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[BrightLight]

Time will tell whether HRT is a truly good idea or not - the research is now swinging more in favour on many fronts.  None of us know what the future will bring - we just have to live in the here and now. 

Thanks for your post - the experience of you and your mother just shows how individual an experience it is and you have both found your own ways to get on with your lives.  I didn't think you were rambling, it was interesting.

[honorsmum]

I think menopause absolutely can be compared to thyroid problems, insofar as neither is static. Have a read of any thyroid forum and you will find the same sorts of posts as on here - "my doctor says my bloods are fine, but I don't feel good. Should I change my dose?" Likewise, many GPs treat thyroid issues entirely on blood tests and not symptoms, and refuse to run more than basic tests if the results show "normal". Also, the way the majority of doctors medicate thyroid problems is also a problem - have a look at the Stop The Thyroid Madness site.

Why are fluctuating sex hormones seen as any different? Just because menopause is something every woman goes through, why can't we treat it with the same respect (for want of a better word) as thyroid problems?

My daughter is 11 and diagnosed with ADHD at 7. It won't kill her, it's not an illness as such, but she is medicated. I can't begin to tell you how much controversy exists over medicating children with ADHD, and even whether ADHD exists - some people believe it is simply lazy parenting, too much junk food, not enough discipline, and some people believe that medicating is doping your children for an easier life; "kiddy cocaine" is what it is described as.
I can tell you that the difference it's made to her has been HUGE, not only academically but in a "quality of life" way.
I see the whole menopause issue in a similar way - we are talking about chemical imbalances that can have a huge impact, even if not life-threatening.

[BrightLight]

Honorsmum - I see your point about thyroid and hormonal imbalance being similar and I totally agree about the way thyroid problems are treated.  In the realms of clinical practise though thyroid issues are only treated when deemed dysfunctional enough and that's it.  I think sub clinical thryoid issues ought to be treated to attempt to resolve the imbalance first but a holistic view of the patient is needed in my opinion and that isn't what clinical practise does - it is reductionist.  I agree that hormonal issues for women should be taken more seriously, where I think we differ is that I think early balancing of these issues can resolve them.  That's why I don't see them as the same as thryoid/diabetes as treated in clinical NHS practise.

I totally understand the attitude about ADHD - and I really do see similarities with hormone and thyroid issues, my own personal view is that medicine should and will shift to understanding these chemical imbalances more and ways of treating them - either by medicine to rebalance or other ways that restore function.  I have worked with children and teenagers with ADHD and have a dear friend with a son with ADHD and othe difficulties.

My reference to thyroid issues are in relation to my nephew who has down syndrome, who had low thyroid function blood tests, my sister treated him without medication via other means and his levels restored.  A year later the levels were not good again, she took him to a 'functional medicine doctor' which is a more wholistic route for extensive tests - the thing that the regular medical profession didn't pick up was that he wasn't low in the thyroid hormones as such, it was a case of them not 'firing' correctly - consequently it was down to my sister to find the right treatment before resigning herself to the medication that was offered which wouldn't have solved the problem.  My nephew is fine now.  It's all very complicated and I don't begin to understand fully, but I do believe better attention is needed to all these conditions.

[Dancinggirl]

honorsmum - You make some very good points. Life has taught me that we must keep an open mind and make our own judgements having had professional advice and done comprehensive research.  Too many people are willing to think the worst and judge peoples actions without finding out the background and reasoning. 
When my son was diagnosed with a language disorder that put him loosely on the autistic spectrum, my sister-in-law tried to reassure me that he would be fine once they taught me the right parenting skills !!!!! 
She proceeded to tell me I needed to read to him more and not let him watch television.     She rarely saw him and never bothered to ask how or why he had been given this diagnosis - she just assumed I wasn't teaching him to talk in the right way.  My son was 4 when he was diagnosed and had had speech therapy for 2 years because I had been concerned very early on that there was something wrong. The speech therapist had given me strategies to encourage his communication - everything needed visual backup - he learned a lot of his language through television and video because there was the visual to illustrate the words. Reading to him was pointless as he simply didn't understand the words. My daughter was actually his best therapist(she was only 2 years older than him and we never asked her to help him)  - she quickly picked up on the strategies he needed and it was delightful to hear her chatting away to him as they played together. HE spoke his first full sentence at four and a half - all the words were in the wrong order but we understood what he wanted to tell us - oh the joy! We were doing some craft work at the kitchen table late afternoon and the light was fading; he suddenly said " No more dark in room" !!!!! he wanted the light on!
He is 25 now, he left school with 6 GCSEs, he has done a variety of jobs, he passed his driving test first time and his difficulties are very subtle now - but he is one of life's vulnerable souls. Sadly my sister-in-law now has a granddaughter who is autistic and it seems she is an expert on this subject I grit my teeth as she tells me all about the therapy etc her granddaughter is getting - clearly I know nothing.
I know this is really branching away from the theme of this thread but I wanted to reinforce your point about people being ill informed and judgmental.  Dg x

[honorsmum]

Brightlight - I think we're singing from the same hymn sheet. 

DG - thank you for sharing your experiences with your son. How lucky he was to have you as his advocate. 
My daughter was my first baby. I knew she was different from being very tiny. I did everything I could to be  a "perfect" parent - I breastfed her for 18 months, weaned her at 6 months on all organic, homecooked food, she never had a dummy, took her to all sorts of baby classes etc. So you can imagine how we felt when we were asked to consider medication when she was 7. I cried buckets - I'd failed her, somehow, and now I was going to poison her. I researched and waded through countless reports of ADHD being a modern phenomena of rubbish parenting, the horrific dangers of "drugging" children for a quiet life etc. - but was faced with a child that had such poor short term memory she couldn't remember how to write her own name the  way twice, couldn't learn to read, couldn't remember her friend's names, had no impulse control, couldn't stop moving etc. We gave her the first tablet, and she said, "mummy, my brain has gone quiet!" She is now thriving at school, got the lead role and memorized a long script for the school play, is happy and focused, and our quality of life as a family is better.

It really does draw parallels with menopause treatment for me - as has been said, it's about weighing up all considerations and doing what's right for your particular set of circumstances...and ignoring those that don't agree with your choices.

[BrightLight]

Honorsmum - goosebumps reading "mummy, my brain has gone quiet!" Blessed relief for her, for you, that this route proved effective - you both sound like aware, attentive and loving parents to me

 

[honorsmum]

Honorsmum - goosebumps reading "mummy, my brain has gone quiet!" Blessed relief for her, for you, that this route proved effective - you both sound like aware, attentive and loving parents to me

Thank you.xxx
Yes, quite an incredible moment - even her consultant remarked what a perceptive observation that was for a 7 year old.

[BrightLight]

I don't work with children anymore but my heart will always be stirred by memories of amazing individuals, those with challenges, those without, there is more than meets the eye, the rule books etc with ALL of us.  Though I have noticed that many of the children with additional needs or challenges have incredible insight, whether that is the parenting, which I think it might be or the mere human spirit that is determined, I don't know.

I think if all children feel they have the freedom to adapt, learn, change, express and find their way in a supportive environment at a young age, they are set for life, whatever there particular 'make-up' is.

My friends son is finally learning enough about himself to challenge his own behaviour, he might not be able to stop his anxieties all the time, but he talks in a way that us adults have to learn from Claire Weekes books!  He says, mummy 'that's just my angry brain and I think I need to go and distract myself' x

[scriv]

Sadly, I think you have totally misunderstood us on this thread, janm.

[Jari]

Some great posts on this thread. Just wondered if any of you still on forum and if so, how you're feeling/getting on now? X

[Hurdity]

Jari - this and the others are very old threads and members are often not posting any more or have left - maybe start a new one?

Hurdity x

[Jari]

Thanks Hurdity for pointing that out! . I was just wondering how they were doing, but as you say, they've no doubt moved on now and have it behind them. Thank you!