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[Spangles]

Hi ladies,

I had my peri diagnosed around 4-5yrs ago, can't remember to be honest! ( meno symptom )!
Some times I thing I'm doing great then something sets me off again and I'm a wreck. My anxiety is quite high at the moment and like many of you I feel like I'm getting ill again with my depression and anxiety and relate it all to starting another breakdown, very scary!
My rational head tells me it's my hormones and it will pass, but my irrational head puts me back.
What I'm asking is how long you have been 'going through it' and can you relate to how I'm feeling?

Look forward to your replies.

Shellb
xXx

[Lizab]

Hi! I can definitely relate! I've been going through peri with physical symptoms for a few years, but the up and down, anxiety and depression started only 6 months ago. Well, actually the anxiety had been building for some time before that, but I fully broke down about 6 months ago. I've since started HRT and am keeping my head above water now, but the ups and downs are still with me in the background. I'm considering asking for an adjustment to my HRT, as I've learned from this past few months that plodding through with a positive attitude works well for awhile but if it all catches up to me things get really bad. I keep telling myself it's only hormones and it will pass, and that does help, but I get so exhausted with it intruding in my life.

How close to the end of it do you think you are? Are you medicating/supplementing/going at it completely free?

[Spangles]

Hi Lizab,
I use citalopram 40mg per day, evorel 50 and utrogestan 200!
Haven't got a clue how far along I am mad I don't want to stop the HRT to find out at the moment.
I do think that when my own hormone kick in it affects the anxiety, definitely.
xXx

[coldethyl]

Started in 2013 I'd say and managed ok till January of last year when the anxiety started up along with various odd symptoms like hives and tingling. Escalated last September and it's been a rollercoaster ride since then  - anxiety up  and down and some days it's a struggle to see past that day if I'm honest. Currently it's the adrenaline surges and skippy heart beats that are scaring life out of me- my GP just tells me that all these things are par for course for the menopausal transition and not to worry so much but that is easy when it's not you. I think our rational heads just get swamped by all the adrenaline swishing round with the decline of our hormones. I'm  not on HRT but think the day is looming when I'll have to decide a better now is worth more than a possible crap outcome in the future. X

[Ms Saucy]

Hi there.
Started for me at 48 ish.....toughest time around then until I was 50..….now tomorrow I will be 53 and the Meno is just part of my journey in life xx

[skkb]

Started at 52 now 65 and things still happen. HRT kept me sane and gave me quality of life eliminating most of the awful symptoms that's why I've chosen to go back on it after a year off, the doctor agreed. Only sufferers know how debilitating the anxiety/adrenaline rush and the like affect all areas of life plus all the awful meno symptoms......if doc is happy then I will continue with it indefinitely.......I guess something will eventually come and "bite me on the bum" as they say but until then I want to feel well at this stage of my life

[Sooby]

I started with the fluttery heart beat and the occasional of the chart anxiety attack about 6 years ago and things have gradually built up since then. I found that understanding what it is makes it happen made it so much easier for me to deal with as I am able to use NLP techniques to control it and relate to it more positively.

Fessing up to it and letting others know about it really helps too as I no longer have to hide it. Also knowing that it isnt me, its just my hormones means that I can detach myself from it. I use different strategies to deal with different aspects of it and of course the HRT helps immensely as the adrenalin surges are exhausting over a protracted period of time.

I have had to alter my life to reduce external stressors and triggers and make time for more focussed relaxation but after almost 50 years of striving, I think that's a good thing. 

Oh, helping others to deal with it really helps me too. 

[walking the dog]

peri started age 44im now 50.  first symptoms were crying low mood inability to cope it hit me like a ton of bricks then very quickly hot flushes and awful night sweats kicked in.in past six years I have been on  different anti depressants plus propranalol and valium none of which have helped and   5 different hrt types the one im onnow which I started in February has got rid of the flushes and night sweats thankfully but mood can still go at tge drop of a hat . my mam had one hideous final period aged 54 no symptoms at all and that wss it for her.now I dont have tge heat oozing from me 24 hours a day I feel a lot better and other things are more copable.have no idea how far off menopause I am but it cant be worse than the peri its ruined my life and I lost most of my forties and my job because of the anxiety abd depression I have suffered with it .

[babyjane]

Don't know when I started really as I had a hysterectomy at 38 but my first hot flush/night sweat occurred at 52 and I am now 59.  I think my hormone levels started fluctuating before this but as I was not having bleeds I had no way of knowing.  Looking back now I guess it all started around 44, so 6 years after my hysterectomy.

[TropicalVon69]

Hi Shelby, I'm going through a really rough patch too....had a horrendous suicidal night last night and period started this morning....just trying to ride the shockwaves today.....started with uncontrollable panic 2 years ago but some symptoms before.....have upped my ad as of last week so hopefully next month will be better....hugs to you xxx

[Night_Owl]

Some times I thing I'm doing great then something sets me off again and I'm a wreck. My anxiety is quite high at the moment and like many of you I feel like I'm getting ill again with my depression and anxiety and relate it all to starting another breakdown, very scary

Hi Shellb

Yes I can definitely relate to how you're feeling.  I've been going through this meno cr@p for c.9 years - and in many ways I'm a shadow of my former self.

I've found it difficult to work out what is depression and anxiety - and what is meno induced - or are the two intrinsically linked.  Often mentally feel not that far away from the edge of the precipice.

"Some times I thing I'm doing great then something sets me off again and I'm a wreck."  Yes, yes - quickly I can be reduced to a blubbering wreck - also think that I've turned a corner and improving, then I'll be right back to square one and crushed.

The longer meno has gone on, the more depleted mental and physical reserves have become, coping abilities zero.  Always waking up tired doesn't help.

Sorry this is gloomy, just telling it how it is, no sugar coating - hope somehow in some small way it makes you feel that you're not alone in all this, others are on the same journey.

Let's hope for better days ...

x

[ellie555]

Hi Shelb and Nightowl

Oh how I can relate to your posts.  At the moment I am at the end of my tether.  I have been what I can only describe as "suffering" for seven years.  I am on a roller coaster of feeling goodish one hour of the day to plummeting to suicidal thoughts a couple of hours later.  I can now cry for England and have tried so very hard to help myself.  You name it, I've tried it - Diet, exercise, meditation, working at key relationships, new things to learn ( for the brain), time out, saying no, drugs, no drugs, alcohol, no alcohol, eating healthily, eating what the hell I like, conselling, CBT.  Now I don't know where to turn and feel like I am in a living hell, either feeling s..t or waiting to feel s..t.
Sorry, but as you might have guessed - feeling s..t at the moment.  Tomorrow I may feel ok but then again I might not!!!!

[Meg]

No end in sight. Started with serious hot flushes and sweats when periods finished at fifty.  That was where my old healthy self ended!  Still flushing at sixty-one.  Can empathise totally with all.  Ramped up anxiety, depression, crying, morning nausea, loss of concentration is awful.  Before this happened to me I really had no idea about menopause, used to think other ladies having flushes was a bit of a joke!  How wrong I was.

Meg

[walking the dog]

All of us women suffering to such an extent and for such long periods of time not weeks or months buy years its shocking .I find it hard to reconcile my mind to the fact that there is not better help available.  if we said to men that they would loose a large portion of their lives forty onwards and totally feel like shit then im sure there would be a riot .

even though peri has ruined my life I know im better off thanwomen centries ago who didnt have hrt therapy etc but id like to think research is still happening so future generations of women dobt suffer at all .I wonder if it is ?

[Night_Owl]

As discussed on here before, in times gone by some women were sent to the asylum - I would have been a candidate for that!  Witches banished to caves, up all night making potions - menopausal women?

What is so frustrating is that meno feels like being ill *forever*. 

Always *waiting* to feel better, tomorrow I'll feel better - and then you find that years pass - no levelling out - just feeling worse and worse and looking more haggard and wretched (with a miserable gob and stringy hair in my case).

Ellie555 - yes I know what you mean, so frustrating - you try so hard *to help yourself* and it makes sod all difference. I eat comfort chocolate etc whenever I feel like it, it doesn't make on jot of difference when I abstain for months on end. 

Feeling like sh/t or waiting to feel like sh/t.  OH YES.

Sometimes I do wonder if I'm tipping over into serious mental health issues - eg. when I'm feeling particularly ropey, I find it hard to motivate myself to do anything - then when I feel *marginally* better, I'll rush around like a mad thing trying to catch up but feeling very anxious with a racing mind.  An overriding feeling of *not being in control*.

Meanwhile, friends and acquaintances seem to be sailing through without a sniff of this shedload of crap to deal with, lives carrying on as normal.  You know how that can be - some women can be competitive - sure they either pity me or think I'm drama queen-ing.

It is despairing and hard to take on board that it could be like this for the rest of one's life. 

Sorry for the rant!  Menopausal treatment is still very much in its infancy.