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[Delilah]

Hi Tilly
Just wanted to send you the biggest
Hang in there, the light at the end of the tunnel may seem a long way off right now but believe me it is there and you will feel better.  I wish I could offer you more help but I'm not as knowledgeable as some here but just want you to know we're all here for you.

Please take care
Delilah x

[TillyD]

You're all lovely aren't you. Thank you.

Yes, I'm already on the private route. That's how I managed to get the HRT in the first place. I had to self refer because the GPs ( I tried 3 in 2 separate surgeries) refused to prescribe it.

I have an appointment at the end of next week. I'll be on my own because hubby has to do childcare. If I manage to stay calm I predict that I will be told to "give it a trial" which is how the cons in the hospital put it before my biopsy etc. The definition of trial varies though doesn't it. I'm not prepared to risk my job over this. I HAVE to be 100% full of energy to do it.

I started a new job on Monday   And already I am panicking over it. Feeling depressed literally isn't an option. I'm the 3rd in a line of teachers that all left due to stress of the job.

I'm not expecting anyone to come up with any solutions for me. I just needed some support as I've been forced into a decision that I would not have taken if I had understood all the facts. And I feel that the information u needed was kept from me.

[Joyce]

Working with children of any age is stressful without the addition of the menopause. I hope you get some satisfaction next week. You know we'll be here to support you, no matter what.
Do let us know how you get on. 

[CLKD]

 

[wornoutmum]

HI
Reading this trail - there are some amazing women out there and Hurdity's email has given some excellent advice - I would definitely agree that you must see a consultant gynaecologist privately who specialises in menopause, HRT etc and ask for a private referral from your GP - no ifs or buts - it'll be money well spent. Go in to all appts with pertinent questions listed for the consultant to address which presents yourself well and making that positive step to improve the quality of your life. Private means you are seen quickly, treatment if surgical can be done on the NHS and its likely that appt will clash with work! But if you give your dept head enough time they will have to organise cover. It'll be half a day tops!

Teaching adolescents is immense (hormonal girls could be worse?) and it may be worth taking a lead from the lads great humour, maybe tap into this during your day, it might help get you and them? I try being very self effacing with lads - not sure if it works but it helps me! 

[CLKD]

My attitude would be : "I'm being paid to teach, whether you learn or not isn't my problem.  Now, learn or ....... " 

[susie56]

In the secondary school I taught in a few years ago at least five female teachers of meno age ( all strong teachers who were well respected) all went off with stress struggling with anxiety, depression and meno symptoms.  Two had breakdowns and the others were close -if they hadn't retired early or reduced their commitments ( one went to be a Teaching Assistant)- they would probably have been the same.
Teaching full time is VERY difficult when you are meno age.  I'm with CKLD!!
Best of luck.

[TillyD]

Oh great. I feel so much better now

[Joyce]

Take it one day at a time. Hopefully you will have better idea after next week's appointment.

[CLKD]

You need the attitude that you are going to get from the Class.  In other words, you are being paid to teach - it's up to them whether they listen etc..  Hopefully you will get back up from the Head of Year and the Head of School - my friend didn't see her Head of School for a whole Term, he/she kept him/herself in the Office with the door shut  - no support there then. 

Try not to shout at the Class. If they rampage, throw mobiles across the room, spit and carry on, sit quietly with a book until they begin to listen.  Usually curiosity will break through ......... go into Class every time and say 'good morning/afternoon' and until you get a polite reply, then do absolutely nowt.  Keep reiterating that you are paid to teach, it's up to them .......

My Mum is in her 80s and can stop the street with one look  ..........

[Shula]

How are you doing, Tilly?

[ellie66]

Tilly as you are South London can I suggest you google Mrs Sheela Purkayastha Consultant Gynaecologist. A famous London NHS Teaching Hospital paid for me to see her privately, a long story. She is former Chelsea and Westminister Consultant. She is utterly brilliant. You can self refer to her. The Mirena coil made me feel utterly terrible as did the implanon the famous gynaecologist at my London Hospital wanted me to have another one but Mrs P and I talked and she agreed to sterilised me even though I had no children. She even did the more radical sterilisation op I wanted removing part of my fallopian tubes. I was terrified of an ectopic pregnancy. UCLH coughed up the money for consultation and surgery! She also has an interest in the menopause and psychosexual medicine too  She would be really worth the money. Big hugs. 

EDIT: She accepts self referrals no need for a referral letter.

[CLKD]

I would never suggest that a patient goes to see anyone without a referral from their GP!  It is un-ethical for a Consultant to see/treat a patient without the GP's knowledge.  Even in Harley Street 'they' require a referral letter and past history. 

[Taz2]

A referral letter from whom CLKD? As long as you are paying you can self refer to any private consultant surely?

Taz x

[CLKD]

A patient should always go via their family doctor.  Ethics and all that!  The letter will go from the Consultant tothe GP and I would think that some GPs might be very annoyed if they hadn't been involved in the paper trail.  I understand that one can now self refer with a GP's consent.  Years ago people were ripped off financially by self referring, particularly if they were searching for a non-existant cure for their problems.  As a medical secretary I would be surprised that any Consultant worth his salt would see a patient without a referral, either from a GP, a practice nurse, a physio. etc., or another Consultant.