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[Blondie61]

I know that anxiety is a common symptom of menopause but just wondered how others dealt with feelings of impending doom? This, for me, has always been part of my psyche but seems to be spiralling out of control lately. My husband has always travelled with his job but now every time he makes a journey I'm convinced he's going to have an accident and not come home. I love my children and grandchildren so much it scares me witless something might happen to one of them. I know I wouldn't be able to cope. Night-times are the worst with night sweats waking me and then these awful thoughts taking over. Does anyone else suffer like this and will it pass??

[CLKD]

I have been afraid of my husband dying since B4 we were married  and many times have had him dead and buried, then he walks through the door >sigh<.

As I have aged I have found that my brain dwells even more.  It helps a lot that we get on most of the time so when the worst happens we will be separated without regrets.

[Meg]

Blondie

I am with you on this one.  I never used to worry to this extent.  The world is a hazardous place and the news does not help us.  I am like you because with the menopause and the, for me, never-ending sweats my worrying and anxiety has been ramped up no end.  Some women say that antidepressants help but I have not tried them.  I think that if they worked, I would be on them indefinitely.  I have not discussed this in depth with my GP who is not easy to talk to, (and 10 minutes appointment average does not give an individual much time).  Anxiety is pretty much one of the worst aspects of menopause and something which adversely affects so many women.  The effects of anxiety are also very much underestimated by some, individuals and government. I have lost much of my coping capacity and also wonder how I would cope in worst case scenarious when in the past, pre meno, I managed.  I go to pieces so much more easily.

Meg

Meg

[Blondie61]

Hi everyone, well it's good to know I'm not alone in this. I've often thought if I went to my GP I'd be offered anti- depressants (a good friend who uses the same practice has been on them since peri as she felt she'd lost her coping mechanism) but I'd prefer to avoid them if at all possible. But maybe I'm being stupid - it would be so good to feel worry-free again! Like you Meg, my doctor gives 10 minute appointments so not much time to discuss anything in depth 

[samweller161]

Well, I suffered with anxiety before menopause so I do take ADs along with HRT.  I agree with age we tend to worry more about everything.  I was ashamed for years about taking them (and in fact a lot of my friends and family still don't know I do) but actually, to hell with that, chemical imbalance is chemical imbalance and if they make me feel better then I will continue to take them.  Sorry, ranting a bit now - I guess all I am trying to say is why not try them rather than suffer?  They don't make you into some kind of zombie if thats what you are concerned about, they just help the seratonin lift enough to get the chemicals aligned so that you feel relatively yourself again.  There is still a huge stigma unfortunately.

Good luck!

SP x

[Woodlands]

Hi there.
I use mindfullness......live only in the day your in its all you can influence. I avoid taking on stress too as I see it as a wasted emotion always focusing on filling my time with smiles and happiness. My situation is different as I took the call in losing my son two years ago at 23......
Hugs
Woodlands x

[CLKD]

I don't share my medical history with anyone, even my Husband doesn't know exactly what I take - that's between my GP and myself!  After all, others don't know how often I change my underwear 

[samweller161]

Well said CKLD!  Like the knicker analogy 

SP x

[Blondie61]

Oh Woodlands, how awful for you, I'm so sorry for your loss. I've heard of mindfulness but to be honest I don't really know what it is - I'll do some research on it. I'm taking everyone's views on board so thanks to everyone who's replied - it's good to know you're all out there .... x

[CLKD]

Do you feel any easier Blondie?  Relaxation tapes, deep breathing, yoga can all be useful. 

[Blondie61]

Hi CLKD, it comes and goes. Husband home (thankfully) and family time over the weekend, so feeling ok at the moment, thanks for asking. I'd like to do yoga (did Pilates a few years ago and enjoyed that) - my problem is I never want to turn out to classes on winter evenings! I'm fine in the summer, then I want to hibernate! The thing is, as far as my husband is concerned, obviously I know one of us is going to be left on their own sooner or (hopefully) later - we've known each other nearly 40 years and as we get older the closer that time comes ... I just find it so terribly sad. I don't think I'd cope emotionally or practically, which makes me feel pathetic and weak.

[AliW]

Gosh, I am so glad I found this site.  This is me too 

[CLKD]

Maybe find a yoga class in the Summer, get into a routine so that you have 'exercises' to do once Autumn arrives?

[Taz2]

Gosh, I am so glad I found this site.  This is me too

Hi AliW

Taz x