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[flufferama]

Hello everyone. I'm new and have been reading for a few days. I think some of you very knowledgeable women can help me. Because I'm desperate.

This is a long post but I wanted to give as much info as possible so maybe someone can relate and offer advice.

A brief history of me. I turn 40 shortly. After my son was born four years ago I was plunged into terrible PND, mostly manifesting as severe anxiety and insomnia. My GP took the well-worn route of antidepressants which did not agree with me at all, sent my agitation off the scale and things got so bad I asked to be admitted to a psych hospital because I was having suicidal thoughts. I never felt like that before I took them.
In hospital I was given an antipsychotic to counter the effects of the SSRI.

Fast forward to two years later and I very slowly weaned off the meds. I was fine, really good.... until 10 days or so before my period. I would be clobbered with severe agitation, anxiety, depression. It was like clockwork, once my period arrived I'd be fine. For two to three weeks.

After four months of carefully tracking this, I came across Prof Studd's website and realised he was talking about me. Everything was relevant to my situation. My depression and anxiety were hormonal! There were no external factors for my PND, beautiful pregnancy and birth, very supportive DH and family.

I found a gynae who had heard about Studd's research and he agreed to give me Evorel 50mg patches to use just for the 10 days or so before my period arrived (I had a very regular 24 day cycle so this was easy to do).

It worked like a dream. For two years, I would feel my mood dropping, my insomnia kicking in, awful anxiety. I'd stick on a patch and bingo. All was well with the world.

That was until about a month ago. I've had an alarming slide in the past four weeks. Waking up at 5am with horrible palpitations, all the classic physical symptoms of anxiety, severe brain fog, mood slipping lower, not getting enjoyment from anything. This really worried me as it started out of nowhere with no external factors.

It hasn't lifted. I am using the Evorel at the moment and nada, it's not doing what it used to do.

I was so worried and alarmed at the VERY sudden change that I asked my GP for blood tests. I know I will most likely be 'within normal range' but things have deteriorated so badly and so quickly that I'm wondering if my thyroid is off.
GP also offered me beta blockers which I haven't taken. My blood pressure is fine.

My genetics are all screaming that this is hormone related. My gran didn't have a period after the age of 40, my mum 41 and my sister 39.

I'm due to have these bloods done next week and I have an appt to see my gynae mid September.

So here are my questions.

My biggest fear is that nothing will show up in the bloods. What can I do? I cannot continue to go on like this. I am thinking I may have to quit my job because I am not functioning, my brain is not working the way it should be, my mood is getting lower, I'm so drained of waking so early and being unable to fall back asleep. I get no joy from my darling son. My heart rate takes off at random times, when I'm watching telly, sitting on the train, lying in bed.

I know I am very intolerant to progesterone, the mini pill made me want to jump out a window and I didn't even last a full month on that.

What should I be asking my gynae to do?

Do I need progestogen (even though I don't tolerate it?) 
Do I need testosterone?
Do I need the full whack of HRT?

I'm still having regular periods, although they've stretched to 28/29 days in the past couple of months.

I feel so despondent. When I was in the psych hospital I did a lot of CBT and mindfulness. I know if I hadn't done those things I would have been having full blown panic attacks for the past month. It's only because I am very self aware that I haven't lurched into a total panic when my heart kicks off and I'm lying awake at 5am feeling really horrible. It's SO hard to stay mindful and try to otherwise relax when my body is 'fizzing' and my heart is banging.

I exercise, I eat well, I don't drink alcohol, I've stopped my two cups of coffee a day.

Where do I go from here? I cannot continue going the way I am. 

BTW I am not living in the UK and we don't have any kind of menopause clinics here. I am so scared of the sudden developments that I would be willing to fly to London and see Prof Studd, even if it costs me more money than I have.

[clare663]

Hi Flufferama. Wanted to say hello and let you know someone will be on the way with some knowledge for you soon, I'm sure! it sounds like your bloods may well show something up so I wouldnt worry too much about that. Hope you get it sorted x

[CLKD]

 

I'm sure someone will be along.  However, I believe the Prof Studd will do initial phone consults , might be worth ringing his Secretary to find out?  Also how much it would cost to visit with him and then your GP can continue prescribing?

[flufferama]

Thank you both for replying. It's interesting that Prof Studd might do a telephone consultation. It's something I will keep in mind.
I'm not due to see my own gynae until mid Sept and to be honest I don't think I can face hanging on like this until then.

I'm actually hoping my bloods show something is wrong because I can't figure out what is going on with me and why it was so sudden.

[MIS71MUM]

Hi
I just wanted to offer my sympathies....and I have been there myself.  All I can say is that don't pin too much on to the blood tests, you can still suffer from the peri, extreme pms, without anything being conclusive on your bloods.  From experience the blood tests can fluctuate anyway. 

Do you know what tests you are having done? Is it FSH or oestrogen or progesterone?

From what I've read on here if you are still having periods, then you should still be producing testosterone.

You will probably need a dose of p and o to override your cycle but someone more knowledge will be along soon.

Just noticed on another thread about citalopram, are you sure it's not the withdrawal from that?

[Milamam]

Hi from me too, welcome to this lovely place - there are so many women on this forum who have felt exactly as you do. I want to agree that you shouldn't place too much expectations on the blood tests, you may have all these horrible reactions and still have hormone levels within the normal limits.
When I started HRT two years ago, my estrogen was within limits but at the lower end, my FSH  was also within the limits but toward the higher end of the scale. One gynae said all is normal, hang in there, take herbal supplements. Two months later I went to another gynae since the herbals did nothing. When he heard about my anxiety, panick attacks, dizziness, insomnia, etc - he didn't question any further. He said I am ideal candidate for HRT and the herbal supplements won't help in my case. So its a question of the right specialist at the right time! If your current gynae is understanding, and knows your history, stick with him/her.

Also, it seems that estrogen has helped you before. Great! It may indicate that you have begun peri nowand you may benefit from continuous estrogen at a mid to high dose, not just for ten days/month. Browse here , use the search engine and see also in the menu about relevant preparations. See also others posts about Prof. Studd and his regime.

Keep posting, and good luck!
Milamam

[flufferama]

I'm sure it's not withdrawal, I came off SSRIs two and a half years ago.

I've been fine since then, barring the horrific premenstrual dips which the Evorel sorted beautifully. Until now!
This awful, awful crash started early in my cycle a month ago and hasn't lifted yet. My period is due some time next week.

GP has written to test for oestrogen, prog and thyroid. Although would my oestrogen results be off anyway given I use Evorel for 10 days a month or so?

Thanks so much for your responses. I can handle physical elements, give me heavy periods and clots and headaches, I cannot handle this terrible fog and anxiety/sadness.

[dulciana]

Hi flufferama,

You mentioned not being able to get back to sleep after waking early - have you ever tried magnesium spray?   I'm just wondering, if your sleep patterns improved, whether this would have any positive effect at all on coping with everything else that you're experiencing.  I've found I can get back to sleep 9 times out of 10, if I use mag. spray.   Just a thought.
Dulciana
x

[flufferama]

Thanks Dulciana, I'm taking two 500mg magnesium tablets a day, two omega oil tablets and Vitamin D. I have B Complex too.
I wonder if the spray would be more effective?

[donnacrichton]

Hi just want you to know you are not alone. I admitted myself also to a psychiatric hospital thinking I was going mad. Turns out it is peri with massive highs and lows. Hope you get help soon xx

[CLKD]

Another thing that I was advised when told I had PMT - which only happens leading up to a period, once the bleed stops the symptoms go; until the next month  - was to eat every 3 hours, 24/7.  In the night is important.  It helps stop that awful empty stomach lurch which can = anxiety surges.

Dried fruits/nuts; ginger biscuits; start the day with slow release food i.e. porridge    …… as well as lots of green foods and bananas.

[dangermouse]

I coincidentally just posted this on another thread that it could be oestrogen surges that can happen during peri when your ovaries make a last ditch attempt to get you pregnant by chucking out lots of oestrogen. It can cause all the adrenal symptoms you mentioned and tachycardia and any other over stimulation symptoms.

It can be very frightening due to the sudden severity and could last a few months to a year or so. You may find you're temporarily less progesterone tolerant during this time as happened to me, as could only handle very high oestrogen combined contraceptive pills when younger but found the prog made me feel better during the surges - although the mini pill was still too much.

[flufferama]

Thank you all for your replies and messages. I felt so horribly alone in this but knowing I am not crazy helps enormously.

I found a pack of ovulation predictor sticks and I'm thinking of using them next month to see if I'm actually ovulating .... Although I don't know if that makes a difference.

The surge in oestrogen is definitely something to think about, especially those symptoms you described, dangermouse.

Up to now I've practically kissed my oestrogen patches for saving me from the precipice every month. But I guess it's expected that my body will change so that couldn't last forever.

I need to be patient and wait to talk to my gynae but it's hard when I'm feeling so utterly awful. I'm curious to find out if there's any change in mood when my period arrives.

I'll keep an eye on the regular eating too. I tend to stick to three meals a day but will change that. It's so frustrating when you're doing everything "right" - eating really well, no alcohol, exercising, supplements, mindfulness, relaxation and still feel like you want to crawl out of your own skin.

Trying to be positive, I cried for a full hour on the drive home from work today. I have a banging headache now but maybe the meltdown will help somewhat!

[CLKD]

Sometimes the body needs more energy to aid us through The Change so keep eating healthy grub but split it into smaller portions through the day? 

[Mary G]

I would recommend you ring Professor Studd's office and try to arrange telephone consultation, another member did this successfully recently.  You might want to wait until after you receive your blood test results but at least you can find out if a telephone consultation is possible.

Early menopause seems to run in families and from what you have said, it would seem that your oestrogen levels have dropped and the patches are not working anymore.

Professor Studd prefers to work with Oestrogel and he will probably prescribe it for you.

Please let us know how you get on and good luck.