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[dizzydee]

Hi everyone,

I came across this forum whilst trying to find information how menopause affects your sex drive.  All i can say is thank god i found you!!! I seriously thought i was going insane over the last 3 years.  What i and my doctor thought was clinical depression now seems to be the start of the homones going on permant leave.  My blood tests have been coming back as abnormal since 2011 but never once was menopause mentioned by my GP, although i have queried this due to erratic monthly cycles and now the disapearance of them. This weekend has been a nightmare with mood swings, sleepless nights,night flushes etc, you all know what im talking about!!.  But for me the biggest issue is i have gone from a healthy pyhsical relationship with my soul mate to absolutely nothing.  We have been together for 2 years and are due to get married in November this year.  Although my partner has been understanding this is becoming a real issue for us.  When i have trawled through the internet i have found very little to do with loss of libido due to menopause so i am wondering if it ever comes back.  I went to my GP yesterday and he reluctantly precscribed me premique 0.625/5mg.  Although i had asked for tibolone.  How long will it take for me to feel better on this and will i ever recover my physical relationship.  i dont think i could survive without it as i dont want to lose the love of my life.  I am 47 by the way.  Thanks for listening Dx

[CLKD]

HORMONES! mine got up and went in 1977, 18 months after being married  so we've had to turn to other methods of arousal  ……….

Have a browse of the menus, left of screen.  Loss of libedo can be a problem at any time of Life ……….

[groundhog]

Hi dizzy dee,
Sorry to hear about your problems .  I too suffer from loss of libido and it also causes issues for me and my husband.  We have been married for 33 years but even so occasional intimacy is nice and keeps him sweet.  But my libido has gone and I can't seem to find it anywhere!  Coupled with pain 'down there' for which I have vagifem,  it's not a great part of my life.  I too hope it will come back one day.  In fairness,  my lack of libido may be nothing to do with meno - could be just life as it's stressful ATM and hubby and I are permanently arguing and bickering.  This fortunately does not seem to the the case with you
Hope you get some answers soon xxx

[Taz2]

Hi dizzydee - welcome to the forum.

The lack of libido issue has been discussed lots of times on here but it's been difficult to find a solution. You are young to have lost yours though and I wonder whether anything else is to blame. Are you on any antidepressants for example or any other medication? These can affect libido. Also, there is a difference between not wanting to bother but being ok once you get started (libido) and not feeling any sexual response even if you do try (lack of arousal). Doctors sometimes lump both under "libido".

Your doc wont have been able to prescribe tibolone if you have had a period within the last year by the way.

If you use the search button in the blue bar at the top of the page you can read other posts on this subject.

Taz x

[Shazzie]

Hi Dizzydee and welcome to this lovely site.

I have only been on this site for a short while but during that short time I have received lots of reassurance from the lovely ladies here.  I have suffered with palpitations since my periods stopped on and off and the ladies here have been brilliant.

I am sorry you are suffering with loss of sex drive.  I haven't suffered with that yet but I expect it is on its way.

I hope someone can come up with some help for you. 

Shazzie x

[dizzydee]

Thanks guys for the advice.  I think i will have to wait and see how the HRT goes.   Do you know if its fast acting or is it like anti-depressants that take a few weeks to kick in?
Dxx

[dizzydee]

Taz ive been on anti depressants for a number of years now.  I was fine until christmas time.  I was having sleeping issues as my partner snores quite badly so originally put it down to this.  But over the last couple of months i have no desire whatsoever.  Coupled with the sleeplessness, fatigue etc i did think its no wonder. But it appears that now i cant even be aroused which is horrifying for us both.
Dx

[Taz2]

It is devastating when it first happens. Anti depressants are known to cause problems with arousal in some people. It could be a cumulative effect coupled with other stresses? It may be worth finding out about the particular side effects of whichever anti-d you are on.

Taz x

[Hurdity]

Hi dizzydee

  from me too.

So sorry to hear about your lack of sex drive and about your doctor prescribing anti-depressants for a hormonal issue - sad to say there are too many examples of this and it should be stamped out!!!!

Just one thing to add re your HRT - you haven't how long since your last period? I am presuming you are post-menopausal (ie as Taz says no period for 12 months)if you were asking for Tibolone and have been prescribed Premique?

However my view especially in your situation - even if you are post-menopausal, would be to re-start a cycle if you can - just to make sure you find an HRT type that suits you. If you start a continuous combined one - and have side effects - you won't know if it's due to the oestrogen or the progestogen. If you are not post-menopausal, then you should be on a cyclical HRT anyway (designed to give a  monthly bleed)

I would see how you get on with this one (if post-meno) and if no improvement in libido I would ask for a consultation with a menopause clinic so they can give you specialist advice.

By the way did the doc give you a reason not to prescribe Tibolone, and why was he reluctant? It is advised to take HRT at least until the natural average age of menopause (51/52) to protect bones heart and he should know this.

Hurdity x

[ladybird52]

Hi dizziedee

Sorry you are having problems. I personally found hrt helped. I was originally prescribed premique which took effect almost straight away and made everything more comfy and also after getting more sleep felt more relaxed and open to love making but libido unchanged and have to make an effort to get in the mood but don't expect ever again to feel like I did as a young woman. My husband still thinks he's 21 in his head!

[Linsey44]

Hi dizzeedee, welcome to MM.

Hope you get sorted out, maybe hrt will do wonders. For you, only time will tell.

This topic got me thinking about my own sex drive or rather the lack of it.  I am 44 and told perimenopausal at 42. At 43 had hysterectomy and then at 44 got ovaries out few weeks ago so, have just started having sex again the hrt helps with the physical aspect of not being sore but has done little to increase libido.  I am on tibolone.

I assume this is probably how its going to be.  So much for all the articles i read in magazines saying to increase sex drive we actually have to have sex to increase our libido. Its a bit of a catch 22 situation.

Does it actually work? Should we have more sex even if we arent in the mood which technically should put us in the mood for more sex?

Answers please ladies, what are your thoughts?

[hotstff]

I read recently, that Oral HRT creates a bolus effect in the liver and can adversly affect any free floating testosterone:
(I wish I could remember where I read it, but I definitely did)

Ah found the article:-

...........estrogen replacement medications and oral contraceptives are absorbed by the gastrointestinal tract and reach the liver in a "bolus". This so called "bolus effect", induces the liver to increase its production of a substance, "sex hormone binding globulin" (SHGB) which binds to circulating testosterone, leaving less "unbound" or "free" testosterone available to maintain libido. This is not well known and is often not recognized as a cause for a diminished libido.

So, would this mean (maybe) that patches or gels could be a better HRT route to go?
As this would bypass the liver?

My 3 month review is coming up, and I also have noticed a significant decrease in libido since staring oral HRT (into my 2nd month now).

I'm wondering if I should suggest to doc (at my 3 month review) that I take patches or gel or maybe Tib (something or other) think its called tivolone  (similar to toblerone?  ) anything other than tablets.

Thanks for any advice

[Linsey44]

Hi its tibolone i take and its an oral tablet.

[hotstff]

Lindsey,
Is it any good?

(Is it supposed to contain a small amount of testosterone?)

[Linsey44]

Hi hotstuff, i've only been on it around 5 weeks, def helped with dryness, and havent had any side effects.

Anything is worth a go, you can always try something else if it doesnt work out for you.
Keep us posted on what you decide.