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[Taz2]

Sorry you are having such a tough time.  Are any of your children at home as it's half term? Although valium is good for short term relief of anxiety I can understand your reluctance to take it. What about the propanolol you used to take? If you read back through your past posts you will see the dosage you used to be on.  Can you still use that as it seemed to help you in the past. Walking around is a good way to get rid of adrenaline and I've used that technique in the past. Try to focus on the fact that this feeling will pass - do you use any relaxation tapes or breathing exercises. I know they can seem very insignificant when you are gripped by panic but if you can build it into every day it does have a calming effect.

I'm also sorry to read of your mum's illness. It's no wonder you are feeling as you are.

Taz x

[nelliedee]

Thanks girls
I have upped the propranolol and have taken vallium tiwice yesterday. Spoke to a horrid male gp who said to up the propranolol to 20mg 3 times a day and maybe have small dose of vallium at bedtime but no more as its addictive. That call made me more anxious. I have decided to take whatever vallium I want to (withing reason) over the couple of days just to get my body and mind a little more relaxed. Had a better sleep and managed to get back to sleep in the early hours. Feel a little better this morning

[nelliedee]

Hi sparkle
That's just how I felt, Ive been waking at 2 and 3 in the morning for a while and this past week I have been getting up rather than lay there which has added to my tiredness. This morning however I woke at 3 and purposely laid there till I went back to sleep. The day before I woke up panicking and got up, I will try not to get up anymore. the sickness was the same as when I was pregnant and I have bought some ginger nut biscuits today to help it if it returns. My headaches/migraines were vile and everything added to my anxiety especially me. I think I put myself into a constant panic mode so alongside the small dose of vallium I started breathing into a paperbag yesterday and I feel it definitely helped. My mind is still rumbling away but today I can function and think logically whereas the past week my thoughts were totally irrational and I couldn't seem to stop them, vile vile feeling. I am about to book a local cbt counsellor and have just been for a 10 min walk xx

[CLKD]

Early morning wakening is a classic sign of depression and should not be ignored.

Hormones can cause panic attacks as can dreaming about them.  I often woke in deep terror from around 5.30 a.m. and would have to get out of bed immediately …… DH had to go to work but would come home each lunchtime to administer my medication which he took out of the house as I felt un-safe.  I would sit for hours staring at 4 walls  not daring to move in case I felt worse.

I take 40mg propranolol for anxiety at night - and if necessary 40mg in the morning.  Valium taken regularly for 3-5 days is OK.  If your GP has recommended 2mg did he suggest upping the dosage today?  I took 5mg x 3 for a month then as necessary.  Because I knew it worked for me I didn't need to rely on it ………… but my GP was supportive.

How did you get on 2-day and does the anxiety ease during the day ….

[nelliedee]

I am so much better today clkd thank you. the propranolol 20mg 3 times a day has helped calm me down and I did take 2mg vallium last night. Tonight I do not feel any need for the vallium at all. Yesterday I was desperate for the vallium. I have early morning waking on and off for 3 years and its definitely hormonal but these last 3 months since mum was told her cancer had spread my hormonal dips each month have been terrifying and I informed my gp 2 months ago that I was feeling frightened on my period week. Add in the vertigo with projectile vomiting, stuck on my left side for almost a whole week and period started at the same time I think was a recipie for disaster and disaster is what I went thru, totally vile. Obviously now dreading my next period but am on mid range propranolol and so there is room to up it if things go downwards again. I am extremely proud of the way I have managed peri meno over the last 2-3 years and this forum has been such a huge part. Your tips on eating 3 hourly, bettes 321 exercise and reading everything has helped me an awful lot. I now appear to be heading towards the end of my periods and things have ramped up which is also coincided with mums care, I am finding things tough, mentally so I am pulling out all the stops to help myself. I am going to try a little meditation each day for a while to see what benefits it brings xx

[CLKD]

Take a Valium in case 

What support is your Mum getting regarding her cancer? Does MacMillan offer any day by day advice?

There's no reason why you shouldn't sit and contemplate 10 mins. in every hour ……...

[nelliedee]

Mums having chemo at the moment and sees the cancer nurses on that day to discuss issues. Once mum finds it hard to walk I will then ask for help at home as mum lives with us. She is actually doing very well considering her prognosis. I try and focus on all the positives and so does she. We have a marie curie lady we can ring if we want. Up until 2 weeks ago I escorted mum everywhere on hospital visits but the last 2 weeks have been to difficult for me to go as I have vertigo. Mum is ok having the chemo as she knows the routine and hopefully I will have my balance back in the next few weeks. At the moment I cannot go with her so she takes some knitting to do as we are there 8 hours.

I had a few what feel like panic attacks thru the night but managed to get a decent amount of sleep so that's good. They maybe adrenaline surges.
Just had an email back from a cbt counsellor so I am looking forward to meeting her in order to get a grip on this.

[CLKD]

I would ask for help before it is required …….. in case there is a crisis 

Thanks for the update.  I got used to going for radiation treatment, met the same staff and patients - a Jamiacan lady and I had to wear straw hats as it was very hot that Summer, so we had 'dress the hat' competitions ….. of course, with her background of bright colours etc., she won each day  ……..

You may find that 'life' plays on your mind in the night = anxiety surges ……. at least you had some sleep! always a Blessing 

How do you feel dizzy-wise this morning?

[nelliedee]

dizzys are better today, best day ive had. Anxiety today has been troublesome again but have gp appoint later so will talk over the meds. I have about 5 panic attacks today. They start and I have to talk myself calm, they make me rigid. I am going to ask the gp why when someone is so overwhelmed with fear and that fear keeps surging, why do they keep insisting we only take valium for a day or so as basically it just scares the living daylights out of us when all we prob need is a few days constant low dose to resume some kind of normality. Not forgetting I am someone who understands anxiety inside out and for the past 2 years as worked damn hard on reducing it and I might add I have been successful through a very topsy turvy time in my peri years. I do understand I am under emmense pressure with mum and that made me extremely vunerable and I feel getting the 'possible labarynthitis' was the final straw BUT I had been visiting the GP prior to that with concerns that my mental state around my period was becoming frightening and that I wanted hrt and didn't care about the risks. She would not give it to me due and said it didn't help anxiety anyway only helps hot flushes. I wouldn't treat my dog like this, I would give her a sedative if she was running around in an agitated state. I will keep myself busy today

[dazned]

Hi Everyone's mom,

Your doctor is wrong IMO !

I don't get hot flushes but crippling anxiety which is why I went on HRT and does work for some people ! Please ask for referral if you want to try it .

Good luck 

[Linsnw]

Have you ever taken st Johns wort?  It had a massive effect on my anxiety after a few weeks.
I wish you a speedy journey through this difficult time. xxx

[bramble]

I think it is a good thing that your GP is a bit wary of you using valium too much. It can be very addictive - been there, got the tshirt, got hooked. Upping your dose of beta blockers is the more sensible way to go. When I had labyrinthitis years ago I found I was getting a lot of panic attacks as well. Don't know if there is a link there or not. Have you got any tablets for the dizziness? I think it was something like Stemitil I had which helped.
Fingers crossed the CBT will help.
Bramble

[nelliedee]

I accepted her answer regarding the hrt as I just wanted the awful anxiety to be treated. I don't trust AD'S so its pointless but I do trust propranolol. I was given a small dose last time (3 yrs back) a few days vallium and although I did visit my gp every 2nd or 3rd day for reassurance I steadily improved. I now have a new gp as my other one left the surgery and its tough. Trying to look at the positives and there are some so that's good but I feel like the last 2 weeks have been too tough on me and I have been made to feel guilty about taking a light sedative to get me through until the beta blockers kick in. One day I can cook dinner, just and only by the skin of my teeth and the next I am like a crazed rigid animal unable to cope with the smallest chore. My worried mind goes into overdrive and it takes so so long to calm myself down. I look like a crazy cave woman. And then you read or see a gp who says hormones are not a problem..... REALLY !!

[CLKD]

Her time will come 

Some ADs can ease anxiety symptoms.  Valium when used with common sense is useful.  Betablockas can help with anxiety surges but I need another fast acting drug when floored by anxiety.

[Linsnw]

my GP is older and was really empathetic as i got the feeling she'd been there...i always ask for her now.