Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Micky]

I don't visit the forum very often - went thru a divorce in oct last year and a full hysterectomy at end of Dec & have now lived alone for 3 years ( the first time in my fifty odd years) ... I have battled with an extreme health anxiety on and off for 20 odd years stemming back from something that happened in my twenties ...Its a very real fear - I thought that I was doing really well and had managed to conquer it once and for all... But no - I just happened to pick up a newspaper purely by chance and saw an article that raised back my fear ...I tried to fight it and not let it get a hold of me, but all the negative thoughts and convincing myself of it have reared their ugly head... On meds and virtually housebound because the fear is just going around and around... Its no way to live/exist and I cant see my way out -how does anyone else cope with all this stuff - or is It just me ?

[honeybun]

No it's not just you.

Are you getting any help from your GP. Health anxiety is a real fear, not imagined , but very real.

We can try to help if you want....just as a place to get it all out. No one judges, we just want to help if we can.
If you think it would help get it out here in an anonymous place.

If not we will hold your hand anyway.


Honeyb
X

[bramble]

No it is not just you. I think as we get older it can affect us more and more. Have you talked to your GP about it? Some form of CBT can help and the sooner you can get your name down for it the better. I am not sure what/if nedication can help but certainly chat to your GP. Perhaps have a look at the 'no more panic' website - it has a section for health anxiety.

Bramble

[Bettyboo]

Hi Micky

You are not alone. I have only recently joined this forum and find it a tremendous help. I have had HA and anxiety, for about three years now. I have only recently made the connection with menopause (the Drs have not). I often feel unable to actually do anything, almost paralysed with a kind of fear whilst the 'inner chatter' goes on and on about what if it's this? what if it's that? I only have to see someone on one of my FB groups mention the Big C word and my mind is off again.

I am in France so accessing any 'talking therapy' is difficult. I have found the No More Panic website quite helpful, but also a book called 'Get out of your mind and into your life' by Steven Hayes very helpful. It has a lot of strategies for dealing with anxiety. In fact, I still haven't finished reading it thoroughly and working through the exercises! The book was recommended by someone on a fibromyalgia website (this was the Drs diagnosis - but I don't have it, I'm pretty sure).

I find that just checking in here every day and reading that everyone else has very similar meno symptoms is helping me.

Hugs
BB x

[Rebelyell]

I totally sympathies - I have had six months of terrible HA and full blown panic attacks.  I then developed stomach aches and bladder problems which made me convinced I had either bowel or ovarian cancer.    Before that it was fear of losing my teeth, before that it was heart attack/stroke.     I felt I was trapped in my mind and falling down a big pit of fear and despair.  Couldn't bear to read/watch anything about health issues and was constantly googling random symptoms.

The thing that helped me the most was keeping busy and being with people.  Not easy in your situation I appreciate, but don't be proud, seek out anybody/any place where you feel you might be able to relax a bit and forget yourself.   You also need to be kind to yourself - I hadn't realised how tough my last two years had been on my mental wellbeing and once I gave myself a break, I felt a bit calmer. 

Mindfulness and meditation helps - look up your nearest Buddhist centre, they will run courses and at the very least you will meet caring people and others who are going through the same as you [it is very common]. 

I don't know what made me feel better recently but it happened all of a sudden and I am trying hard to stick with the moment.  Good luck, it isn't easy but tell yourself 'this can't last forever, I will get better'.    You conquered it before, and you can do again. 

[countrybumpkin]

I have had quite severe health anxiety since I was a child having to witness illness and death at a very young age that scarred me for life! 
The No more panic website can be useful in that you realise that everyone with ha thinks the same way and its not just you.
I have found that my ha has improved a bit with age and experience but did get worse in peri meno ( I am now 3 yeras post meno).
I have tried every therapy there is over the years and though they have helped especially the why I am like I am none are a cure.
I find having a plan helps me alot so I will tell myself if I have these symptoms in a week I will see the Dr rather than rushing there straight away etc etc .
Having someone to talk over your fears with  I find a great help so if you need me just send me a private message as I will gladly listen and try to help.x

[Micky]

Thank you kind ladies for your replies..

My GP knows of my fears/concerns & I have had cognitive therapy & am on anti- deps ....I have actually had periods in the past whereby this particular health fear ( re something I did when younger) seemed to dissipate & I was able to lead a reasonably normal life and not wake up with extreme anxiety and dread.... I would give anything not to have this fear & I would give anything to turn the clock back and not feel that I have done something to myself.. No amount of physical reassurance - seems to stop the negative fear/thoughts that it may happen sometime and it just goes over and over in my head - I know its called " ruminating" - its so exhausting and a waste, but don't seem to be able to just snap out of it.... I imagine the illness and how would I cope - when I can hardly cope/function with just the thought.... I sometimes feel that I am literally going to go mad and no one can help ...Its also very isolating - as I try to conceal it ( keep myself to myself) .. My parents know - but they don't understand it & are frustrated and don't get how I can be fearful of something that has not yet happened and may not... Its like being in hell...

[CLKD]

Guilt?

[Micky]

CKLD - I understand something about psychology, but I don't think " Guilt" is why I suffer with fears and rumination...... My particular fear is of something health wise  developing ( that I did naively and unintentionally when young) its a very real fear ( for me) .. I don't think I have ever done anything wicked or intentionally harmful to anyone else - so I don't have guilt in that respect.. I think maybe i inherited a lot of negative thinking, and as a consequence excessive anxiety to the point that it disrupts my life..

[CLKD]

That's 1 to cross off the list as guilt can be draining and debilitating 

Something happened when you were younger but so far of no consequence: but you still worry that it might?  )guessing here  (

What does your GP suggest in the scheme of things as to the possibility of your worry occurring?  Does the rumination happen any time of day/night or as you are dropping off to sleep?  That's when anything I've said/done 'wrong' throughout my Life jumps at me 

[Micky]

CKLD -  I imagine all of us ( being human) can have/experience guilt at times, as none of us are perfect ..But I don't feel/think I have done anything to beat myself up over in that sense ..

You are right re " worry that it might"..

My Gp suggests - meds and cognitive behavioural therapy ( managing the fear) but doesn't take it away... I can ruminate all day, when my mind goes into that bad place - its exhausting and only respite is sleep..

[CLKD]

My phobia is like that.  Even knowing that 'nothing bad has happened' - psychologist speak! - when the physicality hits me I feel like this time, bad might happen.  Then panic attacks hit.  Without the emergency med I wouldn't cope.

Have you tried taking half a day at a time?  I also found that making lists each evening and ticking off stuff each day gave me a positive in that it showed what I had achieved!

[Micky]

CKLD... That's pretty much how it is for me - although I may have been checked ( by a doc) and assured nothing physically wrong, the fear that it might is still at the forefront of my mind ...and its not if but when ...I don't seem to be able to just move on from it and the thoughts & fears go around and around...Its dreadful because when I get so bad I cant enjoy life and its a waste - I wonder if the fear of something happening is worse than the reality & if our minds magnify things when we are in a state of anx..

No  I have not done the half day at a time thing - I need to try something before i get carted off to the funny farm

[honeybun]

Sometimes when things happen we find the strength from somewhere to face the worse and carry on.

Have you tried hypnotherapy. If you are a suitable candidate then it can be very helpful with relaxation.


Honeyb
X

[Micky]

Honeybun

I know you are right ..I sometimes think the media/ aderts/newspapers/mags/net etc  have contributed to increased anx and worry - ignorance is sometimes bliss..

I have tried hyno some years ago - but as with all these things they cost ..If I was wealthy I would check myself into the Priory - although some would say that wouldn't work, and they just fleece people  of hundreds of pounds.