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[Henckenstein]

Hello Everybody 
I'm a 49y-o woman who first noticed signs of perimenopause in 2011.
I've been absolutely fine, and in fact felt quite excited & liberated at the prospect of Life Beyond Fertility, but around Christmas last year things changed.
I'd been experiencing hot flushes -my only symptom apart from lack of periods- for a few years, but never to the point of having my sleep seriously disrupted; the mild discomfort was bearable.
Around Christmas however I began to experience vaginal dryness for the first time. Despite feeling turned on & wanting sex, my nether regions weren't complying, which I found pretty troubling. 
I was also suddenly seeing dramatic changes in the texture of my skin, and my hair was suddenly very thin too.
Plus I was feeling 'wrong' ...It was hard to be sure what was causing what, because there are a lot of challenging situations in my life atm (as with anybody I know) but I was feeling low in energy, lacking in ambition or motivation, fuzzy-headed and depressed. 
I started to belatedly read about menopause & got really worried about osteoporosis. Apparently I fit all the high-risk criteria, except for prolonged use of corticosteroids.
So concern about bone density was what finally compelled me to see my GP & ask about HRT. In truth it was mainly the vaginal dryness & the old lady skin though.
Sex & vanity basically. 
The GP at my group practice sent me for blood tests & gynae exams first (I'd told her about a bleed I had in October last year, 2 years after my last real period).
Blood tests confirm that I'm post menopausal & that I'm also very Vit D defficient. Gynae exams showed everything's hunky dory, for which I'm super grateful.
Having had these results, my GP was prepared to discuss HRT.
In common with the experience of other posters, my GP knows nothing about HRT.
She had a flick through her Mimms & said "Oh I think a lot of ladies like Kliovance, let's put you on that"
A week down the line & I'm both murderous & suicidal. 
I feel appalling. 
I suffered from depression earlier in my life, have been (touch wood) fine for the last decade, but now i feel as bad as I've ever done.
My mood is horribly low. I'm even having suicidal thoughts.   
Plus I feel aggressive and irritable.
No, make that aggressive and ANGRY. 
I very nearly ended my relationship this morning.
The fogginess in my brain - which has been severely hampering my working life, as well as my attempts to research the menopause & all that goes with it - has got even worse, and my energy is zero. I feel that I just haven't got it in me to do anything.
I started googling Kliovance, and that's what brought me to this site, and the revelation that as many as  1 IN 5 WOMEN ARE PROGESTERONE INTOLERANT, and I'm pretty sure I'm one of them.
I remember when I was 18 having terrible problems when I went on the pill for the first time. I tried different pills again in my 20s but each time I got so badly messed up that I had to stop.
I figure now that it was to do with the progestogen in those combined pills, and that this is what is going on now with the progestogen (noresthisterone) in Kliovance.
Going back to the doctor this afternoon... My fuzzy-headed googling has not done much but increase my sense of dread about the options available to progestogen intolerant women, but as we are 1 in 5 I'm hopeful that there's a load of experience, strength, hope & knowledge available from my sister-members of this forum.
If you've bothered to read this far then thank you, I'd love to hear from you about your experience, especially if you are progesterone intolerant & have found a manageable solution.

[CLKD]

>wave< - well you now know that your GP ain't up to scratch on HRT in that she/he hasn't listened to you!  Pretty 'normal' sadly.  Browse round. Make notes. Decide which symptoms you want to ease first.  Maybe have a chat with a Pharmacist about which Surgery in your area supports HRT and if there is a Practice Nurse, make an appt..

If you were dry it is unlikely that everything is 'hunky dory'  - have a browse on our vaginal atrophy threads and think about trying treatment for it?  For me it was like razor blades up there    .  Even now penetration is difficult and painful at times so I do a 're-load' of Ovestin1mg which re-plumps the tissues down there.

Stop the HRT.  The intense feelings should ease, they will pass.  HORMONES  .  Let us know how you get on?

Some ladies find that keeping a mood/food/symptom diary useful.  If you put 'progesterone' into the search button above current threads should pop up!

 

[Henckenstein]

Thanks for your reply CLKD, it's really helpful to feel connected to people who've been there/ are there.

At least this GP made an effort - when I went 2 years ago I saw a male GP who insisted there was no blood test that could determine whether I'd gone through menopause, and who seemed to think I was talking about IVF when I asked about HRT - he said I wasn't eligible because I already had a chlld 

I will stop the Kliovance, but was going to discuss other options because I'm concerned about osteoporosis - a lot of it in my female rellies -  and also about fact that I've visibly aged 5 years since Christmas - my body seems devoid of collagen & it's really showing in my skin. That's pretty depressing

Thanks for the food/mood/diary tip, will give that a go.

I'll check out the progesterone threads when I get bak from the Dr... Hope I don't murder anyone on the way 

[MicheleMaBelle]

Hi Henck- you could be me! Stop the Kliovance. Ask for referral to menopause clinic or pay for private consultant if you can. Sounds like progesterone intolerance and if you're like me , you might even have problems with the utrogestan ( bio- identical, better tolerated but still having problems. I'm only a few weeks into new regime and I've been told to give it 3 months. when I go back to see consultant I'm going to askif I can reduce from daily dose tosomething else under supervision. I had same problem with pill and Kliovance was a nightmare. I felt exactly the same. I was puton Everol conti- same issues and in desperation halved patch. Flushes returned but I felt better than I had in ages. Look at preps on site and go back to doc fully armed. Otherwise get a private appointment to save you messing about with GPs that don't know what they're doing. it's such a pity that we need to resort to this but you can't go on feeling the way you do.Let us know how you get on x

[Henckenstein]

Thanks a million for that Michelemabelle... it's amazing how much better I feel knowing that you & others know how I feel!
I've just got back from the Dr's.
I gave her back the Kliovance & asked for a referral to a menopause clinic. She said it takes between 3 & 6 months for the appointment to come through & meanwhile would I like some seroxat (paroxetine)

I said NO.

Right now I feel most peculiar. I guess the closest thing to what I'm experiencing would be 'Roid Rage - not that I've ever had it, but I've seen it.
I feel like committing mass murder whilst crying my eyes out.
 Last dose of Kliovance was 8.30 this morning. Dr said it will be out of my system in 48 hours.
Is she right? How long did it take for you to feel 'normaller' again?

Thanks again to you and to CLKD for your replies.
It really helps

[CLKD]

Don't know how long it will take ........ and breath  this too will pass.   Get a thick pillow and bang it hard, don't do what I used to - kick doors  ......... hurts as well as causing damage 

ADs are not the first line of treatment, GPs have been sent NICE guidelines but it appears that many simply haven't bothered to up-date themselves.  Also they have NO idea about the variance that ladies suffer  .  It's not called 'the change' for nowt!

As for waiting, if you can afford to pay for a referral then do so.  3-4 months is probably 'about right' but it's a long time when we need relief from symptoms.

As for osteoporosis, maybe get a DEXA scan?  In the mean time, brisk walking when possible, plenty of good quality fruits and veg., tinned and frozen too, keep hydrated and get plenty of VitD ;-)

[Mary G]

Henckenstein, I am also very intolerant to all types of progesterone used in HRT preparations and to Utrogestan to a lesser extent.  I was never intolerant to my own progesterone, just the artificial stuff and I never really felt good on the pill, I had a constant nasal drip, weight gain and endless allergies.  It is a problem if you can't take progesterone and it makes HRT difficult.  I now take a very small dose of Utrogestan (vaginally) with Oestrogel under supervision and I can just about live with it for now but I will have to face a hysterectomy eventually.

My advice would be a seek the help of a menopause specialist as soon as possible.  Depending on how you are placed financially, it might be seeing a private specialist as suggested by CLKD to speed things up. 

[MicheleMaBelle]

hello henck-good advice ( as always from CLKD )
I messed about for ages with GO and I paid 150 quid a month ago for my private gyny appt. I wish I had done it ages ago.I'm not convinced his initial treatment plan is for me but I've got access to him if need be and a follow up appointment booked for June. He was happy for me to go on his NHS list but although I could get initial appointment within 12 weeks, follow ups were 10 months. Well,stuff that. I'm paying for it privately. As I'm now on bioidentical oestrogen and progesterone it really was what I wanted my GP to prescribe but I think it might have taken me another 6 months to get there.I thought it would be a magic bullet.So far it.hasn't and I'm now absolutely convinced that progesterone is my nemesis. Stopped the Kliovance. Used the Everol patches and was climbing the walls with both. Within 2-3 days of halving the patches I still didn't feel 100% but felt better than I had since starting HRT - all points to one thing doesn't it? Especially given your history.If you can afford it, go private but bear in mind that you still need to give it time and its trial and error I regret to say. You are not mad- less so now,but really in the past, I wanted to batter people and I felt so full of rage and anger ( I'm Scottish so what do you expect? )
Aren't we such a bunch of charmers!

And unless you really need them ( and some do and find them really beneficial ) tell your GP that you will leave the ADs for the time being! x Bloody clueless some of them

[CLKD]

  and Well Said!

One might think that paying for treatment is expensive but hey, we can't take our monies with us.  If we don't have any immediate 'necessary' payments then go for it.  If we keep our monies for 'future', someone will pay inheritance tax etc. or the Government of the day will benefit ;-).

[MicheleMaBelle]

in case you think I'm an illitirate ( ha ha ) numpty. I can actually spell.And type. Fat fingers and small phone
Apologies fir the spellung and tiping errurs x

[CLKD]

  ....... not the white wine then 

[MicheleMaBelle]

You might be a wise sage but have you got a video cam there? All right- busted ! I had two glasses m' lady x

[Henckenstein]

Thanks for all your words of wisdom & experience everyone, and sorry that I haven't yet figured out how to reply individually.

After my experience yesterday, and having heard what you all have to say I've decided I am going to pay to see a menopause specialist.
False economy not to; I work freelance in a creative field & my ability to work effectively has been increasingly compromised in the last couple of years.

I'm still feeling odd; wired, no attention span & with a very short fuse.
Still quite murderous but not suicidal which is a step in the right direction.

Thanks again everyone

[CLKD]

You don't need to reply individually.  Maybe open the page to reply and as follows:

CLKD: .......

Ju Ju: .........

we can then pick up your responses to your suggestions  .  Glad that you are feeling less unstable, I HATE those scary feelings  - we have another new Member feeling similar to yourself >sigh<