Tc, I'm so sorry to hear a little of the history behind your BSO & I can well understand the conflicting feelings you have as a result. Mine happened at what was a very difficult time for me because of other stuff ongoing, so like you, I have unresolved issues I'm struggling to process.
I think the potential seriousness of ovarian cancer means if there is any doubt at all about the nature of a cyst - as there seems to have been with both you & I - removal of ovaries is always recommended.
I'm not sure whether the surgery plunged you into menopause or if like me you were already postmeno, but as mentioned earlier, I have nevertheless felt the effects of losing whatever output my ovaries were still making - especially, I suspect, Testosterone.
You mentioned the need to talk about it but that this thread is perhaps not the right place - maybe start a new one as you suggest if varying points of view would help, or if it would help to talk more privately to someone in a similar position, please send me a PM.