GypsyRoseLee, I just wanted to say that I've read back on your previous posts over time here as I suspected what you're going through is very much the same as my experience of peri menopause, and it is! I went through almost a carbon copy of what you're experiencing right now. I didn't try HRT though, as I had serious allergies to multiple medications and my GP and Consultant Gynae. didn't want to risk it at the time.
I actually had a TAH when I was 36, and it didn't really affect me much. But just a year ago aged 46 after suffering all of what you describe for 3 years, I had to have surgery of bilateral oopherectomy which then put me into surgical menopause. My symptoms DID change after the surgery - my anxiety was much, much less but now I am faced with a new set of challenges such as depressed mood, hot flushes, severe joint pain, weight gain etc. I have HAD to start HRT as I could hardly walk! This surgery is drastic and I wouldn't advise losing your ovaries unless it is for disease.
I also tried 3 different anti depressants during peri, and for me SSRI'S made the anxiety much worse on start up so that I couldn't continue. If you are able to tolerate beta blockers and/or diazepam, your GP can supplement those to get you through the first few weeks (I was unable to take either - drug allergy and the beta blockers interfering with the action of my epi pen if needed to use it).
You've had a really rough time of it with experimenting with the HRT, haven't you? My personal theory is that for some of us who swing wildly hormonally in peri, HRT can aggravate the times when our estrogen levels spike, causing the anxiety to go completely bonkers. I think if you can coast on anti depressants until you enter menopause proper, you may settle down enough to try HRT again then if you would like to.
It can be trial and error with the SSRI's too. Don't be afraid to tell your GP if one is not suiting you and if you'd like to try another.