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Menopause Matters magazine ISSUE 81 out now. (Autumn issue, September 2025)

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Author Topic: Anxiety...  (Read 7514 times)

jaypo

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #15 on: January 09, 2019, 09:06:46 PM »

Good for you jillm, I eventually had a huge battle with myself,told myself that this wasn't going to ruin my life, I have a nice life and anxiety was destroying it and me.its good to cry though,it's a release.
Keep fighting it girl,don't let it win
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Machair

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #16 on: January 10, 2019, 11:44:04 AM »

I am absolutely convinced that the anxiety is hormone related, but as yet not enough, if any, research has been done. With me I have it periodically, and then it goes away again, and is unrelated to anything I can find. I have had a late menopause and in many ways have been lucky, but I have higher oestrogen levels as my symptoms are very mild with relation to vaginal dryness or hot flushes, but I still have the anxiety especially in the morning.

My only theory is that oestrogen is at its lowest in the morning at around 5am, so even if you have a high level it will fall to its lowest then, and cortisol will be released to counteract this, and hence the burst of adrenaline and consequential panic feelings. A bad days will also see me having a churning stomach and sometimes a hasty toilet trip or two.Then it goes away again for a few weeks.

I think it is one of the worse symptoms as it can make you feel tired as well as wired all day. Sugar makes it worse- in my experience I think higher protein meals and lots of healthy foods is the way to go plus a good b complex and magnesium.
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NaturalMystic

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #17 on: January 10, 2019, 03:19:27 PM »

Sorry CLKD, but the kind of anxiety that's being talked about here is absolutely NOT normal, and you're not doing anyone any favours making that kind of statement. That 'it's just here for no reason whatsoever, and whatever i do or don't do it won't go away' feeling is very different from behaviourally based anxiety, which has a learned cause and can be treated with therapy. This is quite definitely a chemical thing, and no woman should be left feeling that there's no solution - there is a solution out there, it's just incredibly hard to find as it's so individual (and sorry everyone, I haven't found it yet)...All I know is, no-one should have to just accept living this way for years on end, it's not living, it's hell.
I remember saying two things to my Dr

1.  I'm waiting for the voices, I'm going crazy - Her response "if you were going crazy you wouldn't be worried about it"  :)

2. I am too busy being anxious about dying that I'm not living!  You are absolutely right, we shouldn't have to live this living hell
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jaypo

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #18 on: January 10, 2019, 03:24:24 PM »

Too busy worrying about tomorrow to enjoy today 😔
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NaturalMystic

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #19 on: January 10, 2019, 03:37:51 PM »

Too busy worrying about tomorrow to enjoy today 😔
Exactly that
I have suffered since the beginning of peri, 39.  Now 50

I can say that I have had long anxiety free periods during that time.
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jaypo

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #20 on: January 10, 2019, 03:48:12 PM »

I've only suffered it once a few months ago and it's just awful isn't it but I've always been a worrier,worse now that I'm older
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Roseneath

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #21 on: January 10, 2019, 04:03:30 PM »

I am being really strict with myself today.
1. Keep busy
2. Don't eat junk, stay hydrated, limit caffeine
3. Take supplements (Multi vit + Iron/Mg/Ca)
4. 30 minute jog/walk
5. 10 min Meditation App
6. Stay off media
7. Stop doing exercises to check I don't have a muscle wasting disease
8. Every time I have a negative thought I register it and bat it away......yeah right

Sounds so easy...I can only try the above because I had a goodish sleep last night and am not in my 10 day hormone meltdown stage of the month when my brain is eternally stuck on panic mode.


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NaturalMystic

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #22 on: January 10, 2019, 04:50:10 PM »

I hear you Birdy xx
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CLKD

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #23 on: January 10, 2019, 05:09:13 PM »

The waking hormone : Cortisol : can cause huge anxiety problems.  I would wake suddenly, deeply afraid. 

One cannot 'learn' to be anxious.  It's a physical reaction.
« Last Edit: January 10, 2019, 06:14:15 PM by CLKD »
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CLKD

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #24 on: January 10, 2019, 05:15:35 PM »

You learned to be worried.  Anxiety is physical and it doesn't take long for the physicality to be associated with the worry in the household.  We take on attitudes from our parents so immediately there's an upset, we go into survival mode.

Mine was violent.  I learned to duck from an early age  :'( : any raised voices or scowling looks would tightened the gut.  = nausea.  Even now, if Mum raises her voice out of my sight I get the same instant reaction :-\.  Nausea.  My ears feel like they are pricking up to catch what ever is being said.  I begin to shake. 

My elder cousin, raised in a similar atmosphere has Chron's disease  :-\.  We lived together until I was 3 years old.  I resolved not to be a shouty person when I married but it wasn't easy in the early years and OH the guilt  :-X.  DH called me 'the dragon'  :-\

Also, if I saw an emergency vehicle I would have the same reaction.  Until I worked in a Hospital  ::)
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racjen

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #25 on: January 10, 2019, 05:50:26 PM »

The waking hormone : Cortisol : can cause huge anxiety problems.  I would wake sudden, deeply afraid. 

One cannot 'learn' to be anxious.  It's a physical reaction.

That's just semantics and makes things even more confusing. Most people, and health professionals particularly, equate anxiety and over-worrying, they don't see the former as a physical thing, or if they do they assume it's triggered by thoughts ie worries. I've stopped using the word anxiety when I describe my symptoms because I think we need to make it clearer - this is FEAR, DREAD, a very physical feeling in the pit of the stomach as if there's a real danger around (which I agree, isn't learnt, it's a survival mechanism) - not a worry-based anxiety (which generally is learnt and can be unlearnt with techniques like CBT).

What's really confusing is that it seems it can be caused by low estrogen, high estrogen, progesterone intolerance, low testosterone.....and quite possibly a very finely tuned balance of all these is needed to alleviate it. And by the time you've got that worked out, if ever, you're probably through the worst of it anyway.
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CLKD

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #26 on: January 10, 2019, 06:20:22 PM »

Also the body can apparently become used to high levels of anxiety.  Read the recently but of course, can't remember where  >:(.  I was told in therapy in the 1990s that no one can have a panic attack that lasts for more than 20 mins. because the body can't sustain such high levels.  My longest panic attack was nearly 3 days  :'(.  We were out in a Theatre with friends and the nausea began.  I had to leave, felt really really ill on the way home and shock so badly that the bed moved.  Not easy, it was a 4-poster  :-\.  I couldn't eat.  Couldn't get out of bed, enjoy my bath ....... I can't remember how it stopped but I do remember the physicality of that night.

All my therapists and psychologists explained the correlation between flight/fight responses, but that didn't stop the anxiety taking over.  Still doesn't when it strikes.  Something to do with the auto ? reaction [must look it up].  I know it's natural.  I know why it happens.  But that doesn't stop it happening becaseu the physical feelings overwhelm me.

That early morning fear was pre-hensile, anytime after 3.30 and I would be deeply fearful.  I think I was afraid that I would harm myself  :-\ when alone.  Because I was so fed up with it all.  I even had nightmares so there was rarely a break for me.

It is unlike singing on stage, interview nerves, driving test nerves: because I suppose that I knew that once I got going, those nerves would settle. 
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suzysunday

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #27 on: January 10, 2019, 08:47:43 PM »

It is good to know that I am not alone with these horrible feelings.   Since a health scare 6 months ago, dealing with VA the last 2 and half years,  always been an anxious person and then a uti 4 months ago that would not settle, stress  building for months and the last few weeks turning to total dread and what feels like panic attacks that go on for hours.  I am frightened,  guilty of what  I am putting my partner through,  though he is wonderful and supportive. I can't get on with my life, plan on doing anything as the feelings are completely overwhelming.  It builds in the night like torture,  no proper sleep,  then the day  is almost impossible to get through.  I don't know what to do cos my life seems to be on hold.  I am very frightened.
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CLKD

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #28 on: January 10, 2019, 09:16:29 PM »

..... and breath.  Like you I felt as though I would never leave the house: never go shopping: never walk my dog ........ but with medication, a loving husband and a very good GP, I survived.  Though it was tuff at times  :'(

Believe what your OH tells you.  Put it to him/her and ask "Do you want us to split up?"  Mine was horrified at the thought.  He accepted that my depression, anxiety that floors me as well as VA are a part of Life.  Do not assume that they think as we do as guilt can drive us into the ground! and most would not be thinking but more worrying  ::)
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suzysunday

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Re: Anxiety...
« Reply #29 on: January 10, 2019, 09:32:28 PM »

I don't want to go on antidepressants. I came of seroxat 5 years ago after being on them 12 years. It was hell coming off them and I know if I took anything I would be on them for life.  I know my gp will just offer me amyltryptaline and I can't face going back there.
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