Hi TNM45689,
A diagnosis of osteoporosis doesn't necessarily mean you will fracture. I'm 63 and was diagnosed close to 10 years ago with fairly severe osteoporosis of the lumbar spine (hips were okay). I was devastated, as you must be. I was afraid to twist my body to look behind me as I was backing up my car, sure that my body would snap in two if I went too far. I pictured myself walking along and my back suddenly breaking and the top half of my body falling forward and dangling from my hips. I asked my doctor if there were things I could do to increase my bone density, and she actually said, “you can't increase bone without taking drugs.â€
So I went on a mission of researching osteoporosis, what it really means, how normal it is to lose bone mass with age, (even young people can have low bone density), etc., and I came across some very helpful books and web sites. I lurked around the National Osteoporosis Foundation web site's forum and learned a LOT about how to keep my bones healthy and flexible in spite of the diagnosis, along with other people's experiences with bone-building drugs. The book “The Myth of Osteoporosis†by Gillian Sanson might be useful for toning down some of the fear you must feel. The author doesn't necessarily claim that osteoporosis itself is a myth, but that there are many myths surrounding the “disease.†She doesn't advocate HRT in the book (published in 2003), still under the spell of the cancer threat. Of course, we now know that those ‘cancer scares' are mostly unfounded.
I never took bisphosphonates and I'm glad I never started, with all the bad press about them nowadays. I know some ladies here might disagree with me, but each to their own. I had quite a nasty fall not too long ago, landing on my hands and knees, and my first thought was “OMG! What did I break?†But I got up, dusted myself off, took inventory of my body, and carried on with just a few scrapes.
In no way am I suggesting that you not listen to your doctors, but knowledge is power. Learn all you can before deciding what path to take. I agree with Birdy that magnesium and boron are very essential to bone health, along with several other nutrients, diet, stress, and weight bearing/resistance exercise (Susie Hathaway's DVDs and web site may be useful here). You might also look into studies regarding prunes and bone health.
Anyway, best of luck to you, whatever you decide to do. Listen to your body, listen to your gut, and do lots of research.