Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Taz2]

As my mum used to say "getting old is difficult but the alternative is much worse" 

Having lost three friends in the last two years - all of whom didn't make the 60 milestone I am learning to appreciate each day I am here but it is hard to embrace the new "us" sometimes.

Taz x

[Conolly]

Hello,


Well said, my Mum used to say the same.


I can relate to the 'losing your looks' frustration, but in the end it's about how you feel. Some ladies look terrific after face & neck lift, hormones and make-up but that is not enough to make them  feel good. Sometimes all it takes is a little faith in Mother Nature, getting older should go along with getting wiser.

[Joaniepat]

My mum used to say that "old age is not for wimps", but she was referring to the concomitant ailments I guess. Jillydoll has the right idea, confidence is the key. I've never had that much in the way of natural assets, so have always been used to making the best of what there is. There's even less now  .
JP x

[dulciana]

Confidence, fulfillment and happiness.   

[CLKD]

The less time spent looking in the mirror, the more I can do 'stuff' ;-)

[Daisydot]

Dulciana if beauty comes from the heart then you are drop dead gorgeous 😉

[ElkWarning]

I really struggle with this.  I never was a looker, so to speak, but I was skinny and agile and full of life.  I don't feel like that now, and it's all a bit strange, considering I recently did a degree, an MA, got a good job, promoted twice in three years … I was saying to my husband last night that I remember wrestling with a poem (I'm an arty type) about my mother 20 years ago, I was trying to convey what her face looked like, and I came up with the line that it was 'wet washing'.  I have her face.  I'm not fantastically happy about the spare tyre (cycling 50 miles a week for two years did nothing, a mainly plant based diet did nothing) or the aches and pains either.  I never planned to grow old gracefully, but I just don't feel comfortable in my body any more, it's as if it's not really mine.

[CLKD]

Elk - welcome.   As oestrogen levels drop muscles may become lax = aches and pains, also that's what causes the flabby skin under the arms as well as the apron dropping.  Mine 'went' in about 3/4 days a few years ago.  From above I look fat but I haven't put on any weight.  Very little can be done about that but do keep exercising.  No exercise is a waste of time!

[Emerald2017]

I think that when we are focused on our appearance we lose the confidence and the charm our personality has.
When I diagnosed with early meno a year ago, I was obsessed with how I look and what that means for my self esteem and my confidence.
 I realize that many things are in our mind. I try not to compare myself with younger ladies. I exercise daily, I have a clean diet and try to avoid stress. I started a romantic relationship a few months ago and it gives me such a courage to go on and appreciate the things that I have in my life.
Life is for living!

[Joaniepat]

What a lovely post Emerald2017, you have the right attitude! I wish you all the best in your new relationship.
JP x

[Emerald2017]

Thank you Joan! 💐

[dulciana]

Dulciana if beauty comes from the heart then you are drop dead gorgeous 😉

Thank you, Daisydot - that's kind! 

[Wilks]

I think what's hard is that it doesn't happen gradually. One minute you're full of life and literally- wham! You've dropped through a trapdoor into hell. I know I keep saying this but I'm in shock because I thought we grew old more gradually!

However, the way you look reflects how you feel inside. Being severely depressed and anxious for months on end, crying a lot, and not sleeping did nothing for my looks. I look a lot better now than I did in January 

[Emerald2017]

Hi Wilkes! I think that it is gradually but we cannot see it, after 35 we start to lose our estrogen and after 45 the change is more obvious.
And when we reach meno things are too hard! My theory is that nature simply don't need us for reproduction, so it is time not to live anymore. Our body cannot survive without estrogen for longtime. I think that menopause isn't natural. I mean that it is natural as process but not natural regarding the survival. And a natural process isn't always a positive process. Just some thoughts of me...
As for our appearance it is more complicated. I see ladies in their 50 who have a very good appearance and young girls in their 30 who haven't. I think that it is more an attitude. Our psychology plays a huge role.

[Wilks]

Hi Emerald, I have the same thoughts as you. I think that evolution and a longer life expectancy hasn't served women very well. If only we didn't have to lose everything when we lose our fertility. To suddenly find ourselves with so many physical problems as well as low mood and anxiety when we may have another 30 years or more to live is really awful.
My youngest child is at high school, I have a demanding job, a mortgage to pay, and a body to keep fit and healthy. I can't suddenly tell the world that I can no longer function! I'm totally reliant on HRT, antidepressants and testosterone. I have to think positively though, because I spent 6 months telling myself that I wasn't designed to live beyond 48 and so I was suicidal. The only reason I'm still here is because I have a husband and children- it's for them just as much for myself that I take all these hormones and antidepressants.