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[Taz2]

I have to say that I do feel the same as I did pre-menopause and roughly the same as I did when I was 30, perhaps I am unusual.  That said, before the menopause I was battling with different types of contraception that didn't agree with me so in many ways, I am better off now with HRT.

How old are you Mary G? I found that I felt fine up to around 58. My early fifties was a marvellous time - early sixties not so much!

Taz x

[Meg]

Foir myself, I do not rate the phrase 'going through the menopause' because it has simply been going on since my last period and shows no sign of letting up so I am in menopause and for all I know the hot flushes, anxiety etc etc. may go on until I kick the bucket which is a depressing thing in itself.

Meg

[Ljp]

Hope that's not the case for you meg, {{{big hug}}}

[babyjane]

I agree with CLKD but I do hope the time will not come when women are as pressured to take HRT as they are denied it at the moment.  In my opinion freedom of choice needs to be respected at all stages of our lives.

[dogdoc]

I think 'going through' the menopause is the transition obviously. Really perimenopause. I think for many many women it is the gradual cessation of hormones and the wildly fluctuating hormones at the beginning of perimenopause that are the hardest to live through. When this started for me in a big way ( 40) the first two years I literally thought I was dying and going crazy at the same time almost all day for a very large portion of the month. Every month. I was 'white knuckling' my way through my life. I'm farther along into it now although still getting periods. The wild fluctuations have stopped and so has a lot of the most horrific symptoms ( the constant weeping, panic attacks, anxiety, headaches) and now I'm into vaginal dryness and hot flash territory which in comparison is SO MUCH BETTER.

The hormonal fluctuations go on for quite some time even after our periods have stopped ...we're just not making enough hormone to cause the periods. My mom ( 74) tells me all her friends are fine for the most part other than 'normal aging' stuff. They're happy, productive, active and generally not stress bags all the time. So I think there is a version of 'getting through' that is accurate.

Having said that I will be taking HRT if I'm able to handle it as I do believe it will help prevent or slow a lot of those things that have always been considered 'normal' aging: visual changes, skin changes, arthritis, cognitive decline, osteoporosis etc. I tried it at the beginning of peri and it made me worse and better depending on the time of the month. Sometimes too much estrogen causing it's own set of horrible symptoms. I'm waiting to try again until I start regularly skipping periods so I'll know my estrogen is truly low and not just in wild fluctuation mode as it is at the beginning of 'the change'.

[CLKD]

Progesterone can be difficult for some ladies, causing extreme problems 

[coldethyl]

I am with dogdoc on this . You don't go through the menopause - you are in menopause once you have past the medically designated no bleed period of 1 yr. What most women mean by the phrase is the menopausal transition and yes , that it is a journey from hell sometimes as our own hormones dive and soar and dive again. It is this time I think most of us struggle with and the medical profession too as adding in external hormones to the mix isn't always any easier than enduring the emotional white knuckle ride of the peri itself. I have had months were I've thought I'd got it cracked only for my own hormones to crank up again and the anxiety and headaches start up again- I'm another that finds excess oestrogen makes me agitated and too much progesterone makes me down. I'll be glad when I am through this, but I think I will be one day !! My mum had tough time anxiety wise but now in meno she is fine.

[dahliagirl]

To me, it is like going into a dark tunnel with no idea what is in there and no idea what is on the other side.  I read as much as I can, but there are no answers. 

[babyjane]

For me, I can read too much as then I start to fret and get worried about things I have read that might not happen.

I went through perimenopause without even knowing such a thing exists until I discovered this site and forum years after I must have begun the process.

It was helpful to read about things I was experiencing, like VA and night sweats, and finding out about Vagifem.  It has also been helpful to share things with other ladies and read their experiences but I would not have wanted to read all about it before it happened.  As it is a lot of things I have read on here didn't happened to me so I would have been worrying for nothing and I might have felt I had to try HRT which I have not needed to use apart from the VF.

[Hurdity]

I didn't know it existed either. I just thought - oh - I've started to skip periods and I'm getting hot flushes and sweats, they will stop soon and I thought that would be it - hooray! Little did I know.....

Exactly babyjane - no use spending life's time worrying endlessly about what could be or might be. We need to do the best for ourselves that we can and try to remain optimistic and positive if we can!

Strictly speaking menopause is just that - cessation of periods so once you are through the menopause - ie your ovaries have packed up so you no longer ovulate - you are post-menopause - and that's where you stay for the rest of your life. It's a matter of semantics and definition - but important to understand as many women think you have to go "through the menopause" when you stop HRT which is not the case. Your oestrogen levels will just decline steadily, short term symptoms may or may not come back, and various long term health implications may become apparent if you are unlucky/unhealthy ( so some of it is partly lifestyle - others genetics, and our gender).

Taz great news about the BP - you must have been cutting down on the wine salt!! I thought it was an increase in oestrogen that was riding on the BP being lowered not taking it at all.  Sorry - I'm not with it at all at the moment!

Hurdity x

[Ljp]

I too thought it would be hot flushes for a while and no more periods. Didn't anticipate, the over active bladder issues, the VA soreness, brain fog, anxiety, feeling like I was losing it etc etc.
Then the fact that I had a post meno bleed after 5 months of using estriol cream, which had been improving my bladder and va, this lead to hysteroscopy, and advice of mirena and oestrogel, all have helped but feel I'm in a catch 22.
If I want to come off the HRT I feel my bladder issues and soreness will return, but it seems that just using vaginal oestrigen could well have been the cause of my post meno bleed.
So looking ahead, if I want to try without coil and oestrogel, what's the probability I will have horrible frequent urination again, and soreness during intimacy , just feels like I might have to stay on HRT, despite my health anxiety surrounding taking it long term 😟

[Hurdity]

Hi Ljp

Very very doubtful your bleed had anything to do with vaginal oestrogen (unless it was from trauma to vag tissues) I would have thought - and especially estriol which is extremely weak re stimulating endometrium, but very effective in dealing with VA and bladder symptoms.

Are you still using vaginal oestrogen? I find it strange if not, if it was effective for you. Many women are fine with just local oestrogen - but often women need HRT as well and vice versa - some women need local oestrogen as well as systemic to control VA.

Sorry can't remember how old you are. Local oestrogen does need to be taken for life - so you could try with just this again. There is also vagifem and the estring but these both contain estradiol.

Hurdity x

[Ljp]

Hi Hurdity,
Thanks for the reply, my story is, I'm now 51, at 50 I was using estriole, as the over active bladder and urgency  was ruining my life.
I had  anxiety too looking back, and brain fog hot flushes, night sweats, but wanted to try and cope with as little medical intervention as possible.

After using the estriol cream for six months, I had a light bleed, I'd been post meno for 14 months st that time, so GP referred me for a hysteroscopy.

I went expecting that and nothing more, so was surprised when durning the procedure, the gynaecologist suggested I could have a mirena coil to protect my uterus, and then use a patch or gel, plus an estring for more help locally.
She had to open my cervix as it was closed, she said I was too young for that (whatever that meant) she just said that a closed cervix is something she wouldn't expect in a 50 year old.

She left me to think about things with my husband and said I could go back at the end of her clinic and have to mirena and estring fitted, and she could prescribe patches, or I could read up and then see my GP.

It was all a bit overwhelming really, but I discussed over coffe with my husband, and he said, why not give it a try, it's not irreversible and it might make you feel better generally.
So I went back, had the coil and estring fitted, then came home and panicked feeling I was then trapped into HRT.
I then sought advice on here, and was advised to get started on systemic oestrigen too, which I did, and decide on oestrogel, which my GP happily prescribed for me.

Yes I do feel a lot better generally, I feel more in control of my emotions and a lot more level.
My bladder is a lot better, although some days urgency can be an issue, and coffe will always send me running to the loo.

My main problem is feeling completely at ease with using HRT it still worries me that it could cause breast cancer, I still feel I've failed to cope with a natural part of aging without giving in to medical assistance.
And I do wonder how I will cope when I try coming off it, or if I will have to come off it

[CLKD]

If you are hungry, do you not eat?  So your body requires support - if that support is helping ease symptoms, go with it?  Do you want to remain miserable and feeling generally un-well?  Think about how you ease day-2-day symptoms, i.e. a cold, headache - taking medication, is that 'giving in'?  Every condition/illness/disease humans suffer is natural!

I had breast cancer.  Still here!  I have HRT for vaginal atrophy and if I had suffered as some ladies have, I would have insisted on HRT.  You may require local treatment for VA, i.e. Vagifem or Ovestin1mg which plumps up tissues which means that the lips don't stick together causing problems.

Quality of Life is important to me.  I go on the story that the bus might be along and run me over, long B4 cancer was caused by HRT - which incidentally, worry was raised from very old now dis-counted Research!

The Gynaecologist sounds on the ball!  They wouldn't suggest treatment if they thought treatment won't help!