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[CLKD]

So that's how 'they' deal with their patient numbers then ...........  - I wouldn't put up with it.  At a vulnerable time in a girl's Life we need support from medical staff.  If you lived alone? 

See what your GP suggests.  Perhaps there are 'things' in place that she can arrange so that you get regular visits from the District Nurse or Macmillan Team?  Give Macmillan a ring?

[Limpy]

Grumpy - it just doesn't seem right, day surgery for something that significant.
You need support, don't hesitate to cause hassle till you get it.

As CLKD says, speak to your GP, she may be able to provide some support, at least she's female, hopefully will have some sympathy / empathy. Macmillan would also be good to speak to.

Do you definitely want no reconstruction - was it offered?

How is your OH coping?

Lots of Hugs

 

[CLKD]

I think reconstruction can be done at a later date?  I always said I would not go for it ........

[honeybun]

I would actually prefer to come home. I would imagine that the district nurse would be in every day to look after your dressing.

I always feel better and more relaxed at home and would actually find it reassuring that I was considered well enough to come home and have all my home comforts around me.

I guess we are all different. I know my sis in law was discharged the same day as was one of my friends. It seems to be the done thing now.

Honeyb
X

[grumpy2008]

After the lumpectomy/node removal, I was very shaky and needed oxygen for about half an hour after I came round. Just an hour after that I was up, dressed and waiting for my other half to take me home! I walked to the car, and hubby said I looked dreadful... he was really concerned. But the next day I was grateful to be at home, able to put my feet up on the sofa and drink my tea whenever I wanted.

A mastectomy is a bigger op though, and more tissue removed... more chance of complication I would have thought... although they wouldn't let a person out unless they were ok, right? I need to ask questions about drains, visits by nurses etc. It would be a huge strain on my husband if there were no immediate support. He's doing ok, but is obviously stressed and I think it's time his feelings were taken into account too.

About reconstruction, it hasn't even entered my head to have it. I'm a small B cup, so I'd be lopsided but not drastically so. In my mind i want to minimise the surgery while having the best outcome, and having glanced over the options for reconstruction I don't think it's for me. If I were younger or perhaps larger in size, I might think more seriously about it 

[CLKD]

The area of surgery is likely to be larger certainly.  If it's because the Hospital fears infection  ........ I was happier in the Hospital for at least 3-4 days, it takes that for me to feel 'safe' enough to consider my own bed and particularly, our bathroom  .

I would have thought a stay of at least 24 hours 'in case' of complications?  DH was horrified when I mentioned this to him today, he immediately said 'no way'.

It will be i nteresting to see what your GP tells you, whether this day-case for mastectomy is now 'within normal limits'?

How are you both today?

[gilaray]

Hi Grumpy
I have just caught up with your posts
Personally I think there is nothing better than the comfort of your own home
Should you have any problems you can always go back xxxx

[Suzi Q]

I agree as long as you have a distric nurse coming in every day
Other wise call out GP everyday dressings have to be changed or checked xxxxxxx

[Taz2]

 So sorry to read this Grumpy. I would say go for the mastectomy having had two friends who decided to conserve their breasts and the cancer returned.

Is there any advice here http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/community/forums/latest   I appreciate that amongst the good news on this forum there may well also be sad news but you  may get first-hand advice.

Taz x

[Firewalker50]

Thinking of you Grumpy xx

[CLKD]

If anyone has had major surgery and come home too early - then had the worry of whether to return to Hospital: or not, as I did ...... then it is better to be in Hospital for those extra few days because should there be an emergency, all is to hand.  Unless one is in Private care.  If one is in Hospital one should be receiving care for that condition: care that family/husband are unable to give, it is very stressful for family/husband to watch their loved one following surgery anyway.  To have the added worry about if symptosm following surgery are 'within normal limits' ..... 
.  After care is the responsibility of the hospital Staff, not family/husband/wife ........

[honeybun]

I am sure the hospital would not let anyone out unless it was safe to do so.

I was discharged 2days after a C section because I asked if I could go home.

Honeyb
X

[grumpy2008]

It's been a funny old week so far. Yesterday I drove for the first time since the op and felt great - being mobile again was wonderful! Luckily I drive an automatic so don't have to move gears around (my op was on the left side).

This morning I felt sore again though, and there is more swelling again which is tender to touch. I had a (non-medical) appointment this morning so drove myself there (10 minutes away) but was shattered for the rest of the day and now on painkillers again. It's been 3 weeks since the op. So much for a 2-3 week recovery time! I guess everyone is different.

Thanks for the link, Taz  . I've been on various breast cancer forums and read many other people's experiences... but (and this might change with time) I don't feel part of it. First thing I said to my hubby when I was diagnosed was that it 'wasn't me', that I'm not part of that 'club' and don't want to feel in any way a 'victim'. Not that anyone in my situation should feel a victim of course... it was just my reaction to being treated with sympathy, being counselled, being made the focus of all that medical attention simply because the 'C' word was being used. Does this make any sense? I want to read around and educate myself but I'm not ready to be involved  .

I hope it's ok to keep coming here and talking about it? I know it's not directly meno related, but my hormones have had a lot to do with it, and for me it's all part of my own peri-menopause journey.

I'm still taking time to make my decision regarding further surgery, although I know in my gut which way I'll probably go...

[Trey]

Hi Grimpy,  I honestly know exactly how you feel as to joining support groups.  I'm fighting a bit of exhaustion/depression/reality right now, but save for this forum and a few special friends I don't want a formal acknowledgement of life changes.  I just want to deal with it and ask for help when I need to and I love the friends who understand my running hot and cold and needing down time.  One more suggestion of 'volunteeering' as a solution to Don being dead and I swear I'll scream.  My real friends know I'll plod through my stuff and I know you'll get through your stuff.

I said you were an inspiration and you are, but I think our outlooks are not quite mainstream.

May be wrong, but don't know.

[CLKD]

I was offered the chance of speaking with ladies who had been through what was proposed for myself, but I didn't want to ..... I didn't want to speak with others who might not, in the long run, survive ....... my journey was mine (ours/DH).  I didn't even tell family until well after surgery, treatment and a good prognosis were available.  I couldn't deal with anyone else's feelings.

Little steps.