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[lesley998]

Lizab....I remember when the frozen shoulder started thinking I had some awful bone disease...it was so flippin painful.  Didn't link it to peri.  My ESR levels were not raised, no inflammation and I went to doc before it was in frozen stage so he didn't work it out either.   I also remember trying to get up onto the couch for my smear with the nurse practitioner, and wincing a lot,  and telling her all about it...she said 'you've got menopausal tendonitis..or frozen shoulder' turned out she was doing some sort of research and knew more about it than most.  It's when the lack of estrogen cause the tendons to get dry and brittle...very common first symptom of meno, it's like the tin man seizing up.  Apparently its unheard of in Japanese women! Soy perhaps.  Anyway...it ran its course, and the physical issues all cleared up too eventually...I've just been left with the head stuff. Deep joy.

[lesley998]

Annie0710.... thank you x

[CLKD]

Mental Health can certainly 'run' in families.  Which is why I am aware of mine and can see traits in my sister.  That's on the paternal side.  My Maternal health history is also a worry, really I don't have any genealogy that means I should survive but I do.  Because I know it can be better.

Sadly there aren't any blood tests to find out how our mental health is and how we are likely to react to the various medications, certainly some can do exactly the opposite of what they are designed for      So having somewhere to 'run' to is important when these feelings threaten to take over.  I used to sit in my Surgery Waiting Room when I felt a danger to myself, they would make me a cuppa and allow me 'time'.  That's where MIND walk-in centres may be useful.

[Lizab]

Initially I thought I was sleeping wrong, but no matter what I did it didn't improve. Some overly-concerned girls in my mommy group gave me grief over turning my daughter forward facing in the carseat at 18 months instead of after two years. The law was for 1 year, and I did plan on longer, but I couldn't get her in and out of the rear facing seat because I couldn't extend my arm! Research told me it was frozen shoulder, and the first lasted about 6 weeks if I remember. A few months later the other shoulder did it, and didn't go quite as long but roughly the same.

The things we have to deal with

[lesley998]

Thanks all for the link to Prof.Studd. I can't believe what I'm reading, it's just ME.   Reproductive hormonal history....blissfully happy in pregnancy then dreadful PND kicked in a few months after birth, and my subsequent menopausal anxiety/ depression described to a T.  It's definitely hormonal.  I don't think it is logistically possible to see Prof Studd on a regular basis  (I'm as far north as it gets without icebergs) but I will call his office and see if I can have a phone consultation or if they can recommend a consultant a bit closer to home.  Feeling cautiously optimistic that I might be able to do something about this living nightmare.

Thanks for all the comments and help.
You're such a lovely bunch x

[lesley998]

...coincidentally, had an appointment early this morning with young male GP to discuss meds and repeat prescription of fluoxetine.  I mooted the idea of my chronic and severe cyclical anxiety being hormonal and should I be rethinking medication, including HRT.  I was quickly told that I have a generalised anxiety disorder which responds well to the current medication and if it aint broke why fix it.  I said, but I am broke, there are three weeks of my life that come on repeat where I genuinely fear I might take my own life.  I didn't feel like this before menopause, and there could be a genetic predisposition.  Can't remember the exact words but basically was told I was focussing too much on what my sister did and I'm a different person etc...keep taking the tablets dear.

I've tried the female GP but she just pushes Premarin which made me feel even worse and gave me visual migraines.   I've come to terms with the fact I'm never going to get any help from the NHS. I'm on my own with this (apart from you girls) and that's the most frightening thing of all.

Does anyone know how you actually find someone to listen to you?   It's as simple as that.  Apart from the Prof in London, and logistically seeing him, even thinking about arranging to see him will just be a nightmare which as anyone with this hellish condition knows is just another mountain in front of me.  Flights I can't afford etc.  I wonder if I can consult him from a distance.  Repeating last nights rather more optimistic post...sorry.

Thank god I'm out of my dip at the moment or I would be under the covers self medicating with a bottle of wine.  I just feel so lost, frustrated and can feel the panic rising that I'm in a bubble and no one can hear me.

[CLKD]

Your GP needs a  .......... I ring the Practice Manager to state that the Staff simply aren't listening and follow it up with a letter stating the same. Then I would also ring Prof Studd's Office and see what is available and you can send an e-mail to Dr Currie on here, details available somewhere on the Forum. Of course GPs don't have to listen  . 

You could visit a local Pharmacist too.  Most have private rooms.  Ask the questions!?!

With regard to the GP's off-hand comment that you aren't your sister, he clearly hasn't read the risks of sibling death following a suicide in the family.   .  You are at risk .......... unless a sibling doesn't show any signs of depression or anxiety.  Maybe press for a referral to a Psychiatrist, ring the Surgery and Speak to the PM and tell her that you really do need support right now.

I don't know if there are any on-line references to Dr Kathleen Dalton's work in the 1980s ....... she did lots of research etc. regarding PMS!!

You know that this is cyclic. You also know that your Practice members aren't listening.  Do you have other Surgeries within travelling distance?

[lesley998]

Im a bit of a woos CLKD.       I could no more complain to the Practice Manager than fly in the air.  It would just cause me more grief and I just don't want to go there.       So I'll just move on.   I'm aware that this cowardly attitude doesn't help others in a similar situation - we need to bring this to the fore and highlight the failings...but right now, it can't be my crusade.    I just crumple at the thought of any extra stress.  Maybe when I'm well.

I will however call Prof. Studd's office for advice. 

I don't have a hell of a lot of faith in GP's.  They only know what they know.  Years ago when I was 38  I had an episode of severe palpitations and anxiety and to cut a long story short, at one appointment I asked the doc to listen to my heart.  I had a history of anxiety (always have, highly strung) and he point blank refused, lest he reinforce my hypochondria. Told me I was an over stressed single parent.  I said I'm stressed because you won't listen to me or my heart,  banging around in my chest.   (I have had no luck with GPs) I spent about three weeks feeling like I had a small animal running around in my chest, and felt absolutely dreadful....firing on one cylinder. Long story short, collapsed, and turned out I had a faulty heart valve coupled with having had an infected tooth out ....caused my heart to go a bit haywire.  Now I have been left with a LBBB (bundle block, doesn't cause any problems) but I DID complain to the NHS about this man, I always remember his sitting on the edge of my bed in the hospital (I was in coronary care for three weeks)  pulling at his collar and saying he was sorry and was there anything he could do.  I just said yes, listen to a 38 year old woman complaining of heart symptoms.   Thats why I feel in a bubble.  They are just people like us, not magicians and Im on my own with this.  Again.  its like flipping groundhog day.

[Annie0710]

Lesley I think (well almost guarantee) that the dr you mean in London will do a phone consult with you especially as you live so far away.  Give the clinic a call and see what they say, so sad your Drs are naff

[lesley998]

No answers Lesley998, just someone who can totally empathise.   

S x

Thanks Sparkle.  You know how much it means  x

[lesley998]

Lesley I think (well almost guarantee) that the dr you mean in London will do a phone consult with you especially as you live so far away.  Give the clinic a call and see what they say, so sad your Drs are naff

Thank you xx

[CLKD]

You are certainly not a whooossss ....... when I was deeply depressed I couldn't vocalise my needs, also I feared that the GP would tell me that there was nothing more he could offer or that he would stop my emergency medication, without which ........  -

GPs are that - they either didn't want to be or weren't clever enough (ducks) to be Consultants.  I worked with many who choose front-line GP work because they liked a challenge  .  I worked with Consultants who didn't listen and for a few who were lovely.  That gave me ammunition to go in with all guns blazing if I didn't get what I required (once the depression was sorted).  Realising that they sit on the loo exactly as I need to do .........

If my GP doesn't appear to be listening - remembering that he has 100s of issues to deal with and then there is the paper work for the Government of the day; I make another appt. a couple of weeks later and go in "I don't think I was listening last time, can you remind me ....... " - it usually works ;-). 

What was the question again .......  ..........

[lesley998]

You are certainly not a whooossss ....... when I was deeply depressed I couldn't vocalise my needs, also I feared that the GP would tell me that there was nothing more he could offer or that he would stop my emergency medication, without which ........  -

GPs are that - they either didn't want to be or weren't clever enough (ducks) to be Consultants.  I worked with many who choose front-line GP work because they liked a challenge  .  I worked with Consultants who didn't listen and for a few who were lovely.  That gave me ammunition to go in with all guns blazing if I didn't get what I required (once the depression was sorted).  Realising that they sit on the loo exactly as I need to do .........

If my GP doesn't appear to be listening - remembering that he has 100s of issues to deal with and then there is the paper work for the Government of the day; I make another appt. a couple of weeks later and go in "I don't think I was listening last time, can you remind me ....... " - it usually works ;-). 

What was the question again .......  ..........

Lol!

Yes. We are quite a small community (genuinely, my current young GP went to school with my wayward son, although they didn't socialise and we didn't know each other.   Just makes me all the more aware of my failings as a parent though...my son was in prison, someone else's lad up the road is now my GP...yay) and I totally agree with the not listening bit.  He seems to glaze over wen I'm in front of him, perhaps he genuinely doesn't know what to do with me.   I've an awful feeling that I am actually waffling on and to anyone else I sound a bit nuts, but on here I can say it all and you get it.

[CLKD]

Oh don't get me started on the 'glazing over'  .  Some really have no idea! and I do wonder why they went into medicine at all.  Maybe it over-whelms them and they don't like to ask for advice?!?  Perhaps go in and say "Could you ask amongst your colleagues and the drug companies how others deal with apparently neurotic women when they present at menopause so that we can work together for a good result?" 

Your son on the 'right' road now?    .......... I've never met anyone with a connection to a person who has been behind bars - does that make me odd, new topic perhaps ........ and I've met 1 child who was adopted ........ maybe I've led a sheltered existence 

[CLKD]

I've started a thread on Dr Dalton too ......... crikey, look at the time, not a child in the house washed