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[Tc]

This isn't about me just a general topic I would like to start and interested in your opinions and or experiences.re different generations attitude to "women's problems
For example:
My niece (23) has talked about her periods from day 1  to anyone and everyone including her grandad,  my dad, who I would never to this day talk about it to.
I remember one time I was out with him and I came on and needed 50p for the tampon machine cos I didn't have change. He kept asking why I needed it and in the end I just said it was for the machine in the toilets. He must've thought I wanted condoms but at the time I would rather he thought that!!
Fast forward to today with my mum (80) who finally told me just what she experienced with surgical meno at 43. Something she had kept to herself and probably still would have if I wasn't going through the same thing.
What do you all think about This? What are your experiences, thoughts and ideas

[racjen]

Yes, likewise - I wouldn't ever have felt comfortable talking about periods etc. with my parents, grandparents or anyone else (I'm 52) - it was as if these things just didn't happen. My daughters are 22 and 18, and they talk openly about their periods, sexuality etc. to anyone who's interested. I was however very very open with them about this stuff when they were little, sex was never a taboo subject and we still have a lot of very frank discussions between the three of us about topics like the mechanics of tampon use! I note though that the rate of uptake of smear tests has gone down drastically because so many 20 - 30 somethings are too embarrassed, and many are too embarrassed even to use the word vagina in front of a doctor. Very depressing...

[Conolly]

Hello ladies,

My Mum was a Registered Nurse and she was so embarrassed when I saw a tampon inside her drawer (I was 10 years old) that I thought she would faint. Needless to say, a couple of months later, I had my first period. I so wished she would talk to me about it, but all she said was 'Poor girl'. I'm 52 and talk openly about anything, life's too short.

Conolly X

[AgathaC]

I agree basically to all you three have said.
My parents were very open with me growing up and I was and still am very close to them BUT I would never have talked about periods or similar to my Dad. My mum and I can talk about everything (she is 74 and I am 46) including sex, albeit not about our own sex lives directly.
My daughter (17) is very open with anyone and everyone including my parents and talks at dinner about sex, periods, you name it.
I like it that way because I feel she can (and does) talk to me about anything. She also talks to my mum about this.
It's concerning about the smear tests. I wonder if (very wrongly) the news about the HPV vaccine has filtered incorrectly so that some young ladies don't think they need smears. Maybe an advertisement is required to remind all those 20-30's who missed it by a few years that they are as at risk as ever. My daughter had it and niece (19) but not my other niece (24) I think.

[Annie0710]

My mum was 36 when I was born and was always so open about things and very honest answering any questions I had.

She told me about sex (in a way I'd understand) and periods when I was about 10.  I lost my virginity at 16 to my older boyfriend but spoke to her first and she took me to the drs for contraception

When she was post menopause I was about 23 and she said she had no libido and was suffering vaginal dryness but my dad didn't understand so I sat him down and explained it to him !

Despite everything she was open about and having helped me post hysterectomy for total prolapse she failed to ever mention to me she was also suffering, but to a much worse extent, a nurse told me how bad it was as she was dying following a double brain haemorrhage:-(
X

[Conolly]

Oh Annie,

That's heartbreaking
 

Conolly X

[ariadne]

We werent a very open family. I remember when I was about 10 and watching TV with parents and brothers, something was mentioned in a programme about boys voices changing at puberty. I innocently asked my Mum if girls voices changed and was terribly embarrassed when she said no but pointed up her dress and said just other things happen up here. I was mortified in front of my Dad and brothers and vowed never to ask her anything like that again. I knew about periods from school and friends and had only wanted her to answer my question about boys voices 😁
When I excitedly told her my periods had started she just said Ugh..now you've got that to put up with for the next 40 years

My husband doesn't want to know about anything relating to "women's things"   and is extremely squeamish about anything medical, illness in general etc. We can never watch anything on TV involving illness or operations.

Ariadne xx

[CLKD]

Oh Great Thread!

I got my information from Mum.  A teacher.  I would read her womens magazines, problem pages and ask: what are periods etc..  She was always open and I was never embarrassed.  I began my first bleed the day after feeling very ill, 16 August 1965.  We were at my Gran's who had an outside toilet 'across the yard'  - we had nowt.  We used tissues and an old pair of knickers.  Then my Dad wanted to visit a friend of his on the way home  .  So I waddled around.

In senior school we had sex lessons  - not.  Friends whose Mums wouldn't talk about sex would ask me questions which I took back to Mum who gave me the answers to return with  .  Can't remember talking to my younger sister at all.   Dad would never talk about it to me. 

Monthlies
The Curse
That time of the Month
Rags ...........

I do remember visiting a friend and having my period and didn't dare tell her Mum  who found the used sanitary napkins in the suitcase, I was going to take them home for burning. 

[Dancing Queen]

My Mum was open about periods, I remember about 6 months before I started (I don`t know how she knew it was going to happen) she went and bought some plasticky inder knicker things which attached to a pad with poppers - does anyone remember those? I thought yuck I don`t fancy that much. They were horrible and rustled like an incontinence rubber bed sheet when you walked! Loved it when the stick on pads were invented although they were enormous and like having a saddle between your legs!!   

[Katejo]

I remember those Dancng Queen! And pads with belts. Crikey!
My mum and dad were awful. They never discussed much at all and periods, emotional issues, relationships, sex were all considered distasteful and were avoided.
I doubt my parents had sex much at all. Whenever something even mildly saucy came on tv they would tut loudly and change channel.
I found out about sex through a friend and didn't believe her. I couldn't imagine why a boy would put his willy inside a girl. And i didn't even know I had anywhere to accommodate a willy. I thought I had a pee hole and nothing else. Our sex ed was a short film featuring a girl sitting in a field holding a flower, approached by a boy of  similar age, who was clearly attracted to her as it showed his enlarged pupils. Ridiculous. Then it became more factual with medical anatomical illustrations of female reproductive organs and penis, and ultimately, a newborn baby. God forbid same sex relationships!
 So, no open chats and loving conversations about love, sex, desire and bodily functions for me. MOre like a pensive, uptight, miserable and fraught self discovery, via some rather alarming and distressing realisations.
I don't have kids. But I am very open about most things. I like talking, I dislike secrecy and one of my pet hates in any relationship I have is a lack of communication. I'd like to think I'd have made a real effort to have children who were clued up, relaxed, interested in life and their own bodies, and open to relationships with people they liked very much.

  My Mum made a point of telling me about periods when I was 9-10 years old. She then used Dr White's with a belt and I remember thinking that I didn't fancy those. I started with them when my period started at 13 but soon  switched to the pads with a strip to stick inside your pants and later to Tampax. I never discussed periods with my Dad but my first ever one started at school and he had to take me home to get clean clothes.

[CLKD]

I think we need to be respectful about periods etc., factual, to the point.  I think that our young people need to regain respect!

I try to be open with the girls next door but feel embarrassed when it's discussed in front of their Dad  .  It's my age.  I suppose.  Now give me a box about menopause 

[Katejo]

My Mum was open about periods, I remember about 6 months before I started (I don`t know how she knew it was going to happen) she went and bought some plasticky inder knicker things which attached to a pad with poppers - does anyone remember those? I thought yuck I don`t fancy that much. They were horrible and rustled like an incontinence rubber bed sheet when you walked! Loved it when the stick on pads were invented although they were enormous and like having a saddle between your legs!!

I really didn't like that feeling of a 'saddle' between the legs! In the late 80's I took part in a  short summer holiday seaside  trip away for young people with learning disabilities. I looked after a young woman who still lived at home with her Mum due to her disability. On the   sunday morning she came to find me in the early hours. She woke me and told me that her period had started. Her Mum hadn't packed any sanitary pads for her and I think I only had tampax which she had never used. The organisers of the holiday were men and hadn't thought to bring any. I had to explain the problem to them.  We drove round the small town looking for a shop that was open on a Sunday so that I could buy some pads  for her.

[CLKD]

Similar happened when I went abroad, for some reason all the girls came on within a few days and not all were prepared. 

I can remember the padding between the legs .......... 

[Katejo]

Similar happened when I went abroad, for some reason all the girls came on within a few days and not all were prepared. 

I can remember the padding between the legs .......... 

My 2nd ever period came 2 months after the first and I was at guide camp in an isolated field. The guide leader had only brought 1 pack of pads with her......!    OK i should have had my own with me but I was new to it and not yet regular.

[Tc]

Loved reading your replies ladies. X