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[Ju Ju]

CLKD, your post reminds me of a poem by Edna St Vincent Millay called Time Does Not Bring Relief. I'm too lazy to type it out.

 When you are bereaved, grieving is a job you have to do. The pain may not lessen, but in time you can build your life around it and laugh and enjoy life again. Ju Ju xx

[CLKD]

 

[Dyan]

I didn't know whether to start a new thread as I didnt want it to detract from dulcianas but I thought it was apt for the same one.
Hope this is ok with you Dulciana and everyone?

I had to have my 9 1/2 year old dog put down yesterday.
I am devastated.
The house is so quiet and empty.
I am hurting so much.
I'm feeling so guilty and angry and keep wondering if she could have gone on longer,but in my heart I know it was the kindest thing to do and we did it out of love.
I really miss her.
Everywhere I look I see her things.
I was in the loo and looked down and found one of her hairs.
I can't Hoover the carpet because she is still on it.
Am I being silly?
I know this is all part of grieving because I've lost pets before. I wasn't going to put it on here but felt I had to get my feelings out.
The whole family is devastated.

[CLKD]

Oh that explains the other thread 

As a pet owner I found that even when our pets were ill, the end was sudden.  All 4 'told' me that they were 'ready', in fact, I know it was co-incidence, but 10 mins. after I phoned the Vet to come out to our cat, he breathed a huge sigh: of relief?

I still shed tears when I come across a lead/dish/hair …….. and was months before I hoovered our stair carpet because there were mixes of hair from them all  so put away that Hoover for a while!

Also some breeds do not have a 'long' Life span ……… particularly the larger ones. 

You will beat yourself up for a while I think we all do.  But eventually you will see that this was the kindest for her : "If it should be ………… "

[Dyan]

  CLKD.

She was a Bernese mountain dog so yes big.
Life expectancy usually 7-8 years so she did well.
She just didn't seem old in her face no grey hairs.
She seemed to have got old all of a sudden in her body.
It was her back end that gave up and she also had arthritis in her shoulder.

[CLKD]

Bernese rang a bell this end ……… we had 2 here for several years …….

Large boned dogs don't seem to have a long Life span whereas the terriers ……. my cocker injured her back at age 9 when playing with a JR - she yelped at the time but kept running, that afternoon she was in the Vet's, again for a pain relieving jab  ……. it was that injury that took her from us eventually, aged almost 14.  She went 'off' her legs and looked so frightened, I couldn't live with that look ………. so the Vet attended the next morning.     I knew with all the money in the World I could not have done any more to keep her going.  We have the privilege of being able to relive pain …….. for them 

It's always a shock!

[littleminnie]

Sorry about your dog Dyan. 

[Dyan]

Bless you CLKD
Thank you LM - miss her so much.

[Tabbycat]

Aww, Dyan, sorry to hear about your dog. The loss is always painful, doubly so when it's sudden.

Guilt and anger are normal - personally I think guilt is hardest to deal with because it can eat away at you. The pain will fade eventually, although I know it won't feel like that right now. Allow yourself to grieve for her, and try and focus on the wonderful years you gave each other and that you were there at the end for her.

Many years ago when one of our cats passed away we planted something - I think it was a rose bush - in the garden in her memory. These things do help.

[Dyan]

  Tabbycat.

[Limpy]

Dyan      

[smudgy14]

Hi there I have just logged in today after being of site since march when we lost our wee dog  ,we are still devastated we had the same two years ago ,we still can't believe they are gone ,the most recent lost is still raw we still watch when we move to check he not under our feet ,of hear bedroom door opening and go to let him out after him wakening ,we know both of them will never be forgotten.We had a  cupboard we kept their food etc in and was left empty till yesterday we couldn't bear to put just anything in it so as I do some baking now and then and they loved a bit of cake we decided to put my baking things in it.This will seem daft to some people but when your pets are part of your family the loss is awful.
We have kept a memory box which we put their leads,brush,comb and bits of their fur etc in and their wee urns and pictures are in the living room so we still say hello each day.The hurt and loss never goes away but you do accept it over time .Maybe a memory box will help you to.
Look after yourself.x

[Dyan]

  Limpy & smudgy14

[honeybun]

So sorry Dyan. 


Honeyb
x

[dulciana]

It's absolutely okay, Dyan and no, you're not being silly.   That is exactly how I've been.  In fact, I could have written your post myself.  I found two of our cat's whiskers on a chair she used to sit on - I've put them in a wee box, as a keepsake.  I just can't bear to throw them away.  And as for hoovering the carpet - I couldn't do that at first, either.   It's so painful, isn't it?   I also felt guilty after she was put to sleep.  But, like you, whenever I thought about it, I knew that she couldn't have carried on any longer.   I hope you will find that time heals.  I'm beginning to find that now.  Have you got any favourite photos of your dog, that you could store somewhere you can see (I talk to the one I've got!) whenever you need to?   She must have been very special to you.   That's why you're feeling this so much.  My thoughts are with you.  Take care.      Dulciana