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[warwick01]

Thanks again for your support - it really helps to know I'm not alone.

Greenfields - you describe exactly how I'm feeling, yes I know its my hormones but I feel like a broken women
I also suffered like this post natal, like child birth it fades with time. Also not sure if it's an age thing but don't feel as strong as then.

I spoke with my DH last night still in floods of tears, he is supportive and he will come to GP tomorrow. However I still feel he doesn't understand how deep I am in this dark hole, of which I can't get a grip to get out...........

I truly wish I had friends close by who understand this misery (set me off crying again) xxxxx

[Annie0710]

Nobody I know well in my life is going through menopause and have the symptoms I have, I have no mum, my sister left our family years ago (she's 10 years older so definitely post meno) so for me this forum is a lifeline


Annie xx

[warwick01]

Hi Annie - same with me. I do remember my mum passing a comment when she was menopausal ( don't think she linked it to meno) that her nerves were really bad and she found her self running out of shops.......... mmm makes me think! Growing up I can remember my Nan always having a drink of alcohol during the day, again makes me think!

I have tried to talk to women such as neighbours and a couple of friends my age about menopause and how bad it can feel. Not one has ever said they suffer and never seem to want to talk about it. I wonder if sites like this are good because its anonymous?? I was only thinking this morning more information should be on TV about the extent of suffering during the menopause (not just flushes etc) but as my last job was in productions in TV......... would I sit in front of a camera and tell the world how bad my symptoms are??

Wxx 

[SadLynda]

Hi Warwick
You are sounding a little better today.  It does help to chat to those who understand.  I do have my Mum, who went through hell and my daughter who has pre-natal depression just now and also getting battered by hormones.. BUT I cant tell either of them how bad things are, they would both worry.. how do you tell those so close you can spend hours in floods of tears for the most stupid of things? and how sometimes leaving the house is an achievement?

You are right, this should be made more public and there should be more help available, and more GP's who actually have a clue (but that is another story )  I know I couldnt talk in public, as we have said before when ignored it makes us angry, but given any sympathy and it makes us cry.

[Annie0710]

I'd talk to anyone who could be bothered to listen !
I started chatting with a neighbour about it (she's 7 years older and menopausal) I thought omg I've got a meno buddy but she clamped up and stopped mentioning it, sad because we were switching notes

A woman I sit next to at work is 9 years older so I asked her how she managed "sailed through it" was her response , my friend who's post meno and had a terrible time with thyroid mess for years and had hysterectomy many moons ago can't help as the thyroid ruled her life

I don't get flushes so I haven't even got that in common with anyone

My mum suffered hot flushes and I swear she must've had depression as it was that time she started drinking heavily and hiding it, and her moods after alcohol were unpredictable, but she never ever went to the docs so never got treatment, poor lady

Annie xx

[toffeecushion]

How did it go at the doctors?

[GypsyRoseLee]

It's just not talked about openly is it. Particularly the depression and anxiety issues. On another meno website a well respected poster rather coldly informed me that I must just be mentally ill because she's never experienced depression/anxiety during meno and neither had any of her friends. Which was nice. The fact my anxiety/depression can disappear completely for up to 2 weeks at a time wasn't taken into consideration at all. Apparently I needed to be under a psychiatrist not a gynaecologist.

I tried mentioning my peri meno symptoms to a few friends who I suspected were also suffering (complaining of insomnia, headaches, feeling too 'stressed') but the second I mentioned the 'M' word they clammed up and changed the subject.

[toffeecushion]

I wish it was talked about more, you can feel so alone at times and like you are the only one suffering. 

[warwick01]

Hi - just want to update all my friends regarding visit to GP with DH.

We arrived and was told she was 30 minutes behind. I sat there completely wired (which is my problem) my shoulders up to my ears, Im so tense it'e untrue. Anyway she was lovely. I was in tears just with relief she was supporting me. She asked my DH if he was aware of how bad I was feeling he replied he had noticed I was avoiding going out, and that I had such a short fuse these days, then I would be in tears. She told him she treats lots of women like this and it is a difficult time for couples. She told him it will pass but I need help and support now.

Basically she as suggested I try 10mg Citrapem (not sure about spelling) I told her I had bad experience with Sssr AD 16 years ago so she suggested I cut them in half to start. Also she as referred me for CBT but wants me to go out as much as possible with my DH. Still waiting for my blood results which I should get Tuesday.

My DH took me for a drink after and I could not stand being sat in public. I find busy, public places are too difficult to bear. My husband keeps asking if Im OK.... which must be 50 times upto now.

Oh I told my GP about how much of a support you ladies and this site has been.

Enjoy ur weekend W xx

 

[dazned]

Hi Warwick 01. Well at least you have made a start well done ! Try and persevere with the citlopram it should help give you a bit of stability and some ladies find it helps with hot flushes too. Also remember that ADs of sixteen years ago are not all the same nowadays,likewise your body is different too. I always said I can't get on with them but here Iam taking them alongside my hrt and really glad that I did. Hope you start to feel better soon.

[GypsyRoseLee]

I agree toffeecushion. So many times I have feltike the loneliest person on Earth when I wake like a meerkat at 3am and get the dreaded anxiety.

It really helps that you ladies both understand and sympathise.

[CLKD]

Don't ask me how I am 'cos I have to make a decision and that increases the likely hood of a panic attack  - however, we have a buzz word when out with family/friends which means I have to leave NOW!

Also - are there places that you can go with DH that is quiet? i.e. walks in the countryside …… away from noise and people.  I find when anxious that noise makes me feel worse. Cooking smells from pubs etc. can upset me as when anxious my senses are heightened!  Taking a picnic somewhere quiet? 

Little steps.  Sit down with DH and have a plan.  He will then feel included even if he can't empathise 

[Annie0710]

Bless ya Warwick and your hubby too

You'll get there, as we all will

Annie xx

[Hurdity]

Hi warwick

Just to say I'm sorry to hear about how you'ree feeling at the moment as I know you've had a struggle recently with the different types of HRT and doses etc.  I agree it is puzzling why you are still being affected as you will be most likley post-meno - but I think you are probably reacting to the decrease in dose and all the changes that you've had recently ( in HRT). So glad you've talked to your husband at last so you can share your feelings and get his support - and I do hope you will feel better little by little.

Hurdity x

[jgr]

So many women have what you are going through Warwick, myself included. I think you have a great GP and she seems so understanding, this is what you need. Why oh why is menopause kept so quiet, all i thought it consisted of were hot flushes, how wrong could i have been. Flushes on their own would have been easy but it is all the other horrid things we experience that takes it's toll.