For me, the worst thing about the menopause has been the crippling anxiety. I have been suffering from it for years (about 7-8 I think). For the past few years it has been kept in check but my world has grown so much smaller. I very rarely go out, do no exercise. There seems to be no rhyme nor reason behind what does or does not cause the anxiety to overwhelm me. Some things I sail through without a thought, other things (like meeting my sister for lunch) can leave me paralysed with fear. Even though I have done it loads of times before. I live on my own, neither do I have family and when the anxiety gets really bad, there is no outside distraction to help me or to gain confidence from. I tend to curl up and become overwhelmed.
It is only recently that I have realised how small my world has grown - and this is at a time when I should be broadening my horizons and getting out there to enjoy life - I have the time, the money but also the fear.
I have just read a book by Paul David 'At last a life'. He advocates doing things despite how you feel and to accept the feelings of anxiety but not try to control them - in fact, to stop fighting to get better. Similar to the Claire Weekes books which I read years ago.
So, to cut a long story short - this is the beginning. I aim to go out more even if it is just a short walk to the local café for a coffee, to do more - I have just joined a gym and intend to do 2 classes a week, to do these things regularly despite how I feel. They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions but I hope to prove that wrong! I know it is going to be hard but I must get a life.
Wish me luck!
Bramble
