Donna, there are loads of threads about vaginal atrophy etc on the forum, so do check those out.
The gist is that you should feel free to liberally use as much local estrogen as necessary to feel better. You can use both Vagifem pessaries or similar PLUS Ovestin cream if you want something internal and external. I do think if your issues are UTIs that getting something internal is going to help get the estrogen closer to the bladder.
You should feel free to use local estrogen every day forevermore if necessary and any doctor who insists you should reduce to twice a week is simply wrong. Many women need it daily. It is local and won't go systemic.
And for the weight situation, I can highly recommend (been on my own journey here) eating a very high protein diet (like 1g of protein per lb of desired body weight, per day - for me that is 145-150g of protein a day) PLUS strength training. You can do this at home using dumb bells, you don't need to go to a gym. There is a great app for iPad or laptop called CGX (Caroline Girvan) which has an Ultimate Beginner programme on it and is really excellent. I'm on my 3rd programme with Caroline and with the high protein as well, my body has changed beyond belief.
There is also a great podcast called Metabolism and Menopause by Stephanie Crassweller which has loads of info on the best nutrition (high protein) and strength training for fat loss in menopause.