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[dogdoc]

hi all. Had to vent.

I have been on this hellish ride for two years ( probably longer) and what I've come to learn is that the state of women's health care, at least in middle age, is tragic.

Since I started this journey I've seen two gps, a neurologist, an ent ( headaches), an internal medicine specialist, a psychiatrist and an obgyn. NOT ONE of these specialists or regular docs except the obgyn thought about or brought up hormones. I only saw the obgyn after the two years and after I screamed loud and long enough that I thought it was all hormonal that my doc threw up her hands in defeat. Guess what. It's hormonal!!

If one more doctor told me 'it was stress' I was going to start throwing punches. So why is it in this day and age when millions of women around the world are going through this time, spending millions upon millions of taxpayer dollars ( mri anyone?) that doctors are not more familiar with the symptoms of perimenopause?

Since I had to figure out what was going on with me by myself, I have met, spoke to and discussed this with a ton of middle aged women, and we all have the same sad story. If you are under say 45 the docs refuse to believe it might be menopause. I'm so angry and frustrated?

Sorry for the vent.
Tara

[Meg]

So agree with your posting.  Women are crying out for more understanding undergoing this major chemical change with their bodies and minds.  Things are getting worse if anything.  The thing is that many women have lost faith in their doctors and disheartiningly it seems that many women are being told it's all in their head and maybe offered no help.  Yes things are definitely going on in your head but that's because the ovaries are failing.  I dont know if there is a definitive solution to all of this but a sympathetic and knowledgeable approach from the medical profession would help women enormously.  I hope that in the future for women's sakes solutions will be found because menopause is for many years of your life and women need and deserve help.

Meg   

[Rhubarb]

I'm with you too. I'm 48, and about 4 years into perimenopause.  It took me 3 of those years before I figured out, on my own, that it was hormones causing all the crazy symptoms and feelings I was having.  It was a relief when it all became clear to me, but it is maddening that doctors don't even mention hormones as a possibility. And that we're not taught about it in advance, like girls are prepared before puberty hits.  The only thing I can think of is that doctors don't want us to become too quick to blame hormones, in case the palpatations or dizzy spells or whatever could really be a symptom of something serious and we don't go get it checked out because we think it's only hormones.

[Petra]

Yes!! I agree. So we might live a third to half of our lives dealing with menopause (peri, meno, post) and yet it's invisible. Then again, it seems everything about women's health is too scary, icky or whatever for society to deal with, so we just pretend it doesn't happen: periods, contraception, abortion, menopause, sex etc. I think this invisibility plays a big role in the medical profession's reluctance to really engage with what's going on with us. And I think we, women, need to speak out a lot more about all of it. Younger women are pretty vocal these days, and we middle-aged and older women could take to a leaf out of their book and speak out about what cr*p we face more. And let's stop apologising for being older. I keep hearing women do this. Say what? (Excuse derailing last comment.)

[Dorothy]

It's not just bad for older women - I missed out on half my teens due to severe anaemia.  If you heard of a teenage girl who had extremely heavy periods, was pale, constantly tired, fainted frequently, had dizzy spells, was exhausted by simple things like climbing stairs...what would be your first thought?  I guess most of us would think 'anaemia'.  Well, my GP didn't. 

After years of being tested for ever more random things (like diseases only 2 people in the whole of the UK have), someone finally picked up that I had never, ever been tested for anaemia.  After that, it took me until age 30 before my severe pain & bleeding was taken seriously and not just treated as 'part of life - live with it'.  At 33 I started a period that lasted for a year before anyone would take it seriously, and now at 39 I have all the symptoms of being peri-meno but again...no one is interested.  There seems to be a deeply ingrained belief that 'women's problems' are just things we have to deal with - unless you are pregnant or trying to become pregnant, no one is interested in any other aspect of women's health.

[Kathleen]

Hello ladies.

I agree with so much of what's been said and we do need to be more assertive although that is difficult when feeling so horrible.

I also think that this forum offers a valuable service as it allows women to feel supported and helps them become knowledgeable and empowered. I my opinion it's a great example of women doing what women do best and long may it continue. 

Best wishes everyone.

K.

[peegeetip]

'part of life - live with it'

well put Dorothy and Kathleen.

That is the main problem with peri and meno.

So many think that it's 'part of life - live with it' sadly.

If we loose function in our pancreas, we develop diabetes and we get treated for it.

If we loose function in our ovaries, we are on the main ignored and told to "live with it".

The sooner we stop treating it as "just natural" and something to "embrace" then it might get treated as the serious condition it is.

[Dancinggirl]

As I have commented before, the menopause wasn't an issue for many in "the good old days' as we were lucky to get to 50 in the first place. If you were well off, a women had "the vapours' and lounged on the couch or became a permanent invalid. Many women suffered with their "nerves" and it was not unusual for some women to be committed to an asylum!!!
It is now well known that the lack of oestrogen has very negative effects on the body and as we are expected to work longer, take care of ageing relations who are also living longer, then it makes practical sense to support women through this very challenging time of their lives.
Finding ways to screen or monitor our hormones or the changes that happen would be highly beneficial - proper Well Women Clinics should be in every large town or city as centres of expertise to help prevent and treat the long term problems caused by the menopause AND ALL HORMONE RELATED ISSUES.
DG x 

[dogdoc]

I've lost more than a year of my life. I do believe that most docs are trained to view middle aged women as whiners and complainers. They arrive with lists of symptoms ( sound familiar??) and cry in their offices. Repeatedly.

They look at our blood work which may be perfectly normal. They ultrasound us and X-ray us and shrug their shoulders. What I think most of these women want is validation. Validation from a doctor that no we are not losing out minds. We are not dying.  We are not making it up. It's real. Its chemical. Its physical. Psychological.

I went from a fit , six pack sporting, sprinting surfing woman at 39, to a crying panicking exhausted mess at 41. My doctor told me excercise more. I cannot get out of my chair!!! Fatigue hits like a wall. I got lost in the woods while hiking with my dog because of brain fog. I cried on the beach surfing with my friend because I could not paddle. My body felt like concrete.
I watched my normal low blood pressure go from 100/65 to 150/ 80. I wanted to stand and scream WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING TO ME!!!!  And still no one medical is listening.

I want to go to med school so I can start up a clinic for middle aged women.  I can't afford to do this, but boy am I mad!!

[Dancinggirl]

dogdoc - I think many of us share you frustration and anger - 
DG xxx

[peegeetip]

Good points DG and DogDoc.

Sorry to hear how bad things have gone DogDoc.
I feel I've lost/spoiled more than 1 year btw and wish I'd known more about peri years before they hit.

Have you managed to get anything (HRT) from the docs?

It's a very real condition that we ignore at our peril.

 

[dogdoc]

I am going against medical advice, but my GP was at least willing to let me try ( she knows how much research I have done). I started on 25 last month, and this month moved up slightly to 37.5. I might sit on this dose for a couple months, then recheck estrogen again before adjusting up or down. This is the lead up to the expected time when I MIGHT ( or might not) get a period...so usually a pretty bad week for me. So far only minor anxiety, no sleep ( no shock there), little nausea. But nothing that has me sobbing in a chair ( yet)...still expecting it.
t

[honorsmum]

I've lost more than a year of my life. I do believe that most docs are trained to view middle aged women as whiners and complainers. They arrive with lists of symptoms ( sound familiar??) and cry in their offices. Repeatedly.

They look at our blood work which may be perfectly normal. They ultrasound us and X-ray us and shrug their shoulders. What I think most of these women want is validation. Validation from a doctor that no we are not losing out minds. We are not dying.  We are not making it up. It's real. Its chemical. Its physical. Psychological.

I went from a fit , six pack sporting, sprinting surfing woman at 39, to a crying panicking exhausted mess at 41. My doctor told me excercise more. I cannot get out of my chair!!! Fatigue hits like a wall. I got lost in the woods while hiking with my dog because of brain fog. I cried on the beach surfing with my friend because I could not paddle. My body felt like concrete.
I watched my normal low blood pressure go from 100/65 to 150/ 80. I wanted to stand and scream WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING TO ME!!!!  And still no one medical is listening.

I want to go to med school so I can start up a clinic for middle aged women.  I can't afford to do this, but boy am I mad!!

Brilliant post!! 

[CLKD]

So Girls - what can we do about it?  Medical Students are not joining up to be GPs or are heading abroad once qualified. Telling teens isn't the way to go, it's far too early to load them with yet more hormonal problems.

Drug Companies don't seem to be involved  i.e. holding meetings with GPs/patients … which other specialities do.  Maybe all our supportive GPs should retire and set up Meno Clinics around the countryside?

[dazned]

Great idea! However there would be no money in it,certainly none from NHS, as these " things" aren't seen as life threatening so where there is no financial support or gains to be had it ain't gonna happen more's the pity !