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[Joyce]

Meno happened for me in my mid 30's, now nearly 60. I gave up work to look after my eldest GD who is now 7. At the same time I took my first break from HRT. Big mistake!!! Looking after GD was exhausting enough, combined with flushes, sweats, lack of sleep etc. I must have been mad! Got through it though as daughter needed my help.

Not sure flexible hours would work, certainly wouldn't have worked for me if I'd still been working. I felt rubbish 24/7. Even a short walk to supermarket had me totally exhausted. Not something I'd like to do again.

[limpy]

Menopause is not an illness - it just isn't.
Re Flexible working helping.
It didn't help me to keep working when my MS really decided to kick in.
Thankfully I'd medically retired by the time meno hit.

[lancashirelass]

You can be sacked for sickness.  Im not sure avoiding work all together is healthy i agree there needs to be more understanding by employers but every woman in meno taking 6 months off meaning employers have to pay more to recruit and train someone else is not the answer.  I had severe endo and at times was crippled until i had my hyst and had to drag myself into work.  It wasnt easy but I was determined not to let any condition get the better of me. 

[Candy Floss]

I know the meno isn't an illness, but it's a case of, I'm not ill but I really do feel ill.  I realise that six months paid leave is unworkable - but - how about a law that safeguards women's jobs if they need time out due to the menopause?  There must be so many women who take time off and end up getting the sack - because technically they're not suffering from an illness.

[mandypepe]

Interesting thread. I've been lucky all my life with period pain and have friends who have to stay in bed. I've just posted about extreme pain that woke me this morning and I can honestly say if today had have been Monday I could not have driven and gone into work I was in that much pain with stomach cramps. I would have had to ring in sick. Luckily my department is majority women and quite a few are menopause and peri so it's openly discussed regarding support with feelings etc. But yes, this mornings pain would have prevented me from doing anything.

[CLKD]

Sacked for sickness?  how so. 

[CLKD]

Teresa - any triggers (we have several threads about IBS here ;-) )

[Ju Ju]

I wish IBS was recognised too in this country as it is in the states. Its very difficult to work with that too as often I'm in and out of the loo eight or ten times a day

The combination of IBS, menopause and extreme exhaustion led me to claim my teaching pension early and retire completely after several years of just doing supply. I went through a period of time when I had sudden emergencies several times a day and that does not go well within a classroom.

' Sorry, children, play amongst yourselves while teacher runs to the toilet!' doesn't quite cut it!

Very stressful, even when my digestive system was calm. It was the fear of having an accident. I didn't get any support from my then GP, other than to check there was nothing sinister going on. It seemed that if they can't see anything, it didn't exist. I have experienced more support in the last few years, if not any answers.

I do wonder how I would have coped financially without my DH. Because I have been unable to work full time for many years, my teaching pension is small, though welcome, and of course, my state pension age has been pushed back twice, now at 66.

[CLKD]

Add to that Teresa that I can't add-up ……. so no tills for me either 

[walking the dog]

I had to leave my job at the end of November due to severe perimenopausal symptoms. I was constantly crying in tge toy cupboard at the nursery I worked in and the staff were not sympathetic. The manager was disgusting and hauled me into the office on many an occasion  telling me I didnt have an illness and if I couldnt cope I shouldnt be there. I eventually had several periods on the sick with depression and anxiety and on return to wirk I was met with the same attitude . my working life became unberable and my confidence was shot I began to question my own ability to do a job I had done for many years basically because I was not getting any support from management. eventually the manager went on maternity leave and the acting manager who came was fantastic she was totally supportive of both my depression and my anxiety and I began to feel better about myself. however the closer the time got to the original manager coming back off maternity leave I began to suffer depression and anxiety off tge scale . it was at this point that I realised I couldnt continue to work there as things would revert once manager was back. I basically felt I had no choice but to resign which I couldnt afford to do but my health had to come first. im still looking for a new job but getting out of that obe was a positive move health wise.
im nit sure about paid leave for menopause but there should be awareness amongst managers of how some wonen like myself can be deeply affected .

[CLKD]

   bet you miss your work ……….

How have you been since you left (you've probably said on here    ) …...

[walking the dog]

I do miss it I miss the children and I miss the gew nice staff who worked there.
 Im a lot better now im not there as I dont have the pressure of wondering how I can get through a day however its brought its own issues such as money worries etc but hopefully I will find a job soon .

my depression seems ok at the minute but my anxiety is  very bad I couldnt leave the house twice last week with it then I worry more as I think how xan I find a job in this state and I never know when the depression will strike I literally live day to day as I never inow how I will be .

I tried to claim ESA but was refused it as having worked part time I haven't paid enough NI contributions I must be daft but I assumed I had been paying them .I bet there are lots of people in this situation. si now I must fibd a job but will I be able to do it as im still perimenopausal and my moods all over

[CLKD]

One has to pay into the system if your employer doesn't? I can't quite remember  but know that I couldn't afford to do so when I was self employed so opted out.  Thank goodness for DH's Pension!

Could you go into school as a support teacher to hear children reading etc.? or tutor older children before exams.?

[mandypepe]

That's awful how your manager was. I know I'm really lucky as although I  have real dread and anxiety now about going to work and not believing in myself etc etc and every week tell my manager I'm leaving because I can't do it anymore, it's a supportive team.

[lancashirelass]

From gov.uk website
You can be dismissed if you have a persistent or long-term illness that makes it impossible for you to do your job.

Before taking any action, your employer should:

look for ways to support you - eg considering whether the job itself is making you sick and needs changing
give you reasonable time to recover from your illness