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[Herbie73]

So I have just been discussing my fears with my husband and daughter(she's 25) and they asked do yo think the Drs are lying to you, I replied yes, they said why? I said I don't think they are being up front with me and hiding something that looks more serious on the scan, they replied why would they do that the don't care if you go for follow up treatment or not as long as they have sent you for the right tests, they said not only am I anxious I am also paranoid and need help, I can see were they are coming from, but I can't shake this fear, I'm really trying but it's so hard, I'm addicted to google, I really don't know how to handle this, the weird thing is I am no longer spotting which is strange, I have been so stressed lately, I'm wondering if I messed my cycle up, I'm really trying to keep it together, if any ladies on here have gone through this, with the added health anxiety, please could you reply and let me know how things went.


Herbie

[CLKD]

Do you want to have something serious?  Do you really believe a GP would be bothered to tell lies?  You are lucky to get repeated appts., here we have to wait at least 5 days between appts.. within the Surgery.  Your GP is busy.  Once you go out that door he is thinking about the next patient/phone call/bad news that he has to impart.  As a medical secretary I can tell you how busy they are! 

Are you asking in the hope that a lady here will come on having had a serious illness diagnosed which a Doctor missed?  Some ladies here have had serious conditions, some that will never be cured but they press on.  Chronic illness is difficult to deal with, both for the sufferer and surrounding family.  When physicality hits me I find it hard to believe what anyone suggests because I feel so ill.  But if I follow orders, i.e. medications, relaxation, they are in general, right. 

One doesn't mess up a hormonal cycle easily!  Nature does what She does.  As we go into menopause naturally oestrogen levels drop off, it's The Change.  Maybe keep a mood/food/symptom diary, it might help focus your mind.

Why hasn't your Husband removed the computer/lap top, whatever?? from the house to stop you going onto GOOGLE?  Why aren't you listening to him? 

You need to get a grip.  We have a calendar here, his/hers - if the appts. aren't on the calendar then we forget!   However, should I forget an appt at the Surgery the GP would ring me 

[CLKD]

Good advice Sonka.  Something her husband ought to have done!

[Snoooze]

Herbie, this is not at all healthy. You are posting these same questions on the No More Panic website.

Get off the computer, get out in the fresh air and live your life. I have had health anxiety for 20 years. I do not let it control my life like you are doing. It sounds like you need a psychiatric assessment if you are now believing Dr's are lying to you.

[Herbie73]

Thank you ladies, I believe I do need to see a therapist, as this happens to me every couple of years, I making my family miserable, I really think I have severe health anxiety, that needs addressing, I feel so lonely and scared, my family are wonderful, my mum has health anxiety and so does my daughter( that's my fault),my mums dad also suffered with it avoided the Drs like the plague, I have a very long line of mental health problems in my family, I try to avoid Drs but in the end I give in, I hate any test, they make me go into panic mode, I always fear the worst, I need to address this problem I know, I'm sorry I'm probably getting on people's nerves, but when you have health anxiety you try to seek reassurance that works for maybe a day, then you start dr googling again and get yourself in to a state again, it's a vicious circle I need to break, while I'm writing this I'm sobbing my heart out, because my youngest daughter has gone to a concert and normally I constantly check to see if she's ok, it took my husband to say that I hadn't even text her yet, I feel so selfish and yet I'm the most unselfish person you would ever meet. Thanks ladies

Herbie xxx

[Mary G]

Herbie, do you think you have a cancer phobia?  It sounds like you could have, it is very common and it doesn't just affect women, just as many men of all ages suffer from this phobia thinking everything is a sign of cancer.

Do you find that your health anxiety shifts i.e. you get reassurance on one thing and them move your anxiety to another?

[aspie65]

Herbie, I get health anxiety too so I really feel for you.  It is a real struggle to get it under control especially when investigations are ongoing.  I hope you get the all clear soon so you can calm down.

[Herbie73]

Thanks ladies, yes I defiantly have a cancer phobia, every symptom I get always turn into the big c, 4 years ago I went through a Breast cancer phobia, that lasted about 3 months, I was convinced something was growing in my boob, even though the Drs checked and said every thing was healthy, it took ages for me to get over it, then I had a couple of blips in between, then at the beginning of this year I thought my husband had lung cancer because he had a cough for 3 months, when my girls were young any symptom they had I always thought it was leukaemia or some rare child hood cancer, I can't ever think logical, I think it may stem from when I was 16 my grandad had lung cancer(smoked for 50 years and worked with asbesto), after he died I went to see him in the chapel of rest and he looked terrible and at played on my mind for ages, also my mum has always feared cancer, she hasn't had a smear test since she was 37 she is now 63 , she was always scared of the results, my dad also had a breakdown in his thirties because he thought he had cancer, he was actually bed ridden go about 4 weeks, so as you can see I have seen a lot of cancer anxiety over the years.

Thanks
Herbie

[CLKD]

Phobias can take over  ......... for years I had no relief, as mine gave me nightmares.

So what do you plan to do to over-haul your reaction to your thought patterns?  It can be years B4 one gets an appt. for mental health assistance.  I didn't find 'no panic' any use to me when I spoke on the 'phone in the 1990s.  They repeated words from the various self-help books around at the time .......... 

I had cancer.  Still here!  I have anxiety - without the emergency pill I wouldn't be here.  My first panic attack was at age 3.  My anxiety when going for breast diseased treatment was that panic attacks would stop me attending: adrenaline got me through.

Stop comparing yourself with your relatives!  Each 1 of us reacts differently - if we were all in the same room each one would have a different version of what happened.  Do you know anyone that has had treatment for cancer?  Have you supported anyone going through treatment?  It's often what we don't know that freaks us out. 

Maybe have a time that you put to one side: 10 mins. each morning and 10 mins. B4 your evening meal: to think about how you have felt in the night and during the day.  Then get on with something else.  Does your husband work?

[Herbie73]

I'm so sorry you had cancer, I feel really guilty now, I just find it hard to cope with these situations, I feel really selfish now, I hope you are well, I really have the biggest heart, but when I'm in these situations, this is how react, with fear and anxiety, I'm not comparing myself to my family, but I have learnt over many years how they deal with it, and that's why I react the way they do, I'm so sorry xxxx

[Herbie73]

And yes I have supported some one going through cancer and yes my husband and myself work, we are still in our 40s, I ant help the way I feel,if I could change it I would xxx

[Charys]

You can't help the way you feel at the moment, but you CAN change the way you react to how you feel. YOU can start building skills that will help you through this, and making positive changes to your behaviour which will start the process of recovering. Waiting for mental health services might take time - go onto No More Panic and look at their booklist. There are listed there self-help books about health anxiety. You could also do a search for Health Anxiety books on Amazon, and then filter them by star rating. There are some good ones on there. You need to do something, only you have the power to make changes here. Even CBT isn't a magic cure, you have to be committed to it, work hard, do homework and really train yourself to change your thought processes. Whats the harm on trying some self-help now?

As for having a 'cancer phobia'; surely most people are terrified of cancer - I know I am. It stretches you to the limit of how far you can cope, it is incredibly tough physically at times going through treatment, but mostly it is so very challenging psychologically. However, people get through it however they can, and have to accept it (as they have no choice).

What I don't understand is this - if your sole purpose in doing for tests and scans is to be told everything will alright, everytime, then that seems a pointless exercise. Scans and tests, particularly screening, are about finding things early so that they can be treated. Would you not rather find something early and have it treated ? BTW I'm NOT saying your doctor is lying, or that you have cancer!

[Herbie73]

Thank you charys , I will , I will see what they have thank you xxxx

[Herbie73]

Thank you., I will have a read xxx

[Herbie73]

Morning ladies, I've been having terribl night sweats this week, I'm not sure if it's perimenopause, or my anxiety, I haven't bleed all week and it seems to coincide with that, I think the reason I'm unsure I'm going through peri, is my hormone levels came back normal, but I don't think they checked esterogen and progesterone, it seems like my symptoms relate to low progesterone, anyone knowledgable in this.

Many thanks
Herbie xxx