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Author Topic: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)  (Read 14174 times)

booboo

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Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« on: May 17, 2016, 07:38:01 AM »

Was watching breakfast tv and the 30 yr old, that has provoked lots of reactions and attention due to her request to be sterilised at 30 as does not want to have children..
I respect anyones decision not to have children for any or whatever reasons - however! I cant help but think being sterilised is quite extreme & at an age when circumstances, feelings, thoughts can change..I have a niece that was with her husband from the age of 17, and was adamant all throughout her twenties and up until she was 31 that she did not want children & was not particularly maternal etc.. Then she changed her mind, and  was fortunate enough to get pregnant straight away and have 3.. I also know of someone that chose to have some form of sterilisation after having had 2 children with her first husband - then when she met someone else ( who did not have children) she then went to have the procedure reversed ( at the cost of the NHS) she again was fortunate to then fall pregnant and have another child .... There is plenty of free & effective contraception available and more so than ever ..
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Cider

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #1 on: May 17, 2016, 09:02:39 AM »

I have to disagree. I appreciate that many women and probably the majority of women out there will come to a stage in their lives where they may want children, even when they think they don't.  But there are those of us out there that are just not maternal and never will be. I wish I could have been sterilised at 30! Or even at 25! I asked for sterilisation at 38 because I was having a horrendous reaction to the pill. I had already tried the injection - which made me gain 2 stone and didn't want the coil. 

I think mothers and those who wish to be mothers can never understand we women who don't wish to be mothers, just as we cannot understand the desire to bear children.

While there are many different forms of contraception, why should we as women have to take a tablet every day, or inject ourselves with synthetic hormones, or have foreign objects in our body when we don't have to? I was on the pill for 20 years, that can't be good for you. There are also other ways of having children too, should we change our minds. I don't think it's something any woman just does on a whim.
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Pennyfarthing

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #2 on: May 17, 2016, 09:18:04 AM »

Personally I think she's sensible. Her body, her choice, her decision.
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clare663

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #3 on: May 17, 2016, 10:03:19 AM »

I agree, totally selfless act on her behalf. At least she is not bringing an unwanted child into the world! I had my girl and boy in my twenties, husband had vasectomy, we divorced but I knew I wanted no more so went and got sterilised. If I had changed my mind there is always adoption or foster caring.
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CLKD

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #4 on: May 17, 2016, 10:29:16 AM »

I was sterilised at 27.  I made my mind up at the age of 8 that I didn't want to be a Mother.  Grandma told me that I was selfish but I explained that it was better to make the decision and not have lots of children that I couldn't cope with.

This woman should not have had to wait!  This is her decision and how arrogant of any Medic to make her wait  :bang: :bang: :bang:

I went to my Gynae and there was no questioning.  Other than being told that it was 'irreversible', however, he was the Consultant that did the first successful ops for women who had changed their minds  ::).  The tubes apparently can regrow anyway >shrug< but I wasn't told that.

I did expect to have to take my husband to the Consult with me and I was ready for a fight  ;D

Babies are messy, noisy, demanding ………. and it doesn't end when they leave home  ::): they bring their messy, noisy, demanding friends with them  ;D
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Dyan

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #5 on: May 17, 2016, 10:50:35 AM »

 ;DThat's true CLKD,but worth it.Coming from someone whose had 3 babies ;)
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CLKD

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #6 on: May 17, 2016, 10:54:08 AM »

You stopped at 3  :o  ::) - no twins there?

What made me so angry was that there was a query at all.  This woman should have been referred to a Gynea, counselled if necessary and then put forwards for surgery.  If one Gynae wouldn't do the op., the GP should have referred her elsewhere!
« Last Edit: May 17, 2016, 10:55:52 AM by CLKD »
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Dyan

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #7 on: May 17, 2016, 10:57:19 AM »

Nope but twins are in the family.My Dad was a twin.it might happen with my children :o ;D
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CLKD

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #8 on: May 17, 2016, 10:58:36 AM »

I didn't learn that there were twins on my Mum's side until 2 weeks before we got married  ;D
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Joyce

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #9 on: May 17, 2016, 11:16:11 AM »

I was sterilised when our son was about 6 years old. Didn't want any more children. Two was enough.

When I was about to have C Section to have son, I was asked countless times did I want to be sterilised during the op. I was 29. Of course I said no. Then when I was about to have op for sterilisation, I was asked umpteen times if I was sure this is what I wanted to do.

I was quite sure when I was sterilised, that was what I wanted.   Some women are very sure of what they want, but then I'd already had children.
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CLKD

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #10 on: May 17, 2016, 11:17:09 AM »

I was absolutely sure.  With my more recent mental health history, it confirmed what I suspected at the age of 8  :-\
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Cider

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #11 on: May 17, 2016, 12:06:05 PM »

I have also been sure all my life. Well since about the age of 13. Countless people have told me over the years that I would change my mind and I never have. I am 46 in a couple of weeks and I have no regrets about not having children. If circunstances in my life had been different there may have been a reason to change my mind, but I don't think that would have been the case, and also, I always said if I ever did have children that I would adopt rather than have my own.

Life circumstances can change so much and you can't plan for them, but I think some people just don't feel the need to reproduce and take joy in other aspects of life. I was lucky (or picky) to find a husband with the same views.
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CLKD

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #12 on: May 17, 2016, 12:42:24 PM »

Himself never wanted to reproduce either  ::)
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CLKD

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #13 on: May 17, 2016, 01:14:18 PM »

So far, StellaJane, so far  ;).   He would have made a good Dad if push came to shove but I made sure that it didn't  ;).

I have never baby-sat for people.  Rarely been involved in small children.  Parents were teachers  ::)
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Ju Ju

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Re: Sterilised at 30 ( on news)
« Reply #14 on: May 17, 2016, 04:11:28 PM »

I was sterilised at 30 after 2 children. It was a no brainer for me. 2 large babies and the need for restorative abdomen surgery. But my DH wouldn't have vasectomy, as he said if something happened to me, he might want more children with someone else.
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