock with the manufacturer (Evorel patch).  So I walked back to the clinic and told the receptionist.  The receptionist spoke to the doctor who came out into the waiting room where she spoke to me in front of another patient.  She took the prescription away and came back with another one for Estraderm patch and told me to take it home and try a local pharmacist and if they don't have it email her!

I came away confused, upset, humiliated and a lot poorer.  I was hoping for reassurance and good, sound advice.  I will not be going back and when I have got over this experience I will go to my NHS GP, it may be a longer route to get the right treatment for me but I do trust the NHS.  I thought I would try and sort this myself instead of bothering my overstretched NHS GP surgery but I found out the hard way that private isn't necessarily better or more knowledgeable.  Be careful before wasting money like me.

[Anjia]

That's terrible your gp could have sorted things just the same absolutely disgusting !!

[Fairywoods]

Thank you Anjia and Birdy for your sympathetic responses, I felt so humiliated and the lack of empathy and ability to explain things and treat me appropriately was upsetting.  I don't have expensive clothes/designer handbag so maybe she took one look at me and thought she wouldn't make much money in the long term.  I feel pretty down about it all anyway and to be told I'm obese when actually looking on the BMI scale, 26 is in the lower part of the 'overweight' section was not what I needed to hear, I think losing 9lbs would take me into the normal range so I'm not exactly obese and I realise it would be good if I could lose a bit of weight.  And then prescribing me something that is out of stock and talking to me in front of another patient was very unprofessional.  Also she didn't discuss the risks of hrt which was a bit negligent (although I do know about them).  I feel a fool and my self esteem has taken a knock.  I just don't want other ladies experiencing the same thing.

[Sparrow]

The NHS comes in for a lot of criticism but thank heavens it's there.

[Tc]

Fairy. What happened to you has brought tears to my eyes.
 
I dont know about you but I already feel so vulnerable when I walk into a doctors surgery with all this HRT stuff. And then to be treated so poorly and unprofessionally and feel ripped off it's no wonder you are upset.

To spend hard earned cash  to receive such a lack of  advice and treatment  just makes me fuming  she didnt do anything a gp could not have done.

You probably dont feel like complaining at the moment but heres a link with some info for if and when you do.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/6999307.stm

 Might  I suggest go back to your gp.as soon as poss and  ask for a referral to a menopause clinic. I live in Essex and I have been referred to Chelsea and Westminster. Under the NHS. There is a fairly long waiting list I was referred in June  and my appt is in October. So  get the ball rolling now.
In the meantime can you see if there is a gp or practice nurse in your surgery who has a menopause/HRT interest?

Im so sorry what she said about your weight has made you feel humiliated and knocked your confidence  dont let her do that to you. She is wrong anyway. BMI obese catagory is over 30. Put what she said right out of your mind. 

You are not foolish you were seeking specialist help and you had a right to expect more, you cannot have known it would fall so short.

Thank you for sharing your experience. It's important that we share these things. It may help others.

Fairy   please treat yourself today or in next few days. Do something you enjoy just for you to lift your spirits.

 

[Fairywoods]

Hi TC, thank you so much for your kind and lovely reply.  That's exactly how I feel, totally vulnerable and as if I'm making a fuss because it's not an illness as such but it can severely affect our quality of life.  I've read loss of confidence and anxiety can be related to depleting hormones and although I know that, it's tough when you're going through it to even think clearly.  I will go to my GP when I'm feeling a bit less emotional and thank you for the link and the encouragement to do something nice for myself.  Your reply has lifted and cheered me up, just to know that someone else gets it.  Thank you for taking the time to send such a lovely, helpful reply x

Thank you too Birdy, I may feel like complaining in a couple of days when I'm not feeling so upset.  Thank you 

[Mogster71]

Hi Fairywoods

You poor thing, what an absolutely awful experience to have. That sounds like money for old rope to me! What a con, and how disappointing for you to have psyched yourself up with the hope of getting expert help. I would absolutely be speaking to the British Menopause Society about this if she is listed. Even basic manners and protocol about discussing your personal treatment in front of others is out of order.

Rarrr. don't get me started today I'm on a progesterone-fuelled mission!!

BMI is rubbish too. I get that they have to have general guidelines but 26 is only one of out being in the normal range. Pfft.

Be kind to yourself - there are some good guys out there to help. Sending you a virtual hug X

[Fairywoods]

Hi Mogster, thank you for your lovely response.  It has made me feel so much better that you and the other ladies on this forum understand and have been so supportive.  I feel there are some private GPs out there who are taking advantage and 'hopping on the menopause bandwagon' to make money out of women that are vulnerable anyway.  Menopause isn't an illness but it can affect women so much and there hasn't been enough research put into it.  I read recently that in Victorian times, women usually died two years after menopause - now we are living 30+ years after menopause.  I actually feel angry now at the 'treatment' I received (but in a good, positive way).  On reflection, I am sure the GP was just interested in making money from very rich women, rather than the best treatment for someone who had thought carefully about whether to try private.  Thank you for taking the time to reply, it has made me feel so much better x

[Fairywoods]

Shadyglade, totally agree with you too.  The NHS gets a lot of criticism but I am very grateful and think we are so lucky to have it.  The problem is too much demand and huge pressure on NHS staff - I felt embarrassed going to my surgery and bothering them about HRT as I know the pressures they are under but also think there has been too little research into something that affects 75% of menopausal women (would love to know how 25% of women sail through menopause though, they might have the magic answer  !)

[Jari]

Hi Fairywoods

Sorry you too had a bad experience. It really does make us doubt these private “menopause specialists” doesn’t it!!

I had a similar experience. I was not impressed at all.
I had my last period 2 years ago and was suffering with quite intense hot flushes and night sweats. My lovely NHS GP refused me HRT due to a family history, but, because my symptoms were so horrible at that time, I went to see a private gynae in London. He is well known.
His waiting room was full. When it came to my turn, he was almost writing the prescription before I’d sat down. I explained that my GP had been concerned about giving me HRT. He said that he wouldn’t worry about that as it’s low risk and gave me my prescription, telling me to come back every 3 months.
Each time paying £180 for that 5 mins appointment.
I’m sure he loves to see as many women as he can, to pay for his big house etc..
I think a lot of women are being shoved on HRT, not because they really need it, but because these private “specialists” are living great lives off them.
I had hideous symptoms after 2 months of taking hrt. Sure, my hot flushes went, but the hideous symptoms I got were far far worse.
I saw another private gyna to compare them. She was just as bad. I had a scan and she said she could see a small fibroid which wasn’t there before the hrt. She said hrt causes fibroids to grow and that she can book me in to get that removed. ( at a huge cost) I refused. She said that I should have it removed because she had recently seen a lady where a small fibroid was hiding her cancer. Basically trying to scare me into having this minor op.

She was interested to see the prescription the well known gynae had given me, as if she was learning from it.
I really think they’re all just playing with ideas while they cash in!!

I don’t take hrt since that horrendous experience and have realised that things are calming down on their own, which I wouldn’t have known, if I was still taking hrt.

My bmi went up with hrt because I put on a lot of weight whilst on it. It is now in the higher end of the recommended bracket and I’m trying to get it down to the mid point of recommended level as I’ve found by having it lower, definitely reduces symptoms.

Hang in there and hope you are feeling better. X

[Peripurple]

Hi fairy woods,

I have seen 2 private consultants, one of which came highly recommended on here.  Both were awful experiences I do not intend to repeat.  One was so focussed on what I could and couldn't afford and the other tried to diagnose with a very obscure illness trying to convince me my problems were not hormone related, when very clearly they are.  I will not go private again, instead keeping myself as well informed as possible, and discussing with my GP who generally is open to suggestions.

[Fairywoods]

Hi Jari,

Thanks for your reply, really interesting to hear your experience but shocking how much you were charged for a 5 min appointment!! I guess they play on the fact that we're vulnerable and hoping HRT will work and maybe it does work really well for some women but like you my side effects were awful.  I'm going to try and increase my exercise and look after myself more and hope that this current spell of night sweats is just a spell and maybe soon I'll be out the other side.  That's interesting what you said about BMI too, I had read before that reducing weight can help, maybe that's why she called me obese with a BMI of 26   The thing I really don't like about this HRT business is that you end up feeling like a guinea pig, there isn't one answer that works for all women.  It's not like taking statins or insulin or something that they know works for particular illnesses.  Thanks again for taking the time to reply, it's helped to know that others feel the same 

[Fairywoods]

Hi Peripurple,  thanks for your reply and sorry you had awful experiences too, makes you really wonder about private 'specialists' and so lucky we still have the NHS.  Thanks for replying and take care 

[Mogster71]

Fairywoods, you are sounding a bit brighter today - I hope that's true

I think you are right about us feeling vulnerable. When you are feeling totally, utterly cr*p it is so easy and only natural to want to find that one thing which will take all the horrible stuff away. I am there too. I hope you can get sorted with a GP appointment when you are feeling ready to talk it through again x

[CLKD]

Did U go through your GP for the private appt.?  One should always get a letter of referral as a matter of courtesy.  It surprises me that any Consultant will see a patient without a referral letter.

Some GPs won't prescribe on the NHS if a person goes privately.  They have no necessity to do so. 

I would write to the Dr and tell her that you are very disappointed with the appt., that you needed advice about which HRT you probably require and that you don't feel supported.  Copy to the British Menopause Society.  There should be a code of conduct.

Make a list of your symptoms and talk to either your practice nurse or GP.  If necessary make a double appt. ;-).  Let us know!